Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
Welcome back to Pump and Joe. Happy New Year to everybody. Talking about the year in Pittsburgh sports, but what about the year ahead? What about the year ahead, oh dear, Nelly?
Chapter 2: What reflections on Pittsburgh sports are shared for the past year?
How about a resolution? I don't know. There's a difference between a resolution and a wish. Right? There's wishes that I have for every Pittsburgh sports team. And then there's resolutions that each should have. The Pirates need to be resolute in getting one more bat. They need a third baseman.
Chapter 3: What resolutions do the hosts suggest for Pittsburgh sports teams?
That should be their resolution. Finish the job. That should be their theme. You know how people get certain themes to their New Year's resolution? You know, just do it if you want to show up at the gym, things like that. Little catchphrases that you can cling to while you're giving up on your resolution three weeks from now, and then you're not clinging to it anymore, are you, Charlie?
Do you make New Year's resolutions? I haven't in a very long time, but I'm about to start again, and I'm going to go for it. What do you got? I'm not going to drink soda anymore. And I've done it before where I've quit cold turkey. Yeah. I think the longest stretch I've ever went. Anything specific that you drink? Coke and Diet Coke? Wild cherry Pepsi. Oh my.
Chapter 4: What specific needs do the Pirates have for the upcoming season?
Yeah. And Arnold Palmer. But like, if I have one Arnold Palmer a week, I'm cool. But lately I've been- stress drinking sweets. Yeah. And I need to stop it. Drinking your feelings, right? I'm drinking my, my fears. And your fears. Yeah. Well, that would be under the umbrella of feelings. I cannot live in our fears anymore. Don't live in your fears anymore. I think that's a good one.
You're going to have to cope instead of reaching for the nearest substance to soothe yourself, aren't you? Water. Water's a great one. Drinking water right now. I need to fill mine up. I might need to quit these Cliffs energy bar, protein bars. A lot of times I bring Donnie one on Donnie Football Fridays. I'm hopelessly addicted to these things. They are so good. Have you eaten these before?
I haven't had the Cliff ones. I have the Nature Valley. They're unbelievable, Charlie. They're flavored chocolate, peanut butter, and chocolate mint. And I can't stop. Now, I had to quit marshmallows. I was eating these Waldorf salads, my mom used to call them.
Chapter 5: How do the hosts view the significance of New Year's resolutions?
She used to leave them for me when I'd come home from school. It was grapes, walnuts, marshmallows, and I added a little bit of chocolate. Well, the marshmallows send my intestines into spasms. I'm convinced of it. That's not good. Yeah. And it makes sense because they're very sticky. Imagine a bunch of marshmallows in your system right now. Run that salad back one more time.
Grapes, marshmallows, walnuts is basically it. I add a little bit of chocolate. I understand the walnuts and the chocolate and the marshmallows. Mm-hmm. It's the grapes that pique my interest the most. I don't know. My mom used to leave them for us when we were kids. Used to leave a little bowl of Waldorf salads on the table, and they were good. Is this named after Waldorf from Muppets fame?
I don't know. Maybe the Waldorf Historia Hotel in New York. I don't know. But they were good, and after she passed in September... I decided that as a tribute, that would be a good little snack. But like I said, the marshmallows sent my intestines. You could you could put your if you if I put my hand on my stomach. I could feel spasming. It was unbelievable. I've had that from time to time.
You should probably get that looked at. Well, no. I just had to quit eating marshmallows and putting a sticky gob of stuff into my intestines. That's all. It seemed pretty clear what the problem was because when I stopped, everything went fine. Or it could be an ingredient in the marshmallows that you could be allergic to that are in other things. Either way, I had to get rid of the marshmallows.
So you can't no more graham cracker. Could you have like marshmallow flavor? I think I, I think I could every once in a while splurge for, what do you call those things with the. S'mores, like the graham cracker. Yeah. S'mores. Yep. The graham cracker, the chocolate and the marshmallow. Yep. If it's melted, I think that would be helpful as well. Yeah.
