Tuesdays Are For Twilight

#104: Finale (We’re the Corn)

28 Feb 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Thank you for everything, TAFT family!

Breaking Dawn Blooper Reel

21 Feb 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Tune into our bloopers and outtakes from Breaking Dawn!

#103: Breaking Dawn Chapter 39 (Children of the Chicken Wings)

14 Feb 2023

Contributed by Lukas

It's a day that always seemed so far away but now it's here. We're covering the last chapter of the series!

#102: Breaking Dawn Chapter 38 (Eggward)

07 Feb 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Tune in to hear Paige's live reaction to the climax of Breaking Dawn! 

#101: Breaking Dawn Chapter 37 (20 Trout Flopping)

31 Jan 2023

Contributed by Lukas

In which Paige has some words for Aro and Caius.

#100: Breaking Dawn Chapters 35-36 (The Superior Nut)

24 Jan 2023

Contributed by Lukas

In our 100th episode, the showdown with the Volturi has finally begun.

#99: Breaking Dawn Chapters 33-34 (In Podcasts Passing)

17 Jan 2023

Contributed by Lukas

It's Emily's favorite part of the book as Bella meets the mysterious J. Jenks. 

#98: Breaking Dawn Chapters 31-32 (Ye Olde Dickey’s Sporting Goods)

10 Jan 2023

Contributed by Lukas

We're back from our holiday break and we have a whole new cast of characters to discuss!

#97: Breaking Dawn Chapters 29-30 (Trash Crumbs)

20 Dec 2022

Contributed by Lukas

It's our last episode of 2022 and we're chatting about the Volturi's strategy and what might be next! 

#96: Breaking Dawn Chapter 28 (Justice for Jaguars)

13 Dec 2022

Contributed by Lukas

The Volturi are coming! The Volturi are coming! 

#95: Breaking Dawn Chapters 26-27 (Two Worms A Week)

06 Dec 2022

Contributed by Lukas

These chapters are a "filler episode" if we've ever seen one but we're still having fun and handing out hot tips!

#94: Breaking Dawn Chapters 24-25 (Hot and Heavy-Handed)

29 Nov 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Paige is out of pocket this week and you'll just have to listen to see why. The verified GoFundMe link for the Club Q shooting is available on all of ...

#93: Breaking Dawn Chapters 22-23 (Jazz ’Em)

22 Nov 2022

Contributed by Lukas

In which Renesmee is even more of an alien baby than we thought...

#92: Breaking Dawn Chapter 21 (Squash!)

15 Nov 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Wait how did we get on the subject of Pangea?

#91: Breaking Dawn Chapters 19-20 (The Denouement of It All)

08 Nov 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Bella is a vampire now bUT MORE IMPORTANTLY SHE CAN SEE A NEW COLOR?!?! 

#90: Breaking Dawn Chapter 18 (Fresh Fetus)

25 Oct 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Rip to Paige's innocence. 

#89: Breaking Dawn Chapter 17 (Alien Baby)

18 Oct 2022

Contributed by Lukas

The gruesome birth Paige has been predicting for a month may finally be upon us...

#88: Breaking Dawn Chapters 15-16 (Crumbs of Levity)

11 Oct 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Paige and Emily discuss the feminism behind different perspectives in these chapters and have some laughs along the way. Send in your spooky stories o...

#87: Breaking Dawn Chapters 13-14 (The Hoe Did Love That One)

27 Sep 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Leah's right and she should say it!

#86: Breaking Dawn Chapters 11-12 (I’d Have Mine With a Pickle)

20 Sep 2022

Contributed by Lukas

We're back and they're asking Bella Swan to do WHAT?

#85: Breaking Dawn Chapters 9-10 (The World’s Biggest Tapeworm)

06 Sep 2022

Contributed by Lukas

In which Edward has completely lost his damn mind and we reframe The Rosalie of It All.

#84: Breaking Dawn Chapter 8 (Edward Marie Cullen)

30 Aug 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Fun fact we got interrupted by a lawnmower literally five times while recording this episode hahahaha but join us for the first full chapter in Jacob'...

#83: Breaking Dawn Chapter 7 (Raw/Semi-Thawed)

23 Aug 2022

Contributed by Lukas

We read Chapter 7 of Breaking Dawn live this week and Paige was VERY right about some things and very... not right about others lol

#82: Breaking Dawn Chapters 5-6 (Wild Hot Dogs)

16 Aug 2022

Contributed by Lukas

This is a sex-positive podcast and boy do we have some sexiness going on this week!

