Tell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating
Episodes
123. Infidelity as Ambiguous Grief
07 Apr 2026
Contributed by Lukas
When you get chumped, why don't people bring casseroles? In this episode Tracy and Sarah discuss the complicated "ambiguous" grief of infidelity. Ther...
122. Chump Lady Answers Your Voicemails
31 Mar 2026
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, Tracy responds to your miscellaneous voicemails. A caller wishes to "put the final nail in the coffin" on the argument that infidelit...
121. Yet More Stupid Things Affair Partners Say
24 Mar 2026
Contributed by Lukas
There was so much stupid, enough to make a second podcast of submissions. All the dimwitted things people in affairs say to chumps. We can't make sens...
120. Stupid Things Affair Partners Say
17 Mar 2026
Contributed by Lukas
We asked, you answered with the dumbest, most self-serving, ridiculous things affair partners say to chumps. How can you come between them? He...
119. Are the Kids Okay? When Cheaters Abandon
10 Mar 2026
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode Sarah and Tracy discuss what happens when parents cancel their subscriptions to adulting and check out for affairs. We hear from liste...
118. When Cheaters Tell You How Much They Hate Cheating
03 Mar 2026
Contributed by Lukas
If you're a cheater who disavows cheating, are you suffering from cognitive dissonance? Or are you skilled in the dark arts of manipulation? Perhaps i...
117. Your Cheater's Most Pathetic Attempts to Win You Back
24 Feb 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Inspired by the Olympic skier who took the opportunity of his medal win to plead for his girlfriend to take him back after cheating on her, we share y...
116. The Most Self-Pitying Messages from Cheaters
17 Feb 2026
Contributed by Lukas
It's a common manipulation tactic for unfaithful partners to lead with self pity. Hey, their infidelity was hard on them too. Actually, harder really....
115. Sane Parenting: An Interview with Kirk Martin
10 Feb 2026
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, Tracy talks with Kirk Martin, the creator of the Calm Parenting podcast which covers the power struggles between kids and parents and...
114. A Tribute to Sylvia, Sarah's Mum
03 Feb 2026
Contributed by Lukas
When Sarah's then-husband walked out for his affair partner, her mother was her rock for the next 14 years. She helped Sarah raise the children, and w...
113. Are Mistresses Unfairly Shamed?
27 Jan 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Tracy and Sarah react to a letter at ChumpLady.com from a mistress asking Tracy to please inform her boyfriend's wife about their affair. (That was a ...
112. 'If You Must Go, I Wish You Triplets': An Interview with Virginia DeLuca
20 Jan 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Tracy talks with therapist, Virginia DeLuca, author of "If You Must Go, I Wish You Triplets," a candid, funny, and emotionally rich memoir about divor...
111. Discovering Your Cheater's Selfies
13 Jan 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Sarah and I are back after our hiatus to discuss your ex's cringey selfies. The fish. The dick pics. The ones where you're cropped out. If you ever st...
110. Your Terrible In-law Stories
16 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Sometimes the fuckwit doesn't fall far from the tree. In this episode we hear your terrible inlaw stories. The mother-in-law who asks what you did to ...
109. Holiday D-Days Anyone?
09 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
It's that time of year when it's hard for cheaters to maintain their double lives. Consequently, a lot of newly minted chumps are having D-Days during...
108. Why Women's Pain Matters -- Tracy and the Happy Hausfrau Discuss the Epstein Scandal
02 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Rep. Clay Higgins of Louisiana voted not to release the Epstein files. He was the only dissenting vote. Reportedly, he also owes over $140,000 in back...
107. Things You Will Not Miss About Your Ex
19 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
The holidays are coming and it's a good time to remember all the things you do not (or will not) miss about your cheating ex. We hear about puppets in...
106. Cruelty by Nature: An Interview with Dr. Peter Salerno
11 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
We're back with Dr. Peter Salerno this week talking about his new book "Cruelty By Nature: The Science of Intentional Abuse." If you've been at the re...
105. A Story of Actual Sister Wives and Other Polyamory Flops
04 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Tracy and Sarah react to your polyamory experiments. The open marriage stories keep coming... In this episode we hear about a man with two sister wive...
104. Your Open Marriage Proposition Stories
28 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
We asked listeners if they'd been propositioned by their partner to be in an open relationship, only to find they were being cheated on. The polyamory...
