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The Ramsey Show

You Have To Beat Your Spending Addiction (Hour 1)

31 May 2023

Transcription

Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.

Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?

30.052 - 49.478 George Campbell

Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, broadcasting from the Pods Moving and Storage Studio, it's The Ramsey Show, where we help people build wealth, do work that they love, and create amazing relationships. I'm George Campbell, joined this hour by my good friend, Dr. John Deloney, best-selling author and host of The Dr. John Deloney Show.

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49.458 - 64.671 George Campbell

And we're taking your calls, America, at 888-825-5225. I know you've got a lot going on in your mind, and you're DMing me a thousand questions, and I say, call the show, because it's a lot easier to talk to you in person than to go back and forth staring at my screen. I get the same thing.

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64.711 - 86.872 Dr. John Deloney

Call the show, call the show, call the show. Hey, and I've got to tell you, so Dave and the Entree Leadership team has their annual 2,500 to 3,000 business leaders. They take over a city, basically, and they're here in Nashville. And last night, they took over the entire Opry. The Grand Ole Opry. The Grand Ole Opry. Epic. It was a blast.

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86.892 - 90.357 Dr. John Deloney

There was all these different country singers and actors showed up, comedians.

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Chapter 2: How can I stay out of debt for good?

90.437 - 115.443 Dr. John Deloney

It was a hoot. But I'm walking through the lobby with my daughter, and this guy comes up and goes, Oh, hey, I just saw George Campbell, too. He goes, Hey, you're John Deloney. I just saw George Campbell. And I just instantly said, George Campbell's the worst. He hit me, he punches my arm, and he goes, I love how y'all just rib each other. And I said, I don't think you understand.

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115.483 - 118.208 Dr. John Deloney

I don't like any way, and my daughter, the whole thing was awkward.

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118.769 - 125.5 George Campbell

But man, he was protecting him some GK, man. People are very protective. I think it's because I'm small, they feel like they have to defend me.

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125.48 - 127.744 Dr. John Deloney

Yeah, they can't tell that over the phone.

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127.984 - 136.239 George Campbell

That's true. Well, we really are great friends. People often wonder, does John actually like me? The answer is no, but we are really good friends, so that helps. I mean, I like you.

137.101 - 140.346 Dr. John Deloney

You've grown on me. Not literally, but you've grown on me.

140.366 - 152.987 George Campbell

I have not grown since the fifth grade, John. Thanks for the reminder. Well, hey, if you want to have some fun today, while the cat's away, the mice will play. Is that what they say? Okay. We're going to go to the lines now. Shut John down.

153.027 - 154.575 Dr. John Deloney

There goes George making it weird.

Chapter 3: When does living with my parents become a crutch?

154.595 - 159.638 George Campbell

Kendra kicks us off in Charlotte, North Carolina. Kendra, please save the Ramsey Show. How are you doing?

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160.833 - 189.253 Kendra (Caller)

Good. Thank you. A little backstory. My husband and I have, we've been through Financial Peace University and we've paid off our debt several times in our marriage and been debt free. And then we just seem to creep back into debt. So we're on baby step two again. And we're both on board and we're working to pay off our debt and we're following the plan. But I just have a lot of

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189.757 - 203.253 Kendra (Caller)

anxiety around it. And it's not that I don't want to be gazelle intense, but I'm just finding it difficult this time because I have such a fear of going back into debt again.

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203.313 - 206.177 Dr. John Deloney

Who have you lost trust in, you or your husband?

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210.602 - 232.224 Kendra (Caller)

Both of us in different ways at different times. I mean, I probably don't have a lot of trust in myself. I feel like When we've done this before, it's almost like the whole time we're in baby step two, we're planning for what we're going to purchase when we're out of debt, if that makes any sense. You know, we kind of have a running list.

233.005 - 239.634 Kendra (Caller)

And then, you know, months, years later, that list becomes the things that put us back into debt.

239.754 - 242.578 George Campbell

So what kind of debt are you getting back into each time?

244.178 - 265.933 George Campbell

uh credit card debt okay so have you ever cut up the credit card and closed the accounts or are you just paying off the credit card debt and then hanging on to the card um we have cut up the credit card and closed the accounts before yes and then you get out of debt and you go we're going to reopen a credit card to make purchases yes and then what are you spending that money on is there something in particular each time

267.635 - 269.898 Kendra (Caller)

No, it's nothing that we need.

Chapter 4: Should we sell our house to pay off debt?

344.168 - 344.388 Kendra (Caller)

Yes.

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345.05 - 350.359 Dr. John Deloney

So that meant the spending was the thing we all pointed at, but that meant you had a house that was chaotic.

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351.335 - 352.357 Kendra (Caller)

Very.

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352.377 - 356.163 Dr. John Deloney

And you watched your parents not be very stable together. Fair?

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358.066 - 358.146

Yes.

358.166 - 370.305 Dr. John Deloney

It's very easy. And here's why it's a common response that when you grow up in that sort of chaos or abusive environment, the whole world becomes about a...

