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The Ramsey Show

Establishing Money Boundaries With Family (Hour 2)

01 Aug 2023

Transcription

Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.

Chapter 1: How can I establish money boundaries with my family?

27.858 - 51.147 Dave Ramsey

Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, broadcasting from the pods, moving and storage studios. It's the Ramsey Show, where we help people build wealth. do work that they love, and create actual amazing relationships. Thanks for joining us, America. Dr. John Deloney, Ramsey Personality, is my co-host today.

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51.687 - 76.296 Dave Ramsey

He's a number one best-selling author of the book Own Your Past, Change Your Future, host of the Dr. John Deloney Show, and today we are launching his latest book on pre-sale. It comes out on October 3rd. You can buy it today, beginning today, on pre-sale. Thousands of you already have. Thank you. Pretty amazing. The new book is Building a Non-Anxious Life.

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76.857 - 88.341 Dave Ramsey

Now, we did a quick read, a chapter book we call them. They're like 37 pages, in other words, called Redefining Anxiety. 150,000 of you bought that so far.

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Chapter 2: Should I pay off my house early or not?

88.321 - 95.432 Dave Ramsey

It's a $10 quick thing on the way anxiety really works because anxiety is everywhere, John. It's a real issue.

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95.692 - 112.438 Dr. John Deloney

That's right. And we have a culture that's designed to try to stop anxiety. And that's as smart as going into your house and taking all the smoke detectors off the wall and the ceiling and putting them in a drawer and thinking your house is somehow now safer and better off than it was before.

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112.418 - 136.249 Dr. John Deloney

anxiety is almost never the problem it's always an alarm it's the alarm that lets you know hey something in your house is on fire right and so actually um dr wendy suzuki who's a researcher at nyu she she calls anxiety she says anxiety is your friend it's there to help you out um i may not go that far because i've been i've been i've been beat up with it pretty bad but um it is something trying to get your attention and so telling you something's wrong

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136.229 - 149.566 Dr. John Deloney

That's right. So if you want to have a not stressed out, not over anxious, not burned out life, you got to change some things in your home. You got to change some things in your life and the alarms will quit ringing, man. When there's no fire, no smoke, the alarms go off.

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150.187 - 166.33 Dave Ramsey

Yeah. And there's six daily choices you talk about in the book to do that. One of those is connection where we've lost relationships in this country and in this world. A lot of them have been lost to the cell phone. I actually was making fun of some of our friends at lunch today.

Chapter 3: What daily choices can help reduce anxiety?

167.192 - 187.346 Dave Ramsey

Four ladies that have lunch today, gather every day down here. I sat down at their table, and all four of them are sitting there on their phone. And I'm like, y'all are awful. I mean, they said, well, we're talking, and I'm like, you're texting across the table? How are you talking? I'm looking. All four of you have your nose in your phone. And they, well, we were talking a few minutes ago.

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188.327 - 192.494 Dave Ramsey

But we've lost the ability to have relationships because of dadgum phones.

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192.514 - 209.198 Dr. John Deloney

There's actually some research that suggests just having the phone on the table within an ability to see it. I'm not touching it. It's just sitting on the table actually causes the interaction to decrease. Somebody knows somebody else could come at any moment, right?

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209.378 - 211.922 Dave Ramsey

And it just diverts attention. We're just an interruption away.

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Chapter 4: How does anxiety relate to financial stress?

211.942 - 214.765 Dave Ramsey

That's right. One of the things you would also talk about is health.

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215.046 - 215.887 Dr. John Deloney

Yeah.

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215.907 - 217.569 Dave Ramsey

Health and healing. Yeah, sometimes.

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217.649 - 233.359 Dr. John Deloney

As a choice. Yeah, sometimes. Let me be honest. It's not a popular conversation to have. But we've reached a point in our culture where we're sick. We're sick. We're sick. We're not well. We're struggling with our weight. We're struggling with our cardiovascular health.

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Chapter 5: What role do relationships play in managing finances?

233.679 - 247.831 Dr. John Deloney

We're just not well. And we're wondering why our anxiety alarms are going off all the time. Or... We have seven Red Bulls and four cups of coffee for breakfast. Is something wrong with that? We're wondering why our hearts are beating out of our chest, right?

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247.851 - 248.592 Dave Ramsey

What's wrong with that, John?

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249.895 - 270.01 Dr. John Deloney

I have one person that I care about who went to see a counselor about anxiety, and the counselor said, hey, just take 30 days off of, just drop caffeine for 30 days. And there was about a week of awful headaches. And the anxiety kind of magically went away. And so they just found out they were super – They were mainlining coffee. They lacked tolerance to caffeine.

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270.03 - 285.492 Dr. John Deloney

So all I have to say is we've got to take control of our health. We've got to take control of dealing with our old traumas. And so that we can sit in our present life and deal with the chaos that is real, we can deal with it peacefully, not as adding chaos to chaos.

