Passion Struck with John R. Miles
Gretchen Rubin on the Secrets of Adulthood and Happiness | EP 604
29 Apr 2025
In this special live episode of Passion Struck, host John R. Miles welcomes New York Times bestselling author Gretchen Rubin to explore the timeless wisdom captured in her latest work, Secrets of Adulthood. Recorded at the vibrant Oxford Exchange in Tampa, Florida, this conversation dives deep into the small but powerful lessons that can transform the way we live, love, and grow.Gretchen Rubin, known for her groundbreaking books The Happiness Project and The Four Tendencies, shares why she believes Secrets of Adulthood is the book she has been writing in her mind for decades. Through a series of carefully crafted aphorisms—short, memorable phrases that distill big truths—Rubin captures what she has learned about human nature, habits, relationships, and personal growth. Her goal: to offer readers simple yet profound insights that illuminate the path to a happier, more intentional life.Click here for the full show notes: https://passionstruck.com/gretchen-rubin-on-the-secrets-of-adulthood/Join the Ignition Room!Join the new Passion Struck Community! - The Ignition Room: https://station.page/passionstruckKey Takeaways: Why Gretchen views aphorisms as a powerful literary tool How she shifted from "drift" to intentional living The surprising impact of losing two senses (taste and smell) after COVID The lessons Gretchen learned from Samuel Johnson about abstinence vs moderation Her advice on how adults can build and maintain meaningful friendships How to embrace paradoxes in love, parenting, and personal development The surprising truth about regret and decision-making Why Gretchen believes "a quest is more fun than a jaunt" For more information on Gretchen Rubin: https://gretchenrubin.com/Sponsors: Factor Meals: http://factormeals.com/factormeals50off and use code “FACTOR MEALS 50 OFF” Rosetta Stone: Unlock 25 languages for life at “ROSETTASTONE.com/passionstruck.” Prolon: Reset your health with 15% off at “ProlonLife.com/passionstruck.” Mint Mobile: Cut your wireless bill to 15 bucks a month at “MINT MOBILE dot com slash PASSION.” Hims: Start your journey to regrowing hair with Hims. Visit hims.com/PASSIONSTRUCK for your free online visit. Quince: Discover luxury at affordable prices with Quince. Enjoy free shipping and 365-day returns at quince.com/PASSION For more information on advertisers and promo codes, visit Passion Struck Deals.Speaking Engagements & WorkshopsAre you looking to inspire your team, organization, or audience to take intentional action in their lives and careers? I’m available for keynote speaking, workshops, and leadership training on topics such as intentional living, resilience, leadership, and personal growth. Let’s work together to create transformational change. Learn more at johnrmiles.com/speaking.Episode Starter PacksWith over 500 episodes, it can be overwhelming to know where to start. We’ve curated Episode Starter Packs based on key themes like leadership, mental health, and personal growth, making it easier for you to dive into the topics you care about. Check them out at passionstruck.com/starterpacks.Catch More of Passion Struck: My solo episode on The Mattering Mindset in Love – Choose the Love You Deserve Can't miss my episode with Jennifer B. Wallace on the Consequences of Prioritizing Achievements Over Mattering My episode with The Art of Listening: How to Make People Feel Like They Matter Catch my interview with Laurie Santos on How to Matter in a Busy World Listen to my solo episode on Fading into Insignificance: The Impact of Un-Mattering in Our Interconnected Era If you liked the show, please leave us a review—it only takes a moment and helps us reach more people! Don’t forget to include your Twitter or Instagram handle so we can thank you personally.How to Connect with John: Connect with John on Twitter at @John_RMiles Follow him on Instagram at @John_R_Miles Subscribe to our main YouTube Channel and to our YouTube Clips Channel For more insights and resources, visit John’s website Want to explore where you stand on the path to becoming Passion Struck? Take our 20-question quiz on Passionstruck.com and find out today!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Full Episode
Coming up next on Passion Struck.
Whatever it is that I'm dealing with my own life, I'm always like, okay, and I'll write a book about it and that's all figured out because I can't think if I'm not writing something down. And so that's definitely true for me. But the funny thing about this book is often when I'm writing a book, I have something called a hooky book, which is the book. It's like my busman's holiday. It's the book.
that I go work on when I'm like taking a break from what I'm actually supposed to be doing. Working is one of the most dangerous forms of procrastination but fortunately for me sometimes my hooky books actually get published. This was a hooky book, The Four Tendencies was a hooky book, Outer Order Inner Calm was a hooky book.
I wrote a book called My Color Pilgrimage because I went through this period of being absolutely preoccupied with color And I've shown it to a few people. I think it's really interesting, I have to say. And they're always like, well, you had fun with that, didn't you? So that may never see the light of day. So I have all kinds of oddball projects, some of which will come to have a life.
When I was working on this, I had a giant document of aphorisms. And some were secrets of adulthood in that they had some kind of useful thing to remind people when they're dealing with relationships or trying to get ourselves to do something or trying to know ourselves better. But then I have a lot that I would call just mere observations. This was me just noticing something.
The tulip is an empty flower. What is up with that? The tulip is an empty flower. I find them very unsatisfying. That is a mere observation. And then I also have a bunch of bleak aphorisms. I'm like, nobody wants Gretchen Rubin's bleak aphorisms. I'll leave those to the side. So these are really the ones that are useful.
Welcome to Passion Struck. Hi, I'm your host, John R. Miles, and on the show, we decipher the secrets, tips, and guidance of the world's most inspiring people and turn their wisdom into practical advice for you and those around you. Our mission is to help you unlock the power of intentionality so that you can become the best version of yourself.
If you're new to the show, I offer advice and answer listener questions on Fridays. We have long-form interviews the rest of the week with guests ranging from astronauts to authors, CEOs, creators, innovators, scientists, military leaders, visionaries, and athletes. Now, let's go out there and become Passion Struck. Welcome to Passion Struck episode 604.
Whether this is your first time tuning in, or you've been with us for a while, thank you for joining a movement that's all about defying limits, living with intention, and making what truly matters matter most. Now let me ask you something. What if the biggest breakthroughs in life aren't about chasing something new, but finally seeing what's been true all along?
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