103. Worst Exits Ever
21 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode we asked listeners for their Worst Exits Ever stories. The cheaters who abandoned the family at Christmas. Or during a health crisis. ...
102. Life-Saving Divorce: An Interview with Gretchen Baskerville
14 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Tracy interviews Gretchen Baskerville author of the book and blog "Life-Saving Divorce." Gretchen has been a visible critic of the "Reconciliation Ind...
101. Open Marriage Skepticism
07 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
A recent news article discussed the increase in popularity of polyamory as an option on dating sites, while contrasting it with real life TV sh...
100. Could Your Cheater Have a Personality Disorder? An Interview with Dr. Peter Salerno
09 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Tracy talks with pyschologist Dr. Peter Salerno about the intersection of infidelity and personality disorders. A lot of conventional therapy assumes ...
99. How Do You Define Cheating?
26 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Chump Nation came up in an NPR discussion about how to define cheating. Unfortunately, the commentators seemed to have no lived experience or deep sun...
98. How to Handle It When Your Kids Get Cheated On
19 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
What happens when you discover your teen or adult child has been cheated on? Do your kids navigate this better if you modeled good boundaries? Or is t...
97. How Was Your Cheater Exposed?
12 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Sarah and Tracy hear from listeners about how their cheaters' affairs were exposed. (None of them by Jumbotron, alas.) Some affair partners outed the ...
96. When Affair Partners Marry
05 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Guest cohost Jenny aka The Happy Hausfrau blogger and Tracy discuss the Bezo wedding extravangaza and what happens when affair partners marry. We hear...
95. Coldplay Cheater Schadenfreude
29 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
It's the biggest cheating scandal of the year -- former Astronomer CEO Andy Byron and his subordinate HR Chief Kristin Cabot caught mid-canoodle by a ...
94. Are AI Girlfriends Cheating? The ChatGPT Schmoopie
22 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Guest co-host Jenny aka the Happy Hausfrau blogger and Tracy snark about the guy who proposed marriage to his ChatGPT girlfriend, but not his live-in ...
93. Crazy Cheater Reactions to Being Caught
08 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
You never know what kind of reaction you'll get when you confront a cheater. On the one hand are the stone cold freaks with no adaptive anxiety. They ...
92. What Else Didn't You Know About?
24 Jun 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Besides the cheating, what else didn't you know about? Listeners tell us the details of their cheaters double lives beyond the sex. The missing monies...
91. Reconciliation and the Dave Grohl Baby Mama Drama
17 Jun 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode Tracy gives her take on the news that Dave Grohl and his wife Jordyn Blum have decided to reconcile. While Grohl simultaneously has co...
90. Her Husband Swears He Isn't Gay, He Just Cheats with Men
10 Jun 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Tracy and Sarah respond to a listener's dilemma about her husband. He's cheating with men, but swears he's not gay. She's trying to get him into sex a...
89. Should You Tell the Children About the Affair?
03 Jun 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, we react to an atrocious column in the New York Times by therapist Lori Gottlieb, where a woman asks if she should be honest with her...
88. Stupid Cheater Life Plans
28 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Did you thwart a cheater's happiness? Are you the obstacle to their greatness? In this episode Tracy and Sarah explore stupid cheater life plans. The ...
87. Worst Reconciliation Advice You Got
20 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
If you just discovered your partner cheating, chances are you got some common reconciliaton advice like "Wait 6 months before you make a decision." Or...
86. Stop Labeling Partners of Sex Addicts "Codependent" - An Interview with Diane Strickland
13 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In this re-edited interview, we talk with trauma specialist Diane Strickland and creator of the site yourstoryissafehere.com about sex addiction and p...
85. Sexually Deceptive People -- An Interview with Dr. Omar Minwalla
06 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In this re-edited version of an earlier recording, Sarah and Tracy spoke with Dr. Omar Minwalla, a therapist who is known for his work "The Secret Sex...
84. Affair Proofing Your Marriage and Andrew G. Marshall
29 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In this re-edited version of an early broadcast, Tracy and Sarah challenge therapist Andrew G. Marshall on his promise that marriages can be affair-pr...
83. The Weirdest Things Cheaters Wanted in the Divorce or Breakup
22 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode we hear about all the imponderable things cheaters wanted in the breakup. Not real estate, or children, or sentimental items. But...
