The Calm Confidence Podcast: Social Anxiety and Being Yourself
Episodes
Why You Can't Make Friends
01 Apr 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Making friends can be very hard, especially when you get older, and especially when you have social anxiety. In this episode I explore my own experien...
Introversion, Shyness or Social Anxiety?
23 Mar 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Are you introverted, shy or do you have social anxiety disorder? Thes are three terms that often get confused for one another but are actually very di...
How To Actually Not Care What Others Think
11 Mar 2026
Contributed by Lukas
I apologize for the background noise. It was beautiful out today so I recorded outside on my phone. I spent years trying to figure out how to not care...
Stop Doing This In Public If You Have Social Anxiety
04 Mar 2026
Contributed by Lukas
There's one thing we all do that is making our social lives worse... our phone. It has become so easy to lean on our phone as a crutch when we fee...
Stop Worrying About Other People's Feelings
21 Feb 2026
Contributed by Lukas
When we are socially anxious we become hyper aware of other people's feelings, and we make it our mission to ensure no one is ever upset with us. ...
How To Talk To Strangers
16 Feb 2026
Contributed by Lukas
The smallest interactions can consume us with anxiety. I know firsthand how a simple "hello" can turn the nervous system into hyperdrive. We...
Hating Yourself Into Self Respect
12 Feb 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Self Improvement has become as divided as American Politics. On one end we have people who believe we should accept ourselves no matter what. On the o...
The Excuses We Make
01 Feb 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Your social anxiety does not want to get better. It likes to feel safe and comfortable. Who can blame it, it's hard to challenge yourself when you...
The MOST DANGEROUS Mindset For Socially Anxious People
23 Jan 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Sometimes the things we think are protecting us are acting the things that are hurting us, and that is the case for social anxiety. Beliefs like "...
How Introverts Become Socially Anxious
16 Jan 2026
Contributed by Lukas
The world doesn't appreciate quiet people. When introverts are young, they are more than happy being alone. But then the people start telling them...
Talkin' Social Anxiety w/ Dr. Vincent Barbieri
08 Jan 2026
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode I discuss social anxiety with Dr. Vincent Barbieri. Dr. Barbieri and I graduated from the same high school, but barely knew each other...
Are You Just Faking It?
02 Jan 2026
Contributed by Lukas
"Fake it till you make it," they say, but does it actually work? Can you actually fake your confidence long enough that you will eventually ...
How To Stop Replaying Social Interactions
23 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Replaying social interaction and conversations is at the core of social anxiety. For many of us, the social situation itself is not the worst part of ...
How To Date With Social Anxiety
12 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Social anxiety makes everything harder, especially dating. When we are attracted to someone our anxious skyrockets and we become stumbling, bumbling f...
Drop Your Expectations
10 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Sorry it’s been a busy week and I haven’t had a chance to record a full episode. This is a short video I made a YouTube a few weeks ago that I for...
How Kindness Cured My Social Anxiety
03 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
When we are socially anxious for long enough, we start to become very cynical towards the world. We start to believe people are cruel and kindess is p...
You're Not Going To Want To Hear This
26 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This may be a difficult episode for some of you to hear, but you need to hear it. In this episode I explore how we allow social anxiety to sabotage ou...
The Core Fear of Social Anxiety... And How To Overcome It
17 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
For many of us, the scariest part of social anxiety is not simply talking to people, it is the fear that other people will soon find out just how anxi...
How To Keep A Conversation Going
09 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Here are 5 very practical ways to keep the conversation going when you don't know what to say. When we feel socially anxious we overcomplicate con...
How To Stop Being So Sensitive To Rejection
31 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Rejection stings, but it doesn't have to consume us. In this video I discuss how to overcome our fear of rejection and learn how to prevent the downwa...
2 Things You MUST Have To Overcome Social Anxiety
21 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Social anxiety can be a long battle, which is why you need patience and self compassion. Along the way will be struggles, embarrassing moments, uncomf...
