Chapter 1: What was the experience like at the bachelor party?
On this episode of the Commercial Break. I gotta skip a lot of it because, of course, you don't kiss and tell at a bachelor party, right? But there wasn't any, like, dancing girls or anything like that. We're all too old for that bullshit. And plus, in Maggie Valley, North Carolina, the options are limited. Let's put it that way. You settled for seeing some elk. Yes, we saw some elk.
And to a bunch of old guys, that was just as exciting as seeing tits. I mean... We're of a certain age, we've seen tits. You know what I'm saying? It's like, and the groom doesn't want it, we don't want it. And then just to have some strange girl and probably a guy sitting outside in a car, you know, the security guard or whatever. It's just a weird, it wasn't that kind of party.
Let's put it that way. Which is fine with me because I've been to, I've seen enough dancing girls in my life. I've dated enough dancing girls in my life. Yes, you have. I'm over it. The next episode of The Commercial Break starts now. Oh, yeah, cats and kittens, welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green. This is my dear friend and the co-host of this show, Chris and Joy Hoadley.
Best to you, Chrissy. Best to you, Brian. And happy birthday to you, Chrissy. Thank you. We didn't get a chance to say happy birthday because we didn't have a chance to jump in the studio last week, but happy birthday. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Chapter 2: What activities were planned for the bachelor party weekend?
What is he, 29 now? Yeah, holding. Holding. Thanks, thanks, Eddie. Yes, thank you so much. Stay on target. Stay on target. You don't look a day over 30, Chrissy. Don't look a day over 30. How do you keep that magnificent skin and that taut body of yours? Tell the world. Lots of oils and lotions and potions. Does Jeff help you with the oils? He does sometimes. Let's get into it.
Yeah, he does sometimes. We like our lotions and potions and oils. I do love me some Crisoli. Oh my God, that guy. What was that guy's name?
Chapter 3: How did the group react to seeing wildlife during the trip?
I can't remember after all those years. What was his name? No. What was his name? Hey, it's me from Podcast Universe. What was his name? I can't remember. All right, we'll remember. I'll go back to episode three and figure it out. Yeah, I think that's when he made an appearance. First season, for sure. Anyway, thanks for joining us in the streaming universe and the podcast universe.
Hey, Candle Kane. Candle Kane's always in there. Yes, she is. He or she. We don't know. We don't know. Is it he or she or they or them? I don't know. I don't want to be offensive. So anyway, happy birthday to you. Congratulations on yet another. You know, I got the world's kindest compliment today. I was in the Starbucks meeting my Starbucks boyfriend. Of course. As I do. Okay.
I have a boyfriend. His name is Lance and I love him.
Chapter 4: What was the atmosphere like at Harrah's Cherokee Casino?
And we love each other. And South Georgia Sean is in the house. Let me stop for a second and say I did read that it was South Georgia Sean's birthday. Sean, I'm sorry. He was on the phone. I didn't get back to him because I had a long weekend myself. Oh, it was his birthday too. Well, happy birthday to South Georgia Sean. It was his birthday also. I don't know when it was. Sometime last week.
But happy birthday, South Georgia Sean. I was in the Starbucks today doing my coffee boyfriend date, as I do. And one of the girls said it was her birthday last week. And I said, oh, well, congratulations. She said, I turned 35. I said, that's wonderful. And she goes, I've never asked, how old are you? And I go, oh, how old do you think I am? She goes, my age, 35, 36. I was like, yeah, that's it.
There you go. Done. Done. It's the best compliment I could receive all day. Mic drop. All right, I'm out. Thank you. It really put me in a good fucking mood this morning. I was like, hotty doody, hot dog. It's that tan skin. Yeah, it's that tan skin. It's going to make me look 80 when I'm 55. But that's okay. Stay on target. Stay on target. We need to catch up with your gym membership, too.
Oh, my gym membership. I've been to the gym a few times, and they continue to bug me. And it's really starting to irritate the piss out of me if I'm being honest.
Chapter 5: How did Boy George's performance impact the night?