82. The Jesus Cheater Who Thought She'd "Fight" for Him
18 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In this short episode, Tracy and Sarah respond to a letter from a woman who's husband was astounded that after decades of marriage she left him. He wa...
81. Who Was Your Infidelity Angel?
08 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Keeping on the theme of good people, we asked listeners who helped them get through infidelity? Who was their guiding angel? A stranger, family member...
80. Random Acts of Kindness
01 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
We asked listeners -- what random act of kindness moved you after you were chumped? Tracy tells about her mysterious breakfast benefactor and Sarah sh...
79. Does My Husband Have Another Wife?
24 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Tracy and Sarah answer your letters including one from a woman who discovered her husband was telling people online that she was dead and referred to ...
78. F*ckwits of the Week
18 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This week we asked what your FWs were up to. Of course, the goal is meh, but some of us are still coparenting, or in the midst of divorce, or news...
77. Mind Movies and Rumination After Infidelity
11 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Part of the trauma after infidelity is rumination. The endless mind movies reliving what you know and, worse, imagining what you don't. In this episod...
76. Aunties on the Bench: Advice from Chumps to the Newly Betrayed
18 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
What advice would you give a new chump knowning what you know now? We heard from many listeners who had hard-won advice for the newly betrayed. How to...
75. Cheater Non-Apology Apologies
11 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
"I'm sorry, but you didn't like octopus," is among the more ridiculous apologies a cheater has given for being unfaithful. In this episode, Tracy and ...
74. How to Be a Supportive Friend to Someone Who Was Cheated On
04 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Sarah and Tracy answer a letter from a listener wondering how she can be a supportive friend to someone who is in an abusive marriage with a cheater. ...
73. Coercive Controllers -- An Interview with Dr. Emma Katz
28 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Tracy talks with domestic violence researcher Dr. Emma Katz about her book, "Coercive Control in Children's and Mothers' Lives." Many recognize violen...
72. She's 7 Months Pregnant and Caught Her Husband Sexting
21 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Sarah and Tracy respond to a letter from a woman who discovered her husband is sexting and on dating site while she is 7 months pregnant. She thinks h...
71. Why Can't I Leave Him?
02 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Tracy responds to a woman, Beth, who writes in to say she can't seem to leave her partner even though she's deeply unhappy. She has shady, circumstant...
70. Holiday Traditions You Don't Miss
31 Dec 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Sarah and Tracy learn what holiday traditions you don't miss from your cheating exes. From obnoxious mother-in-law gifted decor, to the ex who threw a...
69. Stupid Things People Say When You've Been Cheated On
24 Dec 2024
Contributed by Lukas
People say the most insensitive things when they learn you've been cheated on. Everything from the cliched "It takes two to tango" or "No one knows wh...
68. Holiday Cheater Stories
17 Dec 2024
Contributed by Lukas
It's time again for your holiday cheater stories. The terrible gifts, the discoveries, the yuletide double lives... Tracy and Sarah react to your FW t...
67. The Unknowing Other Woman and Her Child
10 Dec 2024
Contributed by Lukas
A listener calls in to discuss being an unknowing Other Woman. Her cheater had three other families, as it turns out, including her child. She asks fo...
66. Gender Bias in Family Court: An Interview with Dr. Christine Cocchiola and Amy Polacko
03 Dec 2024
Contributed by Lukas
In this interview with therapist Dr. Christine Cocchiola and investigative journalist Amy Polacko we discuss gender bias in family court. Both women h...
65. The Widow's Guide to Dead Bastards: An Interview with Jessica Waite
26 Nov 2024
Contributed by Lukas
After Jessica Waite's husband suddenly died of a heart attack, she discovered the extent of his double life -- long-term affairs, prostitutes, debt an...
64. 10 Ways to Cope When Jerks Win
19 Nov 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Tracy, as Chump Lady, has made quite a study of overcoming oppressive jerks. In this recorded pep talk, she expands on a recent blog post she wrote on...
63. What Did You Replace Your Cheater With?
12 Nov 2024
Contributed by Lukas
A woman writes to say she swapped her cheating husband for a Roomba. Her new appliance vacuums, never gaslights her, and comes back to its home port e...