You're Looking For Respect and Confidence in All The Wrong Places
13 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This was another older video from Youtube that I never uploaded.I spent a large portion of my life attempting to extract respect and confidence from o...
Turn Your Fear Into Motivation
08 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
The worst part of social anxiety is not necessarily the symptoms, it's the how much it robs us of our life. In this video I discuss the effects so...
The Biggest Mistake People With Social Anxiety Make
04 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This is another older youtube video I never uploaded to the podcast.In this episode, I explore what I think is the biggest mistake people with social ...
It's Your Life, Treat it That Way
02 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Another older video from youtube that I never uploaded to the podcast.We often fall off our path out of fear of judgment from others and we forget the...
Forgive Yourself For Mistakes You Made At Your Lowest
29 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This was a youtube video I uploaded back in February that I forgot to add to the podcast. At the end of the video I mention a follow up episode called...
You're Wrong About Yourself
24 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode I explore the role of negativity bias in social anxiety. We often believe we have an objective understanding of ourselves, when in rea...
How To Deal With Desperation
23 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This is the audio from a short video I made on YouTube. Social anxiety can also impact our relationships. It can make us worry about where we stand wi...
Don't Wait
19 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Social Anxiety makes us passive, but the more passive we are the less control we feel over our own lives. We hold onto narratives decades old because ...
THIS is NOT Helping Your Social Anxiety
17 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Alcohol, unfortunately, can be very good at calming our nerves. I say unfortunately because this can create a very dangerous cycle. If we rely on alco...
The Practical Way to End Self-Consciousness
13 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Self-consciousness prevents us from living and acting freely in the world. When we are in a social situation and we become self conscious it becomes n...
Why Your Social Anxiety Isn't Getting Better
11 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
PODCAST NAME CHANGE! THIS WAS FORMERLY THE "THERAPY ON TAP PODCAST."Sometimes it feels like no matter how many times we put ourselves in soc...
Playing it Safe is Dangerous
08 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
When we feel anxious in social situations, we play it safe. We don't tell the funny joke, we sit in the corner of the room, we don't share our...
Your Brain Froze During a Conversation, Now What?
14 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Every socially anxious person's nightmare... You're in a conversation, things seem to be going ok, when suddenly... your brain freezes. Now your heart...
The Paradox of Self Confidence
11 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Self confidence can be quite the Paradox. If you don't already have confidence, no amount of achievement will give it to you. This is because our low ...
What They Don't Tell You About WEED!
10 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Marijuana has become more accepted both culturally and legally, and on the whole this has been a good thing. However, I think we are being dishonest i...
It's Not Always Depression
08 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Depression isn't always an internal problem. Sometimes we are depressed because our life is simply not going well. Some of these reasons are out o...
You Are Making Your Social Anxiety Worse
06 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
You may not realize this, but by trying to "improve" your social skills, you are actually making your social anxiety worse. If you struggle ...
People Will Judge You No Matter What You Do
20 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
We can't avoid judgement from others, so don't bother trying. Our attempts to avoid it only make our social anxiety worse and it won't sto...
How to Boost Confidence by Doing Less
07 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
We're often taught that if we want to feel confident in something, we have to practice until we have mastered it. We believe that confidence comes...
Anxiety Can Crush Your Dreams
04 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Anxiety, and mental health in general, is a dream crusher. It prevents you from living a full life and makes you believe you have to put your life on ...
4 Things Overthinkers Must Stop Doing!
12 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Are you an overthinker? In this video I break 4 common mistakers overthinkers make, and how to overcome them! #overthinking #worry #rumination #anxiet...
Depression Changes You
10 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Depression will change you in ways you cannot even imagine. It's important we recognize the power of depression so we don't fall into the trap...
6 Oddly Specific Symptoms of Social Anxiety
09 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Social anxiety isn't just a fear of talking to others. In this video, I examine 6 oddly specific symptoms/signs of social anxiety that you may rel...
