Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.
Chapter 1: What does Kendall Jenner say about the Kardashian curse in her Super Bowl commercial?
Good morning, girlies, it's the toast. It's Jackson, Claude, and we're your hosts. It's your favorite show, the fast five things you need to know. We'll start your day off swirly. It's the toast. They sound amazing. Welcome back to The Toast and happy Tuesday. Ryan Lochte was on season one of Traitors. Thank you. Star asterisk. It's Wednesday. So sorry about that.
Not me accurately predicting who would make a good Traitors cast and lo and behold, the casting team thought so as well. Yeah, I'm glad we all agreed. You are aware it's Wednesday. You're kidding. Yeah. Good news for you.
Chapter 2: How much allowance does Nicola Peltz receive from her father?
Love that for me. Wait, you're kidding. Yeah, Wednesday. Yesterday, dear toasters. Oh, yesterday, dear toasters. Duh. Okay, so sorry, everyone. Happy Wednesday. Already issuing a correction. Yeah, as Ben would say, it's probably the injections getting to me. I have to tell you something. So yesterday, yeah, you guys are probably wondering why do I look so different.
Chapter 3: What drama unfolds between Ashley Tisdale and Haylie Duff?
I finally, after two years, got Botox and lip filler. Now my upper lip is very swollen. You're talking a little different, too. My upper lip, like, it hurts. Like, it's very swollen. No, I've been. Just bear with me.
Chapter 4: What does Amanda Batula reveal about her split from Kyle Cooke?
And Ben is when I forgot, because I haven't gotten, like, any sort of Botox in so long. Ben is so dramatic. He keeps calling it the injections.
Chapter 5: What romance rumors surround Lala Kent and Michelle Saniei?
Okay. So this morning I was like, Oh my God, I am so tired. Ruby has a runny nose. So like, it was not the best night's sleep. Like I'm just tired. I'm allowed to be fucking tired. I wake up. I'm like, Oh, I am so tired. And Ben is like, you think it's the injections? Like, I'm like, no, like the injections calm down. Like he's being so dramatic yesterday.
And he was like, and like, what's in these injections? I'm like, I don't fucking know. Who cares? Like, leave me alone. He's being so dramatic. Botox, because it's toxic. I actually got Dysport. They were like, do you have a preference?
Chapter 6: What insights can we gain from the Kardashian family's financial dynamics?
And I was like, honestly. Dysport or Datport? I'm like, the cheaper port, please. Like, it was an expensive afternoon. Yeah, I don't care. So if I'm looking different, it's the Dysport. Yeah. Do you want to tell us what you did? Sure, I did Dysport in my forehead. That's like Botox. But I was having to explain to the doctor, I'm like, yeah, I'm kind of like a comedian, like a personality.
It's a new doctor I've never been to. And so I'm on camera a lot. And so I still like to emote. I don't want to be totally frozen. So she understood. And then I was telling her about my upper lip saga, which she also understood. She gave me what I believe is a kiss. Excuse me? Well, she didn't kiss me, sorry.
Chapter 7: How does the podcast discuss the impact of celebrity relationships on personal identity?
Excuse? She kept saying to the nurse like a kiss. So I think that's just like when your upper lip like needs to be a little, because she didn't put anything in my lower lip. My lower lip is like fine and normal. Oh, interesting. My upper lip like curls up when I smile. So she did a little Botox under my nose. Oh my God, it was so fucking painful. And I also got a full body check while I was there.
what no nothing what no nothing cardboard koji goes for injections what cardboard koji did go for injections because you already commented about the price of dispor versus botox okay i don't know what the difference is and i'm sure like i'm sure i got the more expensive one because i was just like yeah whatever you recommend just throwing money at at the problem yeah so cardboard koji i spent three thousand dollars so would car sorry two thousand would cardboard koji ever
ever do it no just 2k on a random afternoon but i was watching our show the best show on earth like seriously the greatest show and it's interesting like our eyebrows up until today both of our eyebrows like move so much like we're so emotive you know the face i pulled an unremarkable student like i don't know that i could have made that face if i had botox so like enjoy this moment for what it is the show is very expressive as am i um but yeah our fire heads were moving more than they probably ever fire heads
More than they ever moved in the show. I know. I was thinking that. Like, I remember when I was doing stand-up, I was doing less Botox because, like, it really was so important that I move. And now, like, I seriously don't care. You guys, the show's amazing regardless of whether my eyebrows move. And they don't. And a lot of you listen as a podcast. Oh, true.
Chapter 8: What are the hosts' thoughts on the upcoming Super Bowl and its celebrity connections?
So...
this is irrelevant yeah so i'm just like filled with with stuff with toxins and injections and i'm jealous whatever like she could have seriously put anything in there the good even the crunchy moms like they still do botox of course and i also like not to bring down the mood beyond the pale not to bring down the mood but while i was there like they said you know we have also because it was a cosmetic dermatologist they were like also you should get a full body check
And like, sure, even though there's something so humiliating about a full body check, I'm like my full body, like the whole thing, like even under my shirt. And so, yeah, I did a whole body check and yeah, not me having something irregular on my back. It's been biopsy, so stay tuned. It's good that you did that though. It's good that I did that.
Like I wasn't expecting, like full body checks are just sort of supposed to go off without a hitch. And she did my back very last. I was just sort of like scrolling there on my phone. And she was like, you know, I see something irregular on your back. I'm gonna biopsy it. So I had to get numb. It hurts so fucking bad. She scraped it off. So yeah, tune in next week to find out if it's melanoma.
Like. And I just feel like if I make light of it, it won't be melanoma. If I keep calling it. I also feel like, you know, lab's got a lab. I know. You know what? She was giving Sully. Like, I think she just wanted to scrape my back. Yeah, for sure. That's what she's trained to do. Yeah. Even though I was like, can I see?
And she like zoomed in on her like little stethoscope and took a picture for me. And you could understand why it was irregular? It was not regular for sure. But there's a million things that are regular could be a lot of them like nothing. Yeah. So hopefully, but I just feel like if I keep saying it's melanoma, like it won't be, you know? Yeah.
Yeah.
This is your time to get your skin checked, guys. Yeah, and it's nice that, like, you didn't even have to, like, seek it out. Like, it just sort of, like, fell into your lap. I was never going to go. You were never going to go. Yeah. So that's really good. Yeah. So stay tuned, you know, for the results. Well, I'm really excited about your new lips. You know, and I love work done.
Yeah, and work was done. And then also we like laid out future plans like for, you know, my next 10, 15 years. That was fun too. You had a 10 to 15 year plan? Yeah. Could that office accommodate all of your plans? Okay, it's not that many. And yeah. Like what sort of plans?
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