Passion Struck with John R. Miles
Don Martin on Why We’re Never Meant to Go Through Life Alone | EP 695
27 Nov 2025
Chapter 1: What insights does Don Martin share about loneliness?
Coming up next on Passion Struck.
A lot of times we engage with deep, dark topics, loneliness, death, religion, politics, all of those kinds of things, and come away just feeling really depressed and hopeless. And who am I? I'm just one person. I don't matter. And I think bringing it back to something that you all talk about, I think giving people a sense of purpose and a sense that this information isn't too much for you.
You can learn it. You can learn a new thing. You can embrace a new thing. You can talk about the big scary stuff in life. And your opinion on it, your involvement in it, even just your willingness to learn about it matters because you matter.
Welcome to Passion Struck. I'm your host, John Myles. This is the show where we explore the art of human flourishing and what it truly means to live like it matters.
Each week, I sit down with changemakers, creators, scientists, and everyday heroes to decode the human experience and uncover the tools that help us lead with meaning, heal what hurts, and pursue the fullest expression of who we're capable of becoming.
Whether you're designing your future, developing as a leader, or seeking deeper alignment in your life, this show is your invitation to grow with purpose and act with intention. Because the secret to a life of deep purpose, connection, and impact is choosing to live like you matter. Welcome back friends to Passion Struck.
This is episode 695 and today's episode is unlike any other I've ever released and intentionally so. If you're joining us for the first time, welcome to this extraordinary community. And if you're one of the many who return for every episode, thank you. Your loyalty is the heartbeat of this global movement.
As always, if this show has ever inspired you, here are two simple ways that you can help it grow. Share this episode with someone who will find it meaningful and leave a five-star review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. It's truly the most powerful way to help new listeners discover these conversations.
We are currently in the midst of our month-long series, The Irreplaceables, an exploration of the qualities that make us undeniably, unforgettably powerful. human. Earlier this week in episode 694, we were live at the Oxford Exchange in Tampa, Florida with the extraordinary Jane Marie Chen, who reminded us that healing begins when we stop performing for the world and start returning to ourselves.
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Chapter 2: How did the pandemic highlight our community bonds?
And in this conversation, Don dismantles the myths we've been told about loneliness. and what truly creates belonging. Together, we explore why half of American adults say they're lonely and why loneliness is not a personal feeling. We go into how the collapse of malls, walkable neighborhoods, and third places quietly rewired our social fabric.
We discuss why kids and teens, not older adults, are the loneliest groups in society. We unpack why social media isn't the villain we've made it out to be and what the science actually says about rebuilding connection in our neighborhoods, our relationships, and our own lives. This episode is a grounding reminder that being human is not about never feeling lonely.
It's about never facing loneliness alone. So whether today finds you surrounded by family, traveling, working, grieving, celebrating, or simply being, this episode is for you. Before we dive in, remember... You can find companion tools and frameworks for every episode at theignitedlife.net, my free sub stack where I help you apply these insights from these conversations to your life.
Now let's step into this powerful Thanksgiving day conversation with Don Martin. Thank you for choosing PassionStruck and choosing me to be your host and guide on your journey to creating an intentional life. Now, let that journey begin. I am so excited today to welcome Don Martin to PassionStruck. Hey, Don, how are you today? Hi, John. Thanks so much for having me. I love that you're here today.
I love it when I have fellow podcasters on the show. And you've been doing yours for a little bit longer than I have. What originally got you started?
Oh, gosh. Well, I started way back before podcasts were anything, when it was just a hobby that weirdos did in their basements back when it was like, oh, that guy has a podcast, when it was a weird thing. I remember the first time I started the first iteration of my podcast back in 2009.
But I remember realizing that like podcasts had changed in pop culture and like society at large because like seven, eight years in, I'd been doing it a while. I saw a commercial for some kind of prescription medication because we have those here in the U.S., commercials for prescription medications. And I remember I'm a busy attorney. I'm a busy doctor. I'm a busy mom, those kinds of things.
And it was like, I'm a busy podcast producer. I need Genomex or whatever. And I was like, That's a job now? What? When did this become a job? Yeah, I've been doing it so long that it went from a weird hobby to now celebrities do it for quick cash.
Yeah, I remember about four years ago, I got that question that I hate. What do you do? And just to keep it simple, I said, I'm a professional podcaster. And the person just looked at me like, you can actually make money doing that.
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Chapter 3: Why are children and teens the loneliest demographic?
This is all the same conversation.
