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Smith and Sniff

OTOSOT 104

29 May 2026

Transcription

Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.

Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?

1.364 - 22.213 Richard Porter

I'm Richard Porter. I'm Johnny Smith. And this is On the Other Side of Things, the Smith & Sniff spin-off in which we answer your questions. It's a Friday, unless you're listening to this on a different day. So here we are, answering listeners' questions to hello at smithandsniff.com.

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Chapter 2: What are some of the funniest mangled car names you've heard?

22.433 - 51.756 Richard Porter

I was going to kick off with a very straightforward one from a listener called Nick, who says, Hello, you pair of ball joint dust covers that no longer prevent the ingress of dirt. so specific so mot tester centric as well yes um that's definitely mot terminology uh nick said i was training a guy the other day and a loud car went past he looked and said that's a fiat 500r broth

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51.736 - 59.285 Richard Porter

I nearly wet myself. His mangling off the mark. What's the worst mangling of a car name you've ever heard?

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59.926 - 84.418 Jonny Smith

Oh, gosh. There were two people that have recently referred to BMW Alpinas as Alpines. And it does really annoy me because you're like, no, you're crossing the streams now because that's an entirely other brand. Well, two other brands. It's obviously the audio equipment Alpine. And then you've got Alpine, who in British would be Alpine.

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85.019 - 92.894 Jonny Smith

So you're like, come on, the waters have become murky so quickly here. Just don't do it. Please don't do it.

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93.074 - 120.181 Richard Porter

My wife had a great one the other day. she, for some reason, was asking me about BYD. Yes. Chinese car manufacturer. Yes. But then, for some reason, she didn't, I presume then, she didn't think they were called BYD because she didn't say BYD. She said, what's going on with that Chinese car company? You know, what they call build your own.

121.303 - 123.525

And I was like, build your own? No.

123.505 - 148.804 Richard Porter

no not build i suppose the d does look a bit like an o and you know the cars used to say build your dreams on them before they realized that was shit and got rid of it but yes but yeah build your own i thought that's that's a different concept but she may be confusing it with bring your own where you have to take a bottle of wine to a restaurant of course blast your drains blast your drain blast your drains yeah and never put butter down the drains ever

149.324 - 151.927 Richard Porter

Oh, no, don't do that. Never do that. Or lard.

152.387 - 153.708 Jonny Smith

Don't put lard down there.

Chapter 3: Which is better for tight parking: Smart ForTwo or Toyota iQ?

795.399 - 801.387 Jonny Smith

I'm not proud of that. Goodness me. Anyway. That's a good one, though. I'm sure there's been some great prom vehicles.

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801.728 - 818.59 Richard Porter

Yeah, I bet. I mean, that's the thing. I don't know when it started becoming a thing here. It sort of feels like it's in the last 10, 15 years, maybe. Yeah, it has. I mean, it's definitely a 21st century phenomenon in this country. Prior to that, no. Leave us disco at most.

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819.07 - 849.435 Jonny Smith

Yes. Right. This is a letter from Tony. Hi, you pair of 4D gel number plates. On the way to Shedfest 2026 in my BMW E36 3 litre M3. Nice car, Tony. The driver's window wouldn't close fully when I shut the door due to a worn micro switch. Very annoying wind noise on the ride up. I had to think of a quick fix. Ah. The spare corn plaster I had for my little toe worked a treat.

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849.895 - 877.442 Jonny Smith

Peel the back off, stick it on the switch, sorted. It did remind me of my first car fix when I bought a, in brackets, Johnny, cover your ears, two-door yellow Hillman Avenger for £20 in 1987. I was 17-ish. £20? £20. That car would have been like 10 years old. And a two-door. One of the front leaf spring hangers was corroded, needing a repair.

877.722 - 898.729 Jonny Smith

Luckily, my mate had an arc welder, so we began to weld the corrosion. So the next day, when I rode to his house on my rally burner with my Blues Brothers shades on for my mate to open the door, looking like Eric Estrada from Chips, we had a brief conversation on why it felt like someone had poured sand in our eyes and we should have worn a mask. Oh no, arc eye.

898.709 - 924.325 Jonny Smith

Anyway, we decided to tie the hanger with a rope instead, bonnet up around the slam panel. This lasted approximately five miles. When judging a right-hand bend, the passenger wheel decided to turn right. Oh dear, the scrap man picked it up and gave me 25 quid. I was a fiver up on what I'd paid for the car. Any quick fixes that you guys have ever done or seen that haven't quite worked?

924.786 - 936.651 Jonny Smith

Cheers, Tony Evans, head of quality control at Land Rover. Only joking, I'm a bin man. I don't know if he is a bin man either. There's so much to unpack here, isn't there?

936.671 - 946.267 Richard Porter

There's an awful lot. I mean, he decides that the trying to tie the broken hanger to the crossman.

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