Something Heavy: A Memoir on Childhood Trauma and Complex PTSD
Episodes
Chapter 25: CPTSD and Compliments
05 Apr 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Hello world... This chapter is about my life with CPTSD and receiving, or rejecting, compliments in life.
Parental Figures Part 2
29 Mar 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Hello world... This epsiode is a follow up on a previous epsiode of gaining parental figures through life and giving them their flowers.
Chapter 24: Curiosity
23 Mar 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Hello world.... This week's chapter is all about curiosity, or lack therof, in friendships/relationships and how it stems from Complex PTSD.
Chapter 23: Shame
15 Mar 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Hello world... This chapter was a rough discussion about the shame cycle after a rough week of spiraling from it.
Chapter 22: Acknowledgement
08 Mar 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Hello world... This episode I dive into how a lack of acknowledgment into issues with family, friends and relationships comes off to me as incredibly ...
Chapter 21: ADHD
01 Mar 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Hello World... This epsiode is a brief glimpse into how ADHD has affected my life.
Q&A: The Sequel
23 Feb 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Hello world... This episode I decided to dive back into the mailbag and give the answers to questions you all have after listening to the podcast.
Chapter 20: Waiting for the Other Shoe to Drop
16 Feb 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Hello world... This episode is me diving into my pattern/belief that the proverbial other shoe is always going to drop, and how it doesn't allow me to...
Chapter 19: Boundaries and Needs
08 Feb 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Hello world... This chapter is about what boundaries and needs are and how they effect my life by not being the best to set and enforce them.
Q & A: Part 1
01 Feb 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Hello World.... You have questions, I have answers... Well I try to have them. This episode is part 1 of a Q&A series after getting a lot of feedb...
Chapter 18: Happy Birthday
25 Jan 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Hello World.... This chapter/episode I discuss why I am not the biggest fan of celebrating my birthday.
Chapter 17: People Pleasing
18 Jan 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Hello World.... This chapter/episode dives into my survival pattern of people pleasing and how that affects my personal life with friendships and rela...
Chapter 16: Parenting your Parents
11 Jan 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Hello World.... This chapter/episode dives in to the role I've always had with my parents, and how I've gone out of my way to parent them.
Chapter 15: Denial and Minimization
05 Jan 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Hello World.... This chapter/episode discusses my pattern of denying or minimizing parts of my childhood trauma and how I am learning to heal from it.
2025 Year in Review
28 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Hello world... This episode is a 2025 year in review. Start my mental health journey last December it felt fitting to give a review of all the good, b...
Chapter 14: Manuevering through the Holidays
22 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Hello world, Tobey here... This chapter/episode is how I handle the holiday season for the last 15+ years with family and friends.
Chapter 13: Never asking for help
15 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Hello world, Tobey here... This chapter/episode is a brief amount on some of the symptoms I have with C-PTSD and how it effects me.
Chapter 12: Parental Figures part 1
08 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Hello world, Tobey here... This chapter/episode is part 1 of giving credit to some of the parental figures I've gained in my life.
Chapter 11: Letting go of Friendships
01 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Hello world, Tobey here... This chapter/episode is about my realization that some friendships aren't worth keeping when there's year of data showing t...
Chapter 10: The 4 F's of CPTSD
24 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Hello world, Tobey here... This chapter/episode is about the 4 F's (Fight, Flight, Freeze, Fawn) of Completex PTSD and my experience with each one.
Chapter 9: Thank you, Dad
16 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Hello world, Tobey here... This chapter/episode is about the yearly feeling I get around the time of my Dad's passing and how it eats at me for reason...
Chapter 8: Familiarity vs Safety part 1
10 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Hello world, Tobey here... This chapter/episode is the first of many parts of me exploring the difference between familiarity and safety
Chapter 7: Empathizing with Myself
02 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Recorded 08/2025Hello world, Tobey here... This chapter/episode is a follow-up after meeting with my sister. Her empathy for our Mom made me reflect o...
Chapter 6: Oversharing
26 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Hello world, Tobey here... This Chapter/Episode is about the concerns I have with sharing my story, the pattern of oversharing my story to people who ...
Chapter 5: Competing with my Sister
19 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Hello world, Tobey here... This Chapter/Episode is about my relationship, or lack therof, with my sister. Talking about our first times discussing our...
Chapter 4: Wrestling with the inner child
12 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Hello world, Tobey here... This Chapter/Episode is about a weekend I had attending a giant wrestling show with the bros, how much it meant to me and h...
Chapter 3: Broken Family Bonds
05 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
recorded 7/12/25Hello world, Tobey here... This Chapter/Episode is about being let down by family members as a youth.Hope you enjoy and excited to hea...
Chapter 2: Workaholic
28 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Recorded 07/2025Hello world, Tobey here... This Chapter/Episode is a dive into why I feel the need to work multiple jobs to the detriment of my mental...
Chapter 1: Diagnosed with Complex PTSD
21 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Recorded 07/2025Hello world, Tobey here... This Chapter/Episode is the reason why I'm doing this podcast and my experience being diagosed with Complex...
Prologue: Tobey starts the healing journey
14 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Hello world, Tobey here... It's finally time to start uploading these podcasts on a public forum.This episode is very loose with no structure, but a "...