62. How Did You Discover the Cheating?
29 Oct 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Listeners discuss how they discovered their partners were cheating. From putting spy apps on a phone, to the idiot who forgot the Ring camera was reco...
61. 'Cheating Is Abuse,' An Interview with Nell Hudson
22 Oct 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Tracy talks with writer and actress Nell Hudson about her eight-year relationship with a man who had a double life -- which she discovered on their an...
60. What If You Can't Escape the Affair Partner?
15 Oct 2024
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, Sarah and Tracy react to a letter from a woman who lives in the same small town as her ex and the affair partner -- her former friend...
59. Red Flags of Cheating
08 Oct 2024
Contributed by Lukas
The furtive bathroom visits with the cell phone, strange moods, and bizzare accusations that you're cheating -- in this episode we look at all the red...
58. Did Anyone Get Pregnant During the Affair?
01 Oct 2024
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, we discuss the intersection of pregnancy and infidelity. The mistresses who got pregnant. The chumps who got cheated on while pregnan...
57. Who Else Did You Lose in the Divorce/Breakup?
24 Sep 2024
Contributed by Lukas
When you lost a cheater, who else did you lose in the breakup? People often think infidelity is just a private matter between a couple, and not a larg...
56. Should You Confront an Affair Partner?
17 Sep 2024
Contributed by Lukas
A woman writes in to Tracy and Sarah after suspecting that her best friend has been cheating with her now ex-husband. This friend has been cagey, unsu...
55. Cheating Tropes and How to Defang Them
10 Sep 2024
Contributed by Lukas
With the recent buzz about Chump Nation in the New Yorker and the Cut, Tracy takes on the haters. Consider it a teaching opportunity. Here's three com...
54. The Walls In Your House Will Sing
03 Sep 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Tracy talks with her 83-year old Aunt Joy about what it was like to divorce a cheater in the 1970s. A time when women couldn't get credit without thei...
53. Those Who Didn't 'Stay Together for the Children'
27 Aug 2024
Contributed by Lukas
We hear from listeners who didn't stay together for the children (or weren't able to, because one parent abandoned ship), and who raised children on t...
52. D-Day Two Months After the Wedding
20 Aug 2024
Contributed by Lukas
She got married two months ago, only to discover her new husband has been cheating with his colleague -- her friend. He wants to go to Italy with the ...
51. Stupid Things Cheaters Say, Part 2
13 Aug 2024
Contributed by Lukas
So many stupid things cheaters say, it warranted a second podcast of your submissions. The Other Woman who is "rooting" for the chump's marriage. The ...
50. Stupid Things Cheaters Say
06 Aug 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Cheaters say the darndest things. In this episode, Sarah and Tracy react to your Stupid Sh*t Cheaters Say submissions. The suggestion that you would l...
49. How Did You Pick Me Dance to Win a Cheater?
23 Jul 2024
Contributed by Lukas
How pretty did you pick me dance to win a cheater? Did you lose weight? Up your sex game? Spend less time with the children? Were you aware you were i...
48. Fesshole Cheater Confessions: An Interview with Rob Manuel
11 Jul 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Rob Manuel is the creator of the social media phenomenon FessHole, where people anonymously share their darkest, most mortifying secrets. In this epis...
47. A Cheater Asks for Advice
09 Jul 2024
Contributed by Lukas
A self-professed cheater leaves Sarah and Tracy a voicemail asking how he can make amends for being unfaithful. He doesn't wish to reconcile -- they'r...
46. Liars: An Interview with Sarah Manguso
02 Jul 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Sarah Manguso has written the ultimate chump novel: Liars. Jane is a woman who endures marriage to, and divorce from, a textbook fuckwit. It dramatize...
45. I Should've Left When...
25 Jun 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Was there a moment in your relationship, before you knew about the cheating, in which you look back and regret not leaving then? In this episode, list...
44. "It's Not the Sex, It's the Deception" - The Untold Stories of the Ashley Madison Documentary
18 Jun 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Jake and Christine saw an announcement on the Chump Lady site for people who were impacted by the Ashely Madison hack scandal. The were both filmed fo...
43. Sarah's Take on the Ashley Madison Netflix Documentary
11 Jun 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Following up from last week's episode, Sarah weighs in on her observations (and revulsions) on the Ashley Madison Neflix series. Is it possible this m...
