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Chapter 1: What is discussed at the start of this section?
Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, it's The Ramsey Show, where we help people build wealth, do work that they love, and create actual amazing relationships. Dr. John Deloney, Ramsey Personality, is my co-host today. Open phones at 888-825-5225. You jump in. We'll talk about your life and your money. John has a new book coming out in just a couple of weeks from tomorrow.
It comes out on October the 3rd. This recording, as you're hearing it right now, is September the 18th. And today is the last day that you can preorder and get the e-book early. If you order today, you'll get the e-book for free tomorrow. That's pretty cool, John.
I didn't even know that.
That's fantastic. Yeah, it's pretty neat. Nearly half the U.S. population reports that their lives are affected by anxiety, stress, or burnout. The book is Building a Non-Anxious Life, and he walks you through the six daily choices to recognize and break free from a life spinning out of control. The book is already a huge success, and it's not even out yet.
The sales are huge because there's a problem out there that's huge. That's right.
It's an absolute mess out there. It was, it was good this past weekend to connect with a live audience and, um, Man, they're feeling it. Yeah. Just real regular moms and dads and brothers and sisters and aunts and uncles are feeling it out there. And so, yeah, it's a mess.
At the SMART conference this last weekend, John did the talk Smoke, Fire, and Freedom, which has a lot of the content of the book in it or some of the content of the book in it. And, yeah, that audience are sitting on the edge of their seats followed by a standing ovation. So it's absolutely, yeah, it's touching a nerve to say, yes, anxiety is real.
Yes, there's a lot of things real in the mental health space. The statistics of death and despair are huge. And yet there's hope.
Yeah. And this book is a roadmap. And I think that's missing a lot. Most of the solutions are... Come pay us a whole bunch of money, and we're going to try a bunch of stuff over the next four weeks, five weeks, six months. And this is a pretty consistent roadmap. It's been around for a long, long, long time. I didn't invent any of this stuff. This is as ancient as time.
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Chapter 2: What are the key points about anxiety and mental health?
And we've heard that. We've heard the statistics. Next would be a voice, and the best quality communication is in person because you get tone, body language, eye movement. You get everything then, and you can go, oh, she's lying.
Well, and we all know that 70% to 90% of communication is nonverbal, but we took out all the nonverbal stuff, which leaves us with, you know.
A 16-year-old that only knows how to do a breakup on a text.
Dave, I had a graduate student come in one day crying and shaking and handed me his phone, and he had just been served – like, you're getting papers today. He got divorced via text. Oh, my gosh. And get this. My response is, are you going to talk to her? What are you doing? Like, why are you here? And the response was, well, we've got a Zoom call set up for Friday, and I said –
I think I know why you're getting a divorce.
I 100% know the problem. That's it, man. I think I know why you're getting a divorce. If this was me, I would have been on a plane for a second this morning.
Oh, my gosh.
And sitting at your kitchen table going, what in the... But I can look at that kid and say he's weak, or I can also look at that kid and say, oh... Society has told him a lie.
He didn't have any skills, yeah. He didn't have any lie. That's right. He didn't tell him a lie, that this is okay. This is the way we do this. This is the way to have a friend as a Facebook friend. This is the way to do a breakup is on the text. This is the thing. So all these things create anxiety is my point. Correct.
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Chapter 3: How can daily choices help manage anxiety?
Um, but unfortunately with his work schedule, I have been the one that has had to take the kids on the nights that he has to work late. So me getting a full time job for the longest time was out of the question because our babysitter actually got shut down for a little while. Um, because she wasn't properly licensed. And so, yeah, I have just been living on tax return tips that I'm getting.
The problem is that these priorities have gotten all backwards on you. Okay. All of these things you're throwing at me are solved when you tell them all to take a side seat because you have to work and you have money.
And when you have money because you're working, now you find a different babysitter and you're not dealing with some jack leg who's not even licensed and gets put on the street and shuts your whole operation down. Oh, and by the way, when he calls and says he has to work, you say, well, I'm sorry. You have the kids. I'm working.
Yeah.
You don't revolve your life around all of these other people. You set your life up and they revolve around you.