#81: Breaking Dawn Chapters 3-4 (Like a Rat Over The Sink)

09 Aug 2022

Contributed by Lukas

It's the wedding we've all been waiting for!

#80: Breaking Dawn Chapters 1-2 (Screeps)

26 Jul 2022

Contributed by Lukas

What's with all the talk about children?!?!

#79: Bree Tanner Part 4 (Chugging my Dumb B*tch Juice)

12 Jul 2022

Contributed by Lukas

We've reached the end of Bree's story and we continue to be a fan of hers to the very end. 

#78: Bree Tanner Part 3 (Soft Cookie Shoppe)

05 Jul 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Tragedy is on the horizon and Diego is nowhere to be found. 

#77: Bree Tanner Part 2 (They Clink, They Clank)

28 Jun 2022

Contributed by Lukas

In which Emily is taken by surprise by a plot point for the first time in this podcast. 

#76: Bree Tanner Part 1 (It’s Actually A Sock)

21 Jun 2022

Contributed by Lukas

We're back and in uncharted territory as we enter the mind of a "real" vampire for the first time!

Eclipse Blooper Reel

07 Jun 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Tune in to hear our outtakes and bloopers from our Eclipse recordings! Donate to the families in Uvalde here: https://onestarfoundation.org/uvalde/ 

#75: Eclipse Chapter 27 and Epilogue (And the Lord Spoketh:”Me Hoy Minoy”)

31 May 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Come have fun with us on our last episode covering Eclipse!

#74: Eclipse Chapters 25-26 (Are You Jedward)

17 May 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Jane is back and more evil than ever.

#73: Eclipse Chapters 23-24 (Wolf Screaming Into the Darkness)

10 May 2022

Contributed by Lukas

WELP

#72: Eclipse Chapter 24 (WAP Prevails)

03 May 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Join us for a live reading of the infamous tent scene! 

#71: Eclipse Chapter 21 (Compassly)

26 Apr 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Bella stands up for herself this week and we are HERE FOR IT, plus a storm is brewing...

#70: Eclipse Chapters 19-20 (Seven Men in the Ketchup Aisle)

19 Apr 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Well that escalated quickly...

#69: Eclipse Chapter 18 (Jowls)

12 Apr 2022

Contributed by Lukas

In this short chapter, Jacob and Bella are extra cringe.

#68: Eclipse Chapters 16-17 (The Turkish Delight Economy)

05 Apr 2022

Contributed by Lukas

We're back and we can't help but be a little nostalgic as Bella graduates from high school. 

#67: Eclipse Chapters 14-15 (Probably Maybe, Probably Maybe Not)

22 Mar 2022

Contributed by Lukas

We rate these chapters an enthusiastic two thumbs down. And somehow Edward is the hero of these chapters? It's a weird world, y'all. 

#66: Eclipse Chapters 12-13 (Choppity Chop)

15 Mar 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Stephenie has hit yet another level of racism and Bella is back on her bullshit. We're here to talk about it! 

#65: Eclipse Chapter 11 (Hot Dog Slut)

01 Mar 2022

Contributed by Lukas

This week Paige and Emily break down Stephenie's made-up history of the Quileutes and share some real stories and research about the actual tribe. 

#64: Eclipse Chapters 9-10 (The Effervescent Randy Jackson)

22 Feb 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Something big happens this week that simultaneously feels like the most uneventful week ever, so Paige and Emily are here to regale you with some pers...

#63: Eclipse Chapter 8 (You Don’t Need to Breathe to Love)

15 Feb 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Stephenie understood the Valentine's Day assignment? Kinda?

#62: Eclipse Chapters 6-7 (Soup Gorl)

08 Feb 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Bella gets some advice from Rosalie. Content warning: the chapter covered in this episode contains direct mention of sexual violence. 

#61: Eclipse Chapters 4-5 (Freaky Virgos)

01 Feb 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Paige's main takeaway from this episode: what was the reason?

#60: Eclipse Chapter 3 (Stephenie Owes Me Money)

25 Jan 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Jacob is back and he's spilling. 

#59: Eclipse Chapter 2 (Ice Cold Peepee)

18 Jan 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Edward? Gaslighting? We never expected that. 

#58: Eclipse Chapter 1 (Eco Warrior)

11 Jan 2022

Contributed by Lukas

We're baaaack... and Eclipse is off to an interesting start! 

New Moon Blooper Reel

28 Dec 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Enjoy these outtakes from our recordings of New Moon!

#57: New Moon Chapter 24 and Epilogue (More Cheese and Corn)

21 Dec 2021

Contributed by Lukas

We have finished New Moon! 