The 5 Ideas That Cured My Social Anxiety
09 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
I've battled with social anxiety for most of my life. Now older and wiser, I've reflected on the 5 main ideas/mindset changes that helped me b...
How Anger Can Help Your Social Anxiety
07 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Are you tired of being a people pleaser and constantly suppressing your emotions? In this video, we'll explore the connection between people-pleas...
Stop Putting Others On a Pedestal
04 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Do you ever find yourself struggling with social anxiety or feeling less confident when you're around others? You’re not alone, in this video we...
Goodbye to Self Consciousness
21 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Self consciousness is at the core of all of our social anxiety. We worry about how others perceive us and this prevents us from showing the world who ...
How To Get Out of Your GODDAMN Head!
17 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Do you struggle with worry and rumination? Welcome to the club. In this episode I discuss how you can get out of your head once and for all. THIS DOES...
Your Social Anxiety Is Not Your Personality
15 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Sometimes labeling and identifying a diagnosis can be helpful, but when we over-identify with a diagnosis, we box ourselves in. This is very common wi...
How to escape loneliness
14 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Loneliness is an isolating feeling despite the fact that WE ALL feel it. In this episode I discuss a different way to connect to others when you feel ...
It's OK to care what other people think
10 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
THIS DOES NOT COUNT AS THERAPY, PLEASE GO TO ACTUAL THERAPY. There's so much (bad) advice out there telling people they should stop caring what other ...
Therapists need to STOP doing THIS!
04 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
THIS DOES NOT COUNT AS THERAPY, PLEASE GO TO ACTUAL THERAPY. Sometimes as therapists we overanalyze things. Whether it's our own ego or our genuine th...
How to Get Over Your Fear of Public Speaking
26 Dec 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Public speaking is one of the most common fears known to man. However, as much as we like to avoid it, speaking publicly often plays a crucial role in...
How To Like Yourself
22 Dec 2024
Contributed by Lukas
THIS DOES NOT COUNT AS THERAPY, PLEASE GO TO ACTUAL THERAPY. We all want to like ourselves, but it's easier said than done. The reality however, is th...
You're Thinking About Your Thoughts All Wrong
13 Dec 2024
Contributed by Lukas
We like to think that it is our thoughts themselves that cause our pain and distress, but what if it is action the WAY we think about our thoughts? Th...
Annihilating Nihilism
14 Nov 2024
Contributed by Lukas
When we are depressed we can fall into a nihilistic philosophy. Existential nihilism is the philosophical belief that life has no meaning or purpose, ...
STOP EXTERNALIZING YOUR STRESS
08 Oct 2024
Contributed by Lukas
We all have a tendency to externalize our stress. When we feel stressed, we blame the thing or the world instead of looking inward. While this may hel...
Bipolar Disorder Vs. Borderline Personality Disorder
18 Sep 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Bipolar Disorder and Borderline Personality Disorder are very different, but are often confused for one another. They are also two of the more stigmat...
8 Things you should NOT DO if you have Social Anxiety
03 Sep 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Social Anxiety can truly prevent us from living the life we want to live. The fear can make us do things that may feel good or safe in the moment, but...
YOUR EMOTIONS ARE NOT ALWAYS VAILD
17 Aug 2024
Contributed by Lukas
We all want to feel validated, but we have to admit that sometimes our emotions are not always in alignment with reality. This can be a hard pill to s...
How to Overcome Panic Attacks
08 Aug 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Panic Attacks are the Worst! In this episode I explain what panic attacks are and how to best navigate them, so you can go back to living your life in...
Building Motivation When You Are Depressed
20 Jul 2024
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode I discuss how to build motivation when you are depressed. Take it slow and be kind to yourself.
The Anxiety Trap
08 Jul 2024
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode I talk about what I call the "anxiety trap." This is the pattern we fall into when we ruminate. We feel like the more we thi...