What's that? Still? Yeah, they don't fucking let it go. I mean, I'll talk about it in a few minutes. But the guy, he just doesn't leave it alone. He doesn't leave it alone because I've now either avoided or ghosted him on three separate appointments. And now I think he sees it as a personal affront. Like a challenge. It's a challenge to try and get a personal fitness assessment with Brian.
But my personal fitness assessment is just to show up at the gym. That is my personal goal for 2026. I am winning by simply stepping in. By checking in, I have accomplished everything that I wanted to accomplish. I have no goals. I don't want to add a pound of strength. I don't want to make my bicep. I don't care. I just don't want to look like an old flabby man. That's it.
That's all I want to do. There you go. That's the assessment. Tighten and tone it just a little bit. I have no ass. I have flabby arms. You see me on those machines. I should be wearing long sleeves and long pants because you see me on those machines. I'm just a flab master. I'm like, my arms are all... I look like Popeye. I look like Popeye lost all his gumption. He maybe needs some spinach.
Maybe I do need some spinach. Listen, I saw the most interesting video the other day that said, it hypothesized, and then it backed that up with fact, that the creators of the cartoon Popeye used spinach as a metaphor, metaphorically, Meth. What? That spinach was meth. No. Yes, because he was in the, he was what? He was a Navy man, right? He was in the Navy.
Chapter 6: What unexpected events occurred during the casino visit?
Yeah. Okay, that's what Popeye had that big tattoo of that anchor. He was in the Navy. And this cartoon was written, we all remember Popeye and, you know, olive oil and blue dough and all that other stuff. They were... Doing a bunch of meth in the Navy?
They were giving meth to the Navy men, to the sailors, and to the pilots as far back as World War I. And in World War II, the Japanese, it was like their secret weapon. They would dope those kamikaze pilots up so fucking much and then tell them to go fly the plane right into the aircraft carriers. So this is not a secret. It is well documented, as the Germans were doing.
And the Americans were doing it, too. It's just not as well documented. But it is documented that they were doing this. And so I believe that Popeye is a World War I character. I think he was around, like, back in the 30s or 40s. But there's this whole video. I get fucking caught up in these fucking videos. Yes, you do. Who fucking cares?
I'm watching how Popeye might have been taking meth instead of spinach. And I'm so fascinated by it. It's information that is completely fucking useless. As if there's nothing better to do with my time than to figure out whether Popeye, spinach was a metaphor for fucking meth. It is interesting, though. It is interesting. I'll tell you what is a metaphor for meth.
Harrah's Cherokee Casino is a metaphor for meth. That's what it is. Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. Had my brother's bachelor party this weekend. And it was a fascinating series of events, most of which I can't get into. Yeah, I've been very excited about hearing some of these stories. It is a bunch of high school friends that had a moment in the sun.
There was a hot tub outside, and at one moment, at one moment in time, I firmly believe we were inside the movie Hot Tub Time Machine. Oh, Hot Tub Time Machine. That we had all traveled back to 16-year-old selves, and we were having a moment in the sun. That's fun. Sure. Sure. The same substances, the same amount of inebriation, the same people around you.
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Chapter 7: What was the food experience like at Guy Fieri's restaurant?
Well, you even had a former member of 33P there with you. 33P, Mike Skirsky, which I'll give him a shout out. We called him Scooter. Scooter was his name. Scooter was a phenomenal drummer, and he was our drummer in 33P. So Mike and I spent hours going back over all of the moments, which were like three. Yeah. About 33 penis. And it was fun. It was good to know.
But I got to skip a lot of it because, of course, you don't kiss and tell at the bachelor party, right? But there wasn't any, like, dancing girls or anything like that. We're all too old for that bullshit. And plus, in Maggie Valley, North Carolina... The options are limited. Let's put it that way. He settled for seeing some elk. Yes, we saw some elk.