372.698 - 400.09 Dr. John Deloney

for lack of better words a fantasy into the future this is going to be this thing and you're always living for then and it becomes virtually impossible to live right now because living right now is a skill and living right now for you got was terrifying it was scary got you hurt and so everything became about living then living then living then even though in the present it's brutal is that you see what i'm saying

400.964 - 403.247 Kendra (Caller)

Yeah, I've never thought about it like that, but yeah.

403.327 - 429.03 Dr. John Deloney

And so what you have to do is this whole thing is an identity shift. You guys can do the thing. Y'all can do the hard thing. But you get to it, and then you live in the future. We're going to be out of debt one day. Then you get there, and you don't know what to do. So you default to your fantasy list, and you just start the whole cycle back over again. And then you give yourself a new deadline.

Chapter 5: What steps should I take to start investing?

498.272 - 512.074 George Campbell

30,000 in credit card debt on vacations and spending. Yes. Have a conversation with your husband tonight and say, never again is this going to happen. We're going to get on a plan. We're going to keep each other accountable. We're going to freeze our accounts.

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512.094 - 532.279 George Campbell

We're going to get a monthly budget and we're going to become those people who just say, if we don't have the money for it, we don't get it. That's called delayed gratification. And it's a huge part of building wealth and accomplishing your dreams together. This is The Ramsey Show. Welcome back to The Ramsey Show.

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532.299 - 549.889 George Campbell

I'm Ramsey Personality, George Campbell, joined by Dr. John Deloney, and we're taking your calls at 888-825-5225. Well, good news and bad news. Our $10 sale ends today, but the good news is you still have a chance to get your hands on some of our life-changing books and tools.

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550.249 - 564.021 George Campbell

So if you're looking to get out from under that pile of credit card bills that eats up those paychecks every month, grab Dave Ramsey's bestselling book, The Total Money Makeover. Millions have used his practical plan in the book to take control of their money and change them and their family's future. It's only 10 bucks.

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564.321 - 578.053 George Campbell

And you can also get his latest book, Baby Steps Millionaires, for 10 bucks as well, where he shows you how to build a legacy, how to invest the right way once you've paid off your debt. And there's a ton of real life stories to inspire you, folks who actually did this stuff and became Baby Steps Millionaires.

578.033 - 596.932 George Campbell

And if you want to improve your relationships and mental health, pick up my friend Dr. John Deloney's Questions for Humans conversation cards and his book Own Your Past, Change Your Future, which is on the $10 sale for the first time ever. Ever, ever, yeah. That's big. So if you've been holding out for a sale on that book, this is your chance. It ends today. Shop these deals before they're gone.

597.252 - 602.438 George Campbell

Go to ramseysolutions.com slash sale. That's ramseysolutions.com slash sale.

602.458 - 620.545 Dr. John Deloney

Hey, I want to say something about this. So it's a $10 sale. I've had multiple conversations in the past few weeks with some sort of meta narrative that sounds like this. And I know you've had it because it's about money. When people are reaching out to me about money, then I know it's on people's hearts and minds.

622.145 - 637.935 Dr. John Deloney

hey, man, they're going to barely pass this debt ceiling thing, and then the Supreme Court is going to strike down the student loan thing, and they're all going to have to start repaying, and we're going to have this massive recession in October, September, August, right?

Chapter 6: How do I manage anxiety about falling back into debt?

639.458 - 656.369 Dr. John Deloney

And there's some variation of that story going on and on. First, I want to say I've heard some variation of some story every three months since I've started working here. There's always a... The crash is coming, John. You eventually throw enough darts backwards, you're going to hit bullseye. And everyone's going to be like, oh, that guy's a genius.

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656.389 - 657.01 George Campbell

See, I said.

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657.471 - 677.015 Dr. John Deloney

That's right. But let's say that is. Let's say you knew a calamity was coming in three to five months. Why would you not do everything you can, get every piece of information, data, come up with a plan right now to shore up things as much as possible in five to six months?

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677.736 - 697.056 Dr. John Deloney

If you are staring at three years you haven't paid student loans and it's about to come and you're looking at your budget and you realize, whoa, I bought a car that I couldn't afford over the two or three year student loan holiday. I did this. I'm in a house I can't afford. Start right now. Start right now.

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697.676 - 713.774 Dr. John Deloney

If, George, if you call me and you're like, hey, there's a tornado coming your way and we live 10 miles from each other, I'm not going to wait until it's sitting on top of my house. I'm going to move my family down to the basement. And we're going to batten down the hatches, as they say. We're kind of prepped for that moment. But we'll be ready to rock and roll, right?

714.174 - 733.873 Dr. John Deloney

And so all I have to say is this. If you're sideways, if you know somebody who's sideways, for God's sakes, 10 bucks. $10 for a total money makeover is a roadmap to, okay, I don't know any other thing that works. I clearly am not doing this right. $10 and I can go in a whole new direction.