#56: New Moon Chapter 23 (Stinky Deer Breath)

14 Dec 2021

Contributed by Lukas

This chapter's content is ROUGH so we laugh through it and also welcome a special guest!

#55: New Moon Chapters 21-22 (Aro Would Not Want to Touch Me)

07 Dec 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Would it kill Edward to just pretend?? Just once in his life??

#54: New Moon Chapters 19-20 (Gathered My Mandible Up)

23 Nov 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Bella is back on her BS, this time in another country. 

#53: New Moon Chapter 18 (Goof-Aw)

16 Nov 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Tune in for a live reading of why Bella and Alice have to travel to Italy! 

#52: New Moon Chapters16-17 (Wolfgang)

09 Nov 2021

Contributed by Lukas

So it turns out we're not in France...

#51: New Moon Chapter 15 (Mr. White Sparkling Crayon)

02 Nov 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Things take a turn in the plot this week and we are definitely starting a Twilight ASMR podcast.

A Conversation on Quileute Culture and Portrayal

26 Oct 2021

Contributed by Lukas

This week we take a break from New Moon to examine Quileute culture and the implications of their portrayal in the series. 

#50: New Moon Chapters 13-14 (Samantha and Mike)

19 Oct 2021

Contributed by Lukas

This week Paige and Emily share some personal stories as well as some thoughts on the unacceptable portrayal of the Quileutes in this section. 

#49: New Moon Chapter 12 (Kind of Saucy)

12 Oct 2021

Contributed by Lukas

This week we welcome new listeners and supporters as Bella discovers the truth about Jacob. 

#48: New Moon Chapter 11 (Organic Baby)

05 Oct 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Bella is going through it but really we just feel for Billy.

#47: New Moon Chapter 10 (Shoutout Mono)

28 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Join us for a live reading of some crazy antics in the meadow! 

#46: New Moon Chapters 8-9 (Transformations Abrewin‘)

14 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

This week we're covering the most awkward movie outing of all time. 

#45: New Moon Chapter 7 (My Dumplings!)

07 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

In this short chapter, Bella takes a creepy field trip and displays some sus behavior towards Jacob. 

#44: New Moon Chapters 5-6 (La Porte)

31 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

We're back with unsolicited life advice and Paige's long-awaited appearance of Jacob is finally upon us. 

#43: New Moon Chapter 4 (365 Is Divisible By 10)

24 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

In which Paige and Emily digress from talking about Bella's post-breakup life to discuss how much female misogyny is happening right now. 

#42: New Moon Chapter 3 (Snuffling)

17 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

This is the worst it'll get right? Right?

#41: New Moon Chapter 2 (There Are No More Doughnuts.)

10 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Bella and Edward are on the precipice of something bad and we wish they would just love themselves. 

#40: New Moon Chapter 1 (Lensclafters)

03 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

We are back from break and starting New Moon and things go from zero to a hundred real quick. Content warning: plot-related discussion of self-harm fr...

Midnight Sun Blooper Reel

20 Jul 2021

Contributed by Lukas

We'll be back in two weeks to start our coverage of New Moon! For now, enjoy these outtakes that didn't make it into final episodes during Midnight Su...

#39: Midnight Sun Epilogue (Just Break Up)

06 Jul 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Bella and Edward go to the prom, we are done with Midnight Sun, and Paige has some predictions for New Moon! Note: we have some minor audio issues in ...

#38: Midnight Sun Chapters 28-29 (I'm So Sick of Edward Cullen)

29 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

In which we are simultaneously sad for and 100% done with America's Vampire Edward Cullen. Catch our second to last episode covering Midnight Sun, I A...

#37: Midnight Sun Chapters 26-27 (Ortificial)

22 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

It's Emily's favorite part of Midnight Sun! There is of course still stupidity afoot. 

#36: Midnight Sun Chapter 25 (Jalice and Asper)

15 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Listen in as Paige reacts live to Midnight Sun's harrowing car chase! Content warning: discussion of self-harm from 48:28-48:47. 

#35: Midnight Sun Chapters 23-24 (We Love Libraries)

08 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Are vampires alive? Will Edward ever grow up? These questions and more...

#34: Midnight Sun Chapter 22 (That's WEIRD. That's SUSPICIOUS.)

25 May 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Bella is the only one making sense around here.

#33: Midnight Sun Chapter 21 (This Just Strikes Me As Toxic)

18 May 2021

Contributed by Lukas

This week we learn the effect that the Cullens moving to Forks had on the Quileutes and Paige and Emily have Some Thoughts. 