Yeah. How pervasive do you think this is outside of the US? I think it's, we hear about it more in the US because that's where we live. But do you think this is pervasive across all of society or do you think it's more in the Western countries?
Yeah.
Chapter 4: How do marginalized communities experience loneliness?
Oh no, it's everywhere. It's just other countries outside of the US have taken it a little bit more seriously than we have. The Surgeon General called loneliness an epidemic in 2023, but Britain has had an organization devoted to understanding and combating loneliness for many years, so has Japan, so have many countries around the world. The US is actually late.
to the conversation and treating it as the mental and physical health crisis that it is, because it is actually a health crisis. In fact, what's wild is that loneliness exacerbates early death, early mortality from all causes. If you are lonely, you are much more likely to die from all causes. It's killing us sooner. It's not only a mental health issue, but it's a physical health issue.
And it impacts everything from like bad knees to IBS to cardiovascular failure and all points in between. It's wild how like... big loneliness gets and how quickly it gets that way. But yeah, it's everywhere. It's an everyone problem. It's like I said, it's something that's baked into our DNA to feel lonely.
And the US is actually late to the conversation and treating it like the crisis that it is.
I hope you're finding this Thanksgiving conversation with Don Martin meaningful. Part of what Don and I discuss is how loneliness often begins long before adulthood, how so many kids today feel invisible, unseen, or disconnected, even in busy, loving homes.
That's one of the reasons I wrote my upcoming children's book, You Matter, Luma, to help every child feel noticed, valued, and emotionally safe. It's a story that reminds children and adults that being seen isn't something you earn, it's something you deserve. If you want to help a child in your life feel a little more connected, visit YouMatterLuma.com or pre-order the book on Barnes & Noble.
Now, a quick break from our sponsors. Thank you for supporting those who support the show. You're listening to Passion Struck on the Passion Struck Network. Now, back to my Thanksgiving Day conversation with Don Martin. Yeah, I think something that you just said there is important for listeners to understand, and that is loneliness is kind of like a biological signal.
It's like hunger or thirst instead of a character flaw that people have. And I think that reframing is really important.
Yeah, absolutely. That was a big early aha moment for me was that we evolved loneliness for a purpose and it's trying to keep us alive. It's trying to keep us connected to other people. The problem is, especially in the modern day, we view other people as a source of fear. We are afraid of people, especially if they are not like us.
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Chapter 5: What evolutionary purpose does loneliness serve?
But two, I also think right now we are just hungry for expertise. We're just hungry for people that are just genuinely interested in making the world a better place and doing that through good research and good faith interrogation and willingness to admit that you don't know something and intellectual curiosity to go find it out.
And I think people are really hungry to see folks in positions of leadership or positions of authority One, admit when they don't know something. And two, model just what being an expert means. It doesn't mean that you know everything. It means you know how to learn. And it means how to maybe teach that to other people.
And I think people are just so hungry for people who are just trying to make the world a better place in their one little weird niche area.
Yeah. And one of the things that, as I was researching, you seem to cut across everything is that you use storytelling to cut through the noise. And it's allowed you to build followings of hundreds of thousands on social platforms and other things. Why do you think this storytelling is so important to cover often misunderstood topics or overlooked topics?
I talk about big stuff. My research, my books, my platform is used to talk about systemic problems, homophobia, transphobia, racism, bigotry, immigration, yada. My work has talked about all the stuff that you're not supposed to talk about at dinner, right? Religion, death, loneliness, big conversations that are like, we're not supposed to talk about that.
We're supposed to talk about the weather and whether or not your car's working or something. But I talk about those things and I think that storytelling allows me an avenue of permission to talk about these things with my audience because nobody ever feels talked down to and nobody ever feels bored. But also we don't ever skimp on the research either. You are going to come away from...
my social media content. You're going to come away from my books. You're going to come away from whatever it is that I'm creating. Hopefully, that's the goal of not only being informed, but you're going to laugh along the way. You're going to realize that even though the night is dark and full of terrors, you can learn about it in a way that feels uplifting and hopeful.
A lot of times we engage with deep dark topics, loneliness, death, religion, politics, all of those kinds of things, and come away just feeling really depressed and hopeless. And who am I? I'm one person. I don't matter. And I think bringing it back to something that you all talk about, I think giving people a sense of purpose and a sense that this information isn't too much for you
You can learn it. You can learn a new thing. You can embrace a new thing. You can talk about the big scary stuff in life and your opinion on it, your involvement in it, even just your willingness to learn about it matters because you matter. You as a cog in a machine, you as one of
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