734.374 - 752.119 Dr. John Deloney

It just doesn't make any sense to me when you got this kind of, Dave starts giving all of our crap away for half price. Yeah. Not that I'm upset about my, not that I'm on 100% commission and he cuts the commissions in half. But like, man, if you for $10, you can hand it to your son or your daughter or your friend and say, hey,

752.099 - 774.867 Dr. John Deloney

winter's coming just here's a coat here's a jacket just for that moment i just don't understand the turtle up and let's just all be scared and pissed off let's just start let's just more fun to doom scroll and hope that you stumble upon the right advice the right tool and the right advice is usually some fraudulent idiot saying something that's going to make them wealthy at your expense when when times get bad

775.083 - 786.696 George Campbell

Don't do that. Well, the good news is our books don't involve any shortcuts. It's all the long cuts in our books. It's do the hard thing the first time the right way so that you don't screw it up and then call us and say, hey, I did a dumb thing.

Chapter 7: What are the consequences of a spending addiction?

796.2 - 809.814 Dr. John Deloney

George's interview. He told a same joke that he told the other day when I was on the air with him. And I don't say that to make fun of him. I say that to say he's been saying the same thing for 30 years. And it works. It just works, man.

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809.914 - 821.862 George Campbell

It works every time you work it. So don't miss this, whether it's for you or for someone in your life. RamseySolutions.com slash sale. It ends today. All right, let's go to Joseph in Columbus, Ohio. Joseph, welcome to the show.

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823.725 - 828.071 Joseph (Caller)

Hi, thank you guys so much. George, Sean, hope you guys are both doing well. Thank you so much for having me.

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828.131 - 829.092 George Campbell

We are. What's going on with you?

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830.394 - 844.273 Joseph (Caller)

So I guess the question I have is a bit convoluted, but it's one that I know myself and a couple of my friends my age have been asking and kind of debating over the last couple of months. But I guess it's really a question of, for me,

844.81 - 872.164 Joseph (Caller)

Um, when is saving and trying to be financially stable, detrimental to my life goals and plans of moving forward and that, that being in the sense of moving out and kind of moving on with my life. And the reason I say that is. Two years ago, I graduated from college. I started working as a town acquisition specialist and moved out to Cincinnati, Ohio, with a partner I had at the time.

872.705 - 895.294 Joseph (Caller)

The relationship fell through, and I moved back home, and I've been there since. And I've been trying to save my money and be as smart as possible with being financially conservative. But I guess my question is really, when does saving... as a priority in my life become too much, if that makes sense. And kind of hold me back from, uh, moving on, uh, that being like moving out.

895.555 - 911.398 Joseph (Caller)

And I guess I've kind of hit a wall where I don't really know if I'll ever feel truly financially secure and moving out. And I'm just not really sure what I should do moving forward when it comes to being smart with my finances versus actually.

911.419 - 912.54 George Campbell

How old are you?

Chapter 8: How can I create a stable financial future for my family?

986.125 - 989.268 Dr. John Deloney

My question for you is, have you healed from that breakup?

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992.632 - 1006.033 Joseph (Caller)

Yes. I guess that's a bit of a tough question to answer, but I would say largely yes. I think I'm in a better spot with my career path and both personally and professionally, I guess I would say that I'm definitely in a better spot.

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1007.194 - 1022.649 Dr. John Deloney

Where's that guy that two years ago took a job across the country and moved out there to go have an adventure? Because it sounds to me like that guy got his heart ripped out of his chest and then he walked back home and he went back to his parents' house and that guy hasn't recovered yet.

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1025.171 - 1042.537 Joseph (Caller)

I think you're definitely right on that. I definitely was a different person before and after and I think that Prior to it, I definitely, I don't want to say I was necessarily prone to taking risks, but I think now I've definitely become more risk adverse. Absolutely.

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1043.098 - 1067.889 Dr. John Deloney

So you used a great word there. Here's the suckiest part about relationships. Whether you're married 70 years or you just met somebody, 100% of relationships, this is from the great Esther Perel, 100% of relationships is a risk. Somebody's been married 70 years. My grandparents were married 73 years. My granddad leaned over and told my grandmother, I'm going to go get something to eat.

1067.969 - 1085.73 Dr. John Deloney

Do you want something? And she could just be rude and mean, or she could say, sure. Right? It's always a risk. What you've done is you were bench pressing and the weight was too heavy, so you put it back on the bar and you took all the weight off the bar and now you're just pumping the bar and you're going nowhere. You've got to risk putting weight back on the bar.

1086.372 - 1103.546 Dr. John Deloney

I would say sit down, get a dollar an amount, 10 grand, 50 grand, whatever the number is. And put a deadline on it and make yourself move out of your parents' house. Get an apartment. Get an apartment. It's not going to stunt your goals. It's going to make you stronger. And then you're going to find your professional career accelerating at an unprecedented pace, man.

1103.886 - 1106.511 Dr. John Deloney

You've got to get back out there. I wish there was another way. There just isn't.

1113.106 - 1135.771 George Campbell

I'm George Campbell, joined by Dr. John Deloney. You're listening to The Ramsey Show, and this is a show about you, about what's on your mind, what's on your heart, what keeps you up at night, the fights that you're having at home, the longings you have, the vision for your life that maybe didn't pan out. We want to help you take the right next step. And the number to call is 888-825-5225.

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