And to a bunch of old guys, that was just as exciting as seeing tits. I mean, we're of a certain age, we've seen tits. You know what I'm saying? It's like, and the groom doesn't want it, we don't want it. And then just to have some strange girl and probably a guy sitting outside in a car, you know, the security guard or whatever. It's just a weird, it wasn't that kind of party.
Let's put it that way. Which is fine with me because I've been to, I've seen enough dancing girls in my life. I've dated enough dancing girls in my life. Yes, you have. I'm over it. Yeah, it was just a big get-together. Yeah, strippers were never really my thing anyway, unless I was dating them. But it wasn't really my thing. Anyway, whatever, cares.
Okay, so we go to Harrah's Cherokee Casino in Maggie Valley, North Carolina, which is a huge facility that rises up out of the ground in the valley of a mountain. It is unbelievable. There is nothing anywhere. And then all of this, you were riding on these mountain roads that are crazy, windy, twisty, turny, and then all of a sudden, boom. This building rises up.
Yeah, it's like a phoenix rising from the ashes.
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Chapter 8: How did the night conclude with memorable moments?
It is amazing. It is huge. Not as big as the Vegas casinos, but not small by any stretch of the imagination. It's a really large facility. And it was packed. I'll explain why. World Series of Poker. Oh, okay. And Boy George was playing live at Harris Cherokee Casino. That's right. Okay. Unbelievable. He's on the casino circuit. Yeah. God bless him. And as as and in the middle of dinner.
OK, let me tell you. So we get to I'm driving. You know, I'm I'm not I don't usually at least not at this part of my life. I'll get back to it in my 60s or 70s. I don't partake in a lot of substances. Yes. So I said, hey, guys, I'll drive. That'll be my contribution to the group. I'll drive as many as I can get in there. There's about 10 of us, five of us get in my car.
I drive down these crazy roads. Thank God I wasn't drinking because this was an insane road to drive up and down. Those mountain roads can be crazy. It was intense. And had you not really been paying attention, I could see how you could get in trouble real quick. And gosh, you guys were going to be, I mean, there was all that blizzard and storm stuff going on, but I guess it didn't reach there.
Not when we were there. It might have snowed up there. It was snowing actually when I left on Sunday morning, but it was snowing. It wasn't like sticking on the ground. It was just snow. Anyway, so we get to Harrah's, dinner at nine o'clock. We get there at about 730. This is on Saturday night. Friday night, everyone hit it really fucking hard. I mean, really fucking hard.
That's what you do on that first night when you're all back together again. Absolutely. Everyone's going golfing at 11, but no one seems to understand that there's a clock and it keeps moving. And no matter what you do, you're going to have to show up. And these guys are like, they're hell-bent on going golfing. Me, I'm a take it or leave it kind of guy.
If I'm hungover and I don't want to golf, I don't go golf. Some people in the group, it doesn't matter how hungover they are, they want to go golf. Yeah, they're making it. It's like the cure for hangover, but there's nothing about being out in the cold, wet, damp...
in the middle of nowhere for four and a half fucking hours driving on a golf cart that makes it even colder than it already is that seems interesting to me when I'm hungover yeah and you guys had a big group too ten ten of us that's a lot of people to get through three of us stayed back at the right okay I stayed in the morphs I was good with that in the hot tub cool yeah and I wasn't even hungover but I wasn't planning on golfing anyway so anyway okay so we get to Harrah's nine o'clock dinner we leave at seven we get there at seven thirty so we have an hour and a half to kill
Harrah's Cherokee Casino. No offense to anybody involved in Harrah's. It is the Walmart of casinos. That is the best way to explain it. It is the every man, every day, super discount. Go get your gambling on. Go get your gambling on. No matter your fit or fashion, you're welcome at Harrah's. And man, does it take all kinds. I will explain to you. That's why they're making so much money.
They are killing it. Oh, yeah. It was absolutely packed. They have a 12-story, 10-story, 12-story parking deck. I had to park on the very top. Oh, my God. On the very top. That's where I had to park. On Saturday night at the casino. Saturday night. And, bonjour. Boy George and the World Series of Poker. They're both going on there, right? Okay. So we get there. We park.
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