So you can't just have cold marshmallows anymore. Right, exactly. You can't have room temp mallows anymore. I can't. And they were tough to give up because I hadn't eaten, I'll tell you this, other than the occasional, and I say occasional, I mean once every three years s'mores. How often does anybody eat s'mores? Right, Charlie? I mean, it's definitely a summer thing.
It's a lot of work to put together a s'mores. The only time that people are eating marshmallows in this type of weather is if they put it in their hot cocoa and it melts a little bit. Listen, I hadn't eaten marshmallows, just dry, regular marshmallows in decades. And suddenly I got addicted real fast. They're good marshmallows. They're just little balls of puffy sugar. They're good.
And it almost ruined me. What was I saying? Why were we talking about this before? Oh, New Year's resolutions. Yeah, no more soda for me. Yeah, no more soda for you. Yeah. Oh, which gets us back to Pittsburgh sports. For the Pirates, it should be finish the job. That should be their little motto. Just go out and get another bat. Will you? Just one more.
It's not like you've spent tens of millions of dollars here. Go out and get the Japanese third baseman. Go out and get Eugenio Suarez. Just finish the job. You'll have this town eating out of the palm of your hand. Eating marshmallows out of the palm of your hand.
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Chapter 6: What are the biggest challenges faced by the Steelers this season?
Oh, Tony is like, he spits in the face of that. Like, like he defies the limits that we, that we put on athletes in, in, in the last, over the last century and a half. It's, it's incredible. And one year he didn't get MVP where he pitched and hit. And I use that very argument that we're unable to fully comprehend what we're seeing.
Because even though Aaron Judge hit 60 home runs or whatever that year, my answer is always, how did he do on the mound? Because Otani hit 49 homers and had more strikeouts per at-bat than or per game, I should say, per nine innings than anybody in baseball. He was the best strikeout pitcher, and he hit 49 homers. And our minds couldn't comprehend it.
They used to say a long, long time ago, Sean, that people, when new things would arrive, like boats on the horizon, that people couldn't comprehend it because it was so outside of their scope of reality, they couldn't see it, which I think is what you're trying to say, or what you've said may be better than me. This is...
people in a movie theater in, you know, 1927 or whatever, watching a train, like a film of a train come forwards towards them and dive and dive off the sides. Like, right. Like this is people don't like it. It's tough to comprehend because we're not, we're just not, we don't have that track record. Like we know how sports is supposed to go.
We know the rhythm that these players careers are supposed to follow. And, and Ohtani just, he doesn't, he is the ultimate outlier for, I don't even know, since Babe Ruth, probably, in any sport at all. Is he the greatest athlete alive right now? I don't know how, I don't even know who second place would be.
I feel like I'm not maybe as knowledgeable as I should be, Dr. Borges, the man we affectionately refer to as Nelly. Like with Olympic athletes right now or maybe a soccer player, I'll frankly admit there could be a, is it UFC? What do they call that sport? Yeah, UFC. There could be somebody out there doing things that have never been done before. I don't know.
But in sort of mainstream sports, it's Otani by a billion miles. Right, Sean? Because great soccer players or great hoopers or great hockey players, they're all variations on a theme. This dude is one of one to a degree. He's better on both sides of the ball than Babe Ruth was. He's a better hitter.
He's a better all-around hitter and a better pitcher than Babe Ruth was with the Red Sox, and he's done it for longer. There is not an analog, and I think people struggle with that. Your opinion, Nellie? Is he the greatest athlete on earth right now? Other than maybe Jack Hughes, we're talking to a Devils fan here. Oh, no. Oh, God, no. Don't even get me started.
Andre Palat is the best athlete on earth. Would you like... Baker Mayfield, baby. We're talking to a Bucs fan, too. Yo, he was talking about something big. Would you like a slightly used Andre Palat and maybe a slightly used Dougie Hamilton? My God, they suck. Brutal. I mean, yeah. I know that's not compelling for sports talk radio, but Otani, he's an animal. Absolutely insane.
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