NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
Frugal Fatigue Is Real: How to Stop Saving Burnout and Start Spending on Purpose
09 Mar 2026
Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.
Chapter 1: What is frugal fatigue and how does it affect budgeting?
Hey, Sean, what's the last thing you treated yourself to?
I had a week recently where I accidentally bought three pairs of running shoes. What? Three? I don't know if I told you I'm going to be running around Mount Hood over the summer. And so I'm training and I need a few different pairs of shoes to prepare for that. Today, we'll be chatting about treating yourself and how to balance it with savings goals, which I am doing, by the way.
Welcome to NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast, where you send us your money questions and we answer them with the help of our genius nerds. I'm Sean Piles.
And I'm Elizabeth Ayola. This episode's question comes from a listener named Michael by text, and it's about balancing, budgeting, and treating yourself. Here it goes. Hi, NerdWallet. Essentially, I have my savings goals and I'm working to meet them. However, because of this, I often don't go out, go on fun trips, aka treat myself.
I usually stay inside, eat cheap meals, and shame myself on any money that I spend. What do you recommend I can do to help me enjoy life a little and not obsess about my savings goals to my detriment? Thanks.
To help us answer Michael's question on this episode of Smart Money, we're joined by personal finance writer Kim Palmer. Hey, welcome back to Smart Money, Kim.
Hi, Sean and Elizabeth. Thank you so much for having me.
Kim, it sounds like Michael is experiencing a term called frugal fatigue, and that's essentially a burnout that can happen when you're perpetually cost cutting or have a restrictive budget. Now, the issue with frugal fatigue is that it can lead to impulsive shopping or this kind of cycle of saving and then shaming yourself, as Michael seems to be experiencing.
Saving is not always fun, I know personally, but it definitely shouldn't feel like punishment. Now, Michael said they often shame themselves on the money that they spend. So Kim, what is money shaming and what are some causes?
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Chapter 2: What causes money shame and how can it be addressed?
Give Elizabeth all the money now.
Yes. Absolutely. What about you, Sean?
I feel like I grew up with two kind of contradictory money stories. One was that money was tight and we didn't have enough of it, so you better be frugal. And then at the same time, I witnessed my parents spend kind of lavishly on things that in retrospect, I wonder if they could have comfortably afforded. They probably weren't able to afford it all the time.
And so I've struggled with that in my own life of having this kind of scarcity mindset of thinking, oh, money is going to be tight. I always better save for a rainy day, which, you know, isn't the worst thing. But then having this impulse to.
to get the shiny nice expensive thing and those are kind of incompatible and it leads to a lot of indecisiveness and sometimes shame when i am spending or regret that i didn't actually enjoy my money or sometimes feeling like why am i saving so much when i could die tomorrow so i just i vacillate between these feelings even to this day so maybe i should pick up that book that you read elizabeth or chat with a money therapist
Oh, thank you for sharing that, Sean. And Kim, I want to get to your money story if you have one. So we're going to put you on the spot, too. But at what point did you realize, Sean, that, hey, you know, you have this money story?
I don't think it was until I started working at NerdWallet and I understood the idea of what a money story is, because like I mentioned before, we go through life following these narratives that we're not even 100 percent aware of. And it was when I was actually going to buy a car in 2020.
And I had this impulse to get like a really nice car because I grew up with a really crappy Honda Civic where the muffler was dragging on the road behind me. And I really wanted a BMW or something similar. And I was able to find a car that was affordable for me within my budget and was still nice.
So that process of car buying helped me find what is a comfortable middle ground between having a nice thing that I know I want and deserve, but doing it in a way that's not going to break the bank.
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Chapter 3: How can understanding your money story help with spending guilt?
Just knowing your numbers can be really helpful here. So understand your budget, maybe with that 50, 30, 20 or 60, 20, 20 framework, whatever you want to play with and just know, hey, I actually do have all of my needs met by the money that I have coming in. And if you find that that's not the case, then we can talk about that in more detail then.
But if you actually have all your bases covered, that can give you a moment to have a sigh of relief and think, OK, how can I move forward beyond this? Because I'm understanding that my scarcity mindset isn't actually tied to the facts of my finances.
That's right. And looking at the progress of your goals, when I would shame myself about not saving enough, too, I remember looking back five years where I had literally, yeah, six years ago, I had zero dollars in retirement savings. And when I look at how much I have now, I'm like, girl, you saved a lot of money. Like, good job to you.
And that really did help alleviate some of that shame around spending. All right. What are some risks that come with being overly tight on spending? One that comes to mind for me is the equivalent of crash dieting and then binge eating. Ask me how I know.
Yeah.
Exactly. We want to have a system that is sustainable, that we can continue over long periods. And if we are just constantly saying no to ourselves and denying ourselves, it's hard or impossible to really stick with that budget and make it last. So that's why we want to just try to take a more balanced and sustainable approach. We're building in some of that fun.
And that way, your budget plan can continue without getting interrupted where you suddenly just want to, you know, drop it all aside and spend on something wild.
Kim, I'd love to hear how you've navigated savings goals in the past. Have you ever struggled with feelings of guilt or maybe obsessive saving in the past?
I sure have, and I think it goes back to what I mentioned before about just growing up with those constant messages of frugality. What resonates for me is something Elizabeth said about just making sure you have the fundamental structure that makes you feel secure in place. So if I know I have my emergency fund set, I'm saving for specific goals.
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