Ep43 From Conflict to Connection: Process Over Content

"Pure love is capable of great deeds, and it is not broken by difficulty or adversity."~ St. FaustinaDo you have the same arguments over and over again? Are you frustrated by a lack of connection in your relationship? Is it possible to still be connected when you disagree with the person you love?In this episode, Kenna and Pat Millea explore the transformative power of prioritizing Process over Content in communication and relationships. They delve into the significance of empathy and vulnerability in fostering genuine connection, especially during times of hardship or conflict. Through personal anecdotes from their own marriage, Kenna and Pat demonstrate the healing potential of empathy and authenticity in a relationship. The truth is that our arguments aren't really about the content: the thing that happened or what someone said. On a deeper level, our conflicts are about the process: how we were affected, and how badly we desire to be loved, known, and understood, even in times of conflict.Join Pat & Kenna for a fun and fruitful episode and take the next step toward conflict that connects!Episode 43 Show NotesChapters:00:00: Introduction and Highs & Hards13:52: Empathy creates connection22:24: Process over Content28:59: Fostering connection by focusing on Process41:15: Challenge By ChoiceQuestions for Reflection & Discussion:What is one thing that is sticking with you from this episode?What is a time that someone has truly empathized with you and worked to understand your feelings? How did that make you feel?When have you fallen into the trap of prioritizing being "right" over fostering understanding and connection in a conflict? How might a focus on Process over Content have led to a different outcome?When is it most tempting to get bogged down in content? How can you focus on process instead?What is a first step you can make to prioritizing process over content moving forward?Send us a text. We can't respond directly, but we're excited to hear what's on your mind!Click here to register for the DBT group from Jan. 20 - March 24, 2026 (MN & WI residents only)Support the showThank you for listening, and a very special thank you to our community of supporters! Visit us online at thiswholelifepodcast.com, and send us an email with your thoughts, questions, or ideas.Follow us on Instagram & FacebookInterested in more faith-filled mental health resources? Check out the Martin Center for IntegrationMusic: "You're Not Alone" by Marie Miller. Used with permission.

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