#32: Midnight Sun Chapter 20 (Penelope?)

11 May 2021

Contributed by Lukas

It's a short chapter this week but Emily and Paige still manage to pack a lot of discussion in. Content warning: the text covered in this episode cont...

#31: Midnight Sun Chapter 19 (Spread Like Wildflower)

04 May 2021

Contributed by Lukas

We're back from our week away and we have a rollercoaster of a chapter to cover!

#30: Midnight Sun Chapter 18 (Paradisiacal)

20 Apr 2021

Contributed by Lukas

This week we get distracted from Bella and Edward's first consensual night together to discuss feminism and free will. 

#29: Midnight Sun Chapter 17 (Just Yuck)

13 Apr 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Edward has never been more dramatic--but at last, we are through "the knot."

#28: Midnight Sun Chapter 16 (Edward's Disconnect ft. Special Guest)

06 Apr 2021

Contributed by Lukas

In this short chapter Edward suffers from a total lack of critical thinking and we welcome a guest onto the show!

#27: Midnight Sun Chapters 14-15 (Bazungas)

30 Mar 2021

Contributed by Lukas

We get another illuminating flashback and Rosalie has come up with arguably the best insult of all time. Content warning: discussion of self-harm from...

#26: Midnight Sun Chapter 13 (Puppet Fox)

23 Mar 2021

Contributed by Lukas

We are almost halfway through Midnight Sun and are learning so much about Bella through Edward's eyes.

#25: Midnight Sun Chapter 12 (Et tu, Angela?)

16 Mar 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Edward is being a Good Samaritan and Bella has something Rosalie can never have. 

#24: Midnight Sun Chapter 11 (You're in the Cash Cab)

09 Mar 2021

Contributed by Lukas

We're back with our regular episodes and Edward and Bella are back in the cafeteria!

#23: Midnight Sun Chapter 10 (Cusk)

23 Feb 2021

Contributed by Lukas

The cat's out of the bag now... P.S. Anyone who sends proof of a donation to Move to Higher Ground will receive access to our patrons-only content. Do...

#22: Midnight Sun Chapter 9 (Ribert)

16 Feb 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Mark this day on the calendar, folks: Edward Cullen is being kinda cute.

#21: Midnight Sun Chapters 7-8 (GameStonk)

09 Feb 2021

Contributed by Lukas

You can expect Rosalie discourse, some theorizing on Maria, and more on this episode!

#20: Midnight Sun Chapter 6 (De-BUSSY)

02 Feb 2021

Contributed by Lukas

In which Edward realizes he is actually an awkward teenage boy subject to the same embarrassing moments as the rest of us. Content warning: there is d...

#19: Midnight Sun Chapters 4-5 (This Is A Family Meeting)

26 Jan 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Edward breaks into Bella's house for the first time. Paige is not amused.

#18: Midnight Sun Chapter 3 (Kerplunk)

19 Jan 2021

Contributed by Lukas

It's the car accident scene, the remix! And Paige and Emily not-so-accidentally veer into some interesting tangents. 

#17: Midnight Sun Chapter 2 (Harsh and Also Cynical)

12 Jan 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Would Edward ever have fallen in love with Bella if he had been able to read her thoughts? We discuss this and more as we cover Midnight Sun Chapter 2...

#16: Midnight Sun Chapter 1 (The Cure is Leeches)

05 Jan 2021

Contributed by Lukas

We are getting a glimpse of the story we already know through brand-new eyes and Paige is enjoying it! Join us as we discuss the first chapter of Midn...

Twilight Bloopers

29 Dec 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Check out Paige and Emily's various mishaps from the Twilight recordings!

#15: Twilight Chapter 24 & Epilogue (Susan Jones)

22 Dec 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Paige has finished her first Twilight book and predicts what's coming up next! 

#14: Twilight Chapters 21-23 (Rattled)

15 Dec 2020

Contributed by Lukas

The episode's title sums it up... tune in to hear Paige's first ever live reaction!

#13: Twilight Chapters 19-20 (Spaghetti Arms)

08 Dec 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Bella is in imminent danger but at least she gets to have a hotel slumber party with her vampire pals! 

#12: Twilight Chapters 17-18 (Edwin)

01 Dec 2020

Contributed by Lukas

There's trouble in paradise...

#11: Twilight Chapters 15-16 (Let's Talk About This Khaki Skirt)

24 Nov 2020

Contributed by Lukas

This week we are thankful for introductions to Edward's family and NOT thankful for Bella's wardrobe choices.