Okay.
That's what's the problem.
Do you feel guilty that you filed for divorce here?
I don't feel guilty, no, but I just feel like any time that the kids are not going to be properly taken care of by him, I just feel like since I was a stay-at-home mom for so long that it's my responsibility.
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Chapter 4: What strategies are suggested for setting boundaries with family?
Let me tell you, the greatest gift you can give your kids is a present, stable, non-anxious mom and dad. And that means you got to be able to pay your bills. You got to be able to eat. If you're worried about your kids eating while you're sitting on the floor playing with them, they're going to feel that tension and they're going to absorb it. They're going to make it their fault.
You can't do that to your kids.
You can't do that to your kids. The best thing you can do for you and them is go make a little money right now. You don't need to go make $300,000 a year, but you do need to go make $50,000. Right now. Right now. And there's people doing that. And so hang on. We're going to give you a copy of Ken Coleman's book, From Paycheck to Purpose, and his other book, The Proximity Principle.
And as soon as they hit your mailbox, I want you to sit down and read them and turn the stupid television off. You don't need to have a TV on in your house at all right now. Yeah.
Turn it off.
You need to be reading these two books and you need to be working.
Call a local school. People are so desperate for teachers right now. You've been a teacher as a trainer. Start thinking outside the box a little bit, but call local schools and see if you can get in as a teacher.
Yeah, anything. I mean, Target's hiring. UPS, we're coming into Christmas. Every retail out there is hiring at $25 an hour right now. They can't get people. And so you can get the hours and you can get the dollars coming in. But some of these people are just going to have to line up in your life and stand to the side instead of you being the one that stands to the side every time.
That was the moral of the story we heard when you called us, Cammie. So we love you and we want you to win, kiddo, and understand why you're scared. But the chaos leaves when you rise up above it and start telling everybody where to dance instead of being the one told when to dance. This is The Ramsey Show. Justin's in Houston, Texas. Justin, welcome to the Ramsey Show.
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Chapter 5: What financial strategies should I consider at 63 years old?
It's killed you, man. I mean, you make good money and you've got virtually no money. So... I mean, I'm not saying you're horrible, but you're a C-minus student at this. This is not an A+. You didn't flunk. You're not retiring with Social Security only. That's flunking, right?
Chapter 6: How can I effectively pay off my debts?
But, you know, you got to lean into this. And, yeah, I'm with John. If I woke up in your shoes, what would I do? I'm about your age. I mean, I'm 63. So if I woke up in your shoes, I'd be driving a $10,000 truck. I'd be debt-free, and I'd have a game plan to knock that $136,000 out so fast.
Chapter 7: What are the benefits of being debt-free in retirement?
It's unbelievable. Meanwhile, dumping everything else I can find into my 401k, getting Roth IRAs and load those puppies up. Because here's the thing. Seven years, it'll double. Whatever you got in your lump sum today, it'll double if it's in good mutual funds.
Chapter 8: How does investing compare to holding gold?
So that $110,000 that's there will be $220,000, and your house will be paid for. That's your $250,000 I'm talking about. That's what you'll have. You might have a little bit more than that if you get aggressive on putting some in. You might have $300,000. But you could have 600.
And then you can buy a truck. We talked about this earlier. The confrontation will come. And this confrontation is going to be between you and math. It's coming. You can manage it on your terms right now and make some sacrifices, some pretty hard sacrifices. Or you can just wait. And it will hit you at 88 in your award of the state.
Yep. Ellen's with us in Atlanta. Hi, Ellen. Welcome to the Ramsey Show.
Thank you. Hey, Dave. Hey, John. Really appreciate your show. Sure. I am 63 years old. I'm single, and I am trying to decide whether to take out a loan on a house or townhouse or to buy. My net worth is about $4 million.
Why would you borrow money?
Well, my financial advisor... advise me to do that.
I would get a new financial advisor. Yeah, they're fired. Bye, Felicia. You have more money than he does. And how did you get there? Not by his advice. You got there by using your common sense.
Yeah.
And your common sense is telling you to pay cash for this.
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