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Chapter 6: How can I effectively communicate financial boundaries?

285.472 - 302.822 Dave Ramsey

So two of the choices are relationships and health that's two of the six choices and as you make better choices in these daily choices in these six areas that cause anxiety then the anxiety has no reason the alarm has no reason to go off because it's not there's nothing there to be afraid of.

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302.954 - 325.382 Dr. John Deloney

Yeah, one of the things that modern science has convinced us of is that our bodies are stupid and that our theories are better and our medicine is better and our super atomic routines are better. And there's something about letting your body talk to you and say, hey, We're not safe right now. Hey, we owe $100,000 on that student loan.

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325.763 - 340.125 Dr. John Deloney

If we make one wrong move at work, we're going to get let go, and we lose the house, and we lose these cars. Your body's trying to get your attention, man. Financial stress. Yeah, if you're financial stressed, if you're not well, if you don't have any friends, your body's like, hey, we're not safe, we're not safe.

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340.565 - 354.735 Dr. John Deloney

And so instead of shutting that up, instead of climbing up in your kitchen and taking the batteries out of the alarm, This book is all about, man, how can we reclaim our homes? Put the fire out. How can we reclaim our families, reclaim our bodies? Put the fire out, man, once and for all.

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354.855 - 360.709 Dave Ramsey

Financial peace, relational peace, peace, peace, peace is the opposite of anxious, anxious, anxious.

Chapter 7: What strategies can help maintain financial peace?

361.09 - 361.671 Dave Ramsey

So there it is.

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362.032 - 385.341 Dr. John Deloney

And similar to the financial peace message, We have an emergency fund, not if, because things will come, right? And so we build the non-anxious life so that when our cousin passes away, when dad gets sick, when mom gets cancer, that we have the capacity to go sit and be a part of those life things that happen all the time. Because your tank's full. Because we got, that's exactly right. Yeah.

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385.675 - 412.199 Dave Ramsey

Hey, all month long, we're giving away cash. You could win $500 a week and a grand prize of $3,000. Check that out at the RamseySolutions.com slash giveaway. The total money makeover from paycheck to purpose, own your past, change your future. John's book before this one is now $12 this month. And guess what? The brand new book is $20. If you preorder it, you get $75 in free bonus items.

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Chapter 8: How do I hold onto hope while paying off debt?

412.239 - 434.496 Dave Ramsey

The new book is Building a Non-Anxious Life. If you want the $75 in free bonus items, all you got to do is go to RamseySolutions.com. and get the book while it's on pre-sale. We'll ship the book to you, the e-book to you, the audio book to you. And in the meantime, we will send you one of John's talks, and you want to check all of that out as well. And that's all just for $20.

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434.996 - 449.901 Dave Ramsey

Also, all questions for human conversation cards are on sale right now, $12. That's a bargain, too. Big sale going on right here in the middle of summer. RamseySolutions.com.com. Be sure you check every bit of that out.

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450.122 - 468.109 Dave Ramsey

And, guys, if you want to help, if you're a John Deloney fan like I am and you want to help us and help John in the process, pre-purchasing, pre-ordering the book helps our marketing push big time because it pretty much ensures that he's going to be a number one bestseller on the day that the book actually launches. The pre-sales all count towards that.

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468.709 - 491.207 Dave Ramsey

And so you're helping us by going ahead and getting it, and we're bribing you to do it. We're giving you extra good stuff. Not above it. Not above it. We're not proud. Hey, kids. We'll give you ice cream. $75 worth of stuff for $20. Sit here and be quiet. And it helps us. That's right. So thank you. Thank you for that. And by the way, the book's awesome. Just as an aside.

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491.507 - 500.142 Dr. John Deloney

The comments folks are sending on social media are just like they're putting wind in my sails, man. People are sending a lot of really great, wonderful stuff. It's awesome.

500.122 - 524.499 Dave Ramsey

That's very cool. Well, I mean, you guys told us with the little quick read, you know, redefining anxiety being so popular that this was a subject that John needed to go further on. And so now he has. This is a major book launch, a major book, a full book, not a 37-pager. This is a real one. And so it treats the subject beautifully in a way that everyone can understand and actually do it.

525.019 - 541.239 Dave Ramsey

This is The Ramsey Show. Dr. John Deloney, Ramsey Personality, is my co-host today. Amy's in Dallas. Hi, Amy. Welcome to The Ramsey Show. What's up?

541.259 - 561.029

Hi. So I have a question. I'm the second to youngest of seven siblings. And typically, due to my financial situation, I've noticed that whenever we're out with family events or vacations, It's kind of expected that I pay for things.

561.049 - 561.971 Dr. John Deloney

Oh, no.

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