42. What the Ashley Madison Netflix Document Gets Wrong
04 Jun 2024
Contributed by Lukas
The new Netflix docuseries on the Ashley Madison hack purports to look at the complexities around infidelity. Instead, it's the same old message about...
41. What Did They Do For the Affair Partner That They Didn't Do for You?
28 May 2024
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode we discuss how cheaters devalue their partners while simulataneously love bombing their affair partners. Listeners share stories of wh...
40. Worst Cheater Gifts
14 May 2024
Contributed by Lukas
A discounted chocolate Easter egg for a 13-year-old's birthday... weeks past Easter. American-flag themed polar fleece. The same gift the Other Woman ...
39. Cheated On and Stranded Overseas: The Expat Chump Experience
07 May 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Comedian Kat moved to the UK for love over 20 years ago. Then her husband left her for his old girlfriend -- who she thought was a family friend. The ...
38. One Moms Battle Divorcing a Narcissist: An Interview with Tina Swithin
30 Apr 2024
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode we talk with blogger/activist Tina Swithin of One Mom's Battle. Tina acted as her own attorney in a high-conflict custody battle that ...
37. What If You Forgive a Cheater and They Do It Again?
23 Apr 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Tracy and Sarah discuss the common, if depressing, problem of forgiveness and multiple D-Days. What does forgiveness mean? Is it essential to get over...
36. Schmoopie Karma Stories
16 Apr 2024
Contributed by Lukas
What happens when cheater true love goes splat? In this episode, we feature your Schmoopie stories of comeuppance and karmic reckonings. Like the tree...
35. Co-Parenting with the Other Woman
26 Mar 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Sarah and Tracy react to an article chiding mothers to get along with former affair partners, now wives, for the sake of the children. It goes beyond ...
34. Ask Chump Lady Anything
19 Mar 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Ever wonder about the life of an infidelity advice columnist? This episode is an Ask Chump Lady Anything where Tracy Schorn takes your questions. How ...
33. The Infidelity Professor and His SHICRET Nonsense
12 Mar 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Tracy and Sarah snark at the self-declared "Infidelity Professor" Albert Arnaiz, who wrote the book SHICRET: How to Be Unfaithful Without Getting Caug...
32. Kayden's Law: An Interview with Kathy Sherlock
05 Mar 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Kathy Sherlock had a protection from abuse order against her daughter Kayden's father Jeff Manusco, who had a history of violence and mental instabili...
31. The Nonsense of Cheating Makes Marriages Stronger
27 Feb 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Tracy and Sarah take apart a recent People magazine "love" story entitled Cheating Saved Our Marriage! It's a common reconciliation trope that survivi...
30. Kyle Walker's Baby Mama Drama
20 Feb 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Sarah and Tracy discuss the UK cheating scandal of footballer Kyle Walker and his -- oops! -- second child with his mistress Lauryn Goodman. Betrayed ...
29. Cheater Valentines, Bad Carnations, and Cheap Chocolate
13 Feb 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Welcome to a special Valentine's Day edition of Tell Me How You're Mighty! Sarah and Tracy discuss our worst Valentine's Days, smug coupledom, and a s...
28. Do You Need a Private Detective? An Interview with Kenneth D'Angelo of Target Investigations
06 Feb 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Worried someone might be cheating on you? Got a controlling partner and the feeling that you're under survelliance? Going through a messy divorce? You...
27. Spiritual Abuse and Infidelity: An Interview with David Derksen, the Divorce Minister
30 Jan 2024
Contributed by Lukas
It's hard to be cheated on. It's even harder when your faith community blames you for it or thinks divorce is a bigger sin than the cheating. In this ...
26. 10 Questions to Ask Your Unfaithful Spouse or Partner
23 Jan 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Sarah and Tracy respond to a recent Chump Lady post "10 Questions to Ask Your Unfaitfhul Spouse." Unlike a reconciliation article, these are actual qu...
25. 'A Wedding Ring Is Not a Diploma': An Interview with Shani Silver of a Single Revolution
16 Jan 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Shani Silver, TikToker, author of a Single Revolution, and the podcast A Single Serving, is a unique voice of support, shedding the societal shame a...
24. Holiday FW Special Edition
25 Dec 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Happy holidays! Sarah and Tracy take your recordings of the Worst Holidays Ever spent with fuckwits. A hooker named "Holly," passive-aggressive presen...