Episode 30: Life on Your Own Terms Being self-centered isn’t selfish. It’s the ultimate power move! It’s time to put yourself first in a way that’s empowering, not egotistical. In this episode, Hilary redefines what it means to be self-centered and why it’s the key to living life on your own terms. At 52, she’s thriving in her health, relationships, business—literally every area of her life—and she’s here to show you how you can do it too. Episode Highlights: Forget the lie that “the world doesn’t revolve around you.” Hilary explains why embracing your role as the center of your world changes everything. Self-prioritization is survival. Hilary talks about how putting yourself first creates the safety and stability to truly thrive. Own your stuff! Hilary challenges listeners to take radical responsibility for their lives because when you’re the problem, you’re also the solution. Enough with the self-sacrifice. Hilary debunks the myth that putting others first makes you “virtuous” and reveals why boundaries and self-respect are non-negotiable. Success is about how you feel showing up as your most authentic self. Episode Breakdown: [00:00] Redefining “Self-Centered” [00:41] The Five Core Concepts Overview [01:47] Prioritizing Your Relationship with Yourself [02:08] Authenticity and Living in Alignment [02:41] Core Concept 1: You Are the Center of Your Universe [03:45] Core Concept 2: You Come First and You Go First [05:20] Core Concept 3: You Are Both the Problem and the Solution [07:17] Core Concept 4: It’s Not Noble to Be Selfless [09:56] Core Concept 5: The Outcome Is Internal [12:04] Final Thoughts Don’t wait—hit play, and start living unapologetically self-centered today! Unlock lasting confidence with Hilary’s free, game-changing resources https://hilarysilver.com/guides/
Chapter 1: What does it mean to be self-centered?
The word self-centered is often associated with selfishness, narcissism, or being full of yourself. But in my world, being self-centered means something else entirely, and it's a good thing. In fact, it's a prerequisite for being your best self, living your best life, and getting anything you want. At 52, I feel more at peace with myself than ever before. I'm in the best shape of my life.
Chapter 2: How can prioritizing yourself change your life?
I'm running a multi eight figure business and I have an amazing family life. I'm living life on my own terms and loving every bit of it. And I want that for you. I want it for all of us because it just feels amazing. So today I'm breaking down what it really means to be self-centered. and I'm sharing the five core concepts of living a self-centered life.
Chapter 3: What are the five core concepts of a self-centered life?
And stick around till the very end because you'll want to understand all of the core concepts together. One without the rest isn't nearly as effective and powerful. Hi, it's Hillary. Welcome to the Hillary Silver Podcast. Thanks for tuning into the conversation today.
Chapter 4: Why is authenticity important in self-centered living?
If you haven't already, it would mean so much to me if you'd take a minute to just click that five-star rating on your podcast app, leave a review, and subscribe so you never miss one of my episodes. And if you're enjoying this podcast, please consider sharing it with a friend because if you like it, they will probably like it too.
Chapter 5: How does being the center of your universe empower you?
Being self-centered in the way I teach it is not about thinking that you're better than everyone else, and it's not about thinking that you're above reproach. It's about being fully centered in yourself, prioritizing the relationship you have with yourself. It's holding sacred your relationship with you, which is the most important relationship in your life.
Chapter 6: Why is it crucial to come first in your life?
Being self-centered ensures that you're living completely authentically, being true to yourself always, and making choices or decisions that are in alignment with your own values. When you do this, you are the best version of yourself for you, and then you can show up this way for everyone else too.
Chapter 7: How can taking responsibility lead to solutions?
And I really believe that living a self-centered life is the solution to all of our modern epidemics of anxiety, loneliness, even obesity and opioids. I know it's a big promise to make and it sounds grandiose, but it's actually quite simple. And once I explain, you'll see why. So there are five core concepts to living a self-centered life.
Chapter 8: What is the relationship between self-prioritization and well-being?
Core concept number one, you are the center of your own universe. You may have heard people say throughout the years growing up, the world doesn't revolve around you. But I honestly believe that is one of the biggest lies that we've been conditioned to believe because the truth is, yes, your world does revolve around you. Of course it does.
You are the center of everything in your universe, just as I am the center of mine. There is a direct line and connection between who I am and everything in my life, my relationships, my work, my health, my lifestyle, my finances, all of it. Who I am goes with me into each area of my life and determines the quality of those parts of my life.
That is how important I am in my life, how important you are in your life. That is how much power we have to create the exact life that we desire. The impact that you have is far reaching because everything in your world responds to how you are showing up. So yes, the world, your world does revolve around you. Core concept number two, in your life, you come first and you go first.
So let's talk about you come first first. This is more than self-care and putting on your own oxygen mask first platitudes. It's deeper than that. You coming first in your life allows you to have a rock solid, unshakable relationship with yourself. This means you never waver. You always get your own back. You trust yourself to do what you need to do to take care of you first.
This self-prioritization provides you essential emotional and even physical safety and security. which of course we all need for our own wellbeing. So here's what this looks like in real life. You'll never put yourself in a situation or stay in a situation that is not good for you, whether it's just uncomfortable or unsafe, because you don't feel obligated to other people.
You won't compromise yourself and what matters to you because you know that you will prioritize yourself. You won't allow yourself to be treated poorly or expose yourself to drama or toxicity just to keep the peace or make other people happy. You make sure your needs, wants, feelings, and desires are considered first, because in your life, you matter most.
You are responsible for creating your own safety in this world, and this is how you do it. Going first means taking the lead. If there's something that you want to change or achieve, it starts with you. For example, If you often feel unappreciated or taken advantage of, it starts by looking at how you value yourself and how you are potentially overgiving in ways.
I tell my Ready for Love clients, if you want a man to make you a priority, you have to be a woman who makes herself a priority first. Your relationship with you is the model. You go first and then everything else follows. Core concept number three, you are always both the problem and the solution.
When you become truly self-centered, you recognize that everything in your life is a reflection of your choices and your mindset. You are the common denominator in all things in your life, So if you're experiencing disappointment or dissatisfaction, look no further than the mirror. And I know that's hard to take. I call it the bitter pill, but it's also the magic pill all at once.
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