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You've Got to Be Critting Me

Fiction

Activity Overview

Episode publication activity over the past year

Episodes

Episode 31: Fun Guy, Yeah Right

01 Dec 2025

Contributed by Lukas

The party finally begins their long-promised training with Rory, the enigmatic druid who’s been guiding Thor­mir’s connection to his mote. What s...

Episode 30: Do You Know the Mushroom Man?

17 Nov 2025

Contributed by Lukas

After their brutal battle with the bandits, tensions simmer as the party hauls their prisoners back toward Beckinsdale, only for Thormir’s glowing m...

Episode 29: Mercy or Vengeance

03 Nov 2025

Contributed by Lukas

The battle at the bandit camp reaches its breaking point as spells flare, blades clash, and tempers run hot. When one of the surviving bandits surrend...

Episode 28: Into the Bandit Camp

20 Oct 2025

Contributed by Lukas

The party pushes deeper into the woods outside Beckinsdale and finally discovers the bandit camp behind the recent burglaries. Malcius tries to talk h...

One Year Anniversary Giveaway Announcement

11 Oct 2025

Contributed by Lukas

A year ago, our party set out on a wild quest. Now, one year later, the adventure’s only just begun. Join the celebration (and maybe win some loot)!...

Episode 27: East? I Thought He Said 'Weast'

06 Oct 2025

Contributed by Lukas

The party wakes at the Brave Lion, where breakfast brings more than just food, it brings reminders of last night’s chaos. With the mysterious tree n...

Special Recap: Episodes 15-26

29 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Need to catch up before diving into the next chapter? This special recap episode of You’ve Got to Be Critting Me covers everything from Episodes 15–...

Episode 26: Thormir and the Beanstalk

22 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

A quiet night at the Lion’s Den turns into absolute chaos when Thormir plants one of Malcius’ mysterious beans. What sprouts is no ordinary garden...

Episode 25: Beans, Burglars, and Binding Shackles

08 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

The party continues their investigation into the string of burglaries plaguing the town. At the Dependable Depot, the group learns that weapons and he...

Episode 24: Let’s Get Down to Business (Eventually)

25 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

After a chaotic night at Jimbo’s farm, the party regroups at the Lion’s Den for some much-needed rest… and a questionable number of breakfast be...

Episode 23: New Cape, Who Dis?

11 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

The party wakes up after a harrowing night at Jimbo’s farm, where a mysterious giant escaped through a portal but not without promising to return. A...

Episode 22: You Can't Handle the Tooth

28 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

A mysterious giant, a moonlit battlefield, and a very revealing tooth. The party finds themselves in a chaotic showdown as they fight to stop an unexp...

Episode 21: Traps, Trips, and Trouble

14 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

The party's farmyard stakeout finally kicks off! After a night of elaborate planning, questionable traps, and plenty of animal antics, the team faces ...

Episode 20: Jimbo was his Name-O

30 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

The party’s stay in Beckinsdale takes a surprising turn as they meet a mysterious figure named Jimbo at the job board, and he's got just the kind of...

Episode 19: The Gang Goes Shopping

16 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

After surviving a battle underground, the party heads to Beckinsdale and sets their sights on something far more dangerous: shopping. Todd gets myster...

Episode 18: Well, Well, Well...

03 Jun 2025

Contributed by Lukas

The party returns to the well beneath Almore Island, determined to finish what they started. With rope in hand and tension high, they make the dangero...

Episode 17: Statue of Limitations

19 May 2025

Contributed by Lukas

The party tries to enjoy a peaceful morning in town... until Malcius drops a bombshell over breakfast: a cursed statue version of himself, born from a...

Episode 16: The Idiots and Their Beans

06 May 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Episode 16 – “The Idiots and Their Beans” Back in Sestone, the party takes a moment to rest, reconnect, and reflect, but peace is a fragile thin...

Episode 15: No One Left Behind

29 Apr 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Episode 15: No One Left BehindCornered in the dark tunnels beneath the monastery, the party faces their deadliest challenge yet - a monstrous carrion ...

Special Recap: Episodes 1–14

08 Apr 2025

Contributed by Lukas

New to You’ve Got to Be Critting Me and want to catch up fast?This special recap episode covers the story so far - from our party’s arrival in Set...

Episode 14: The Weight of a Name

07 Apr 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Episode 14: The Weight of a NameThe battle may be over, but the aftermath is just beginning. In the shadow of the rift, our heroes come face to face w...

Episode 13: The Unfated Ones

24 Mar 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Deep beneath the ruined monastery, the party’s plan teeters on the edge of discovery.With Zaharel still under Malcius’s charm, the adventurers nav...

Episode 12: Descent into Darkness

10 Mar 2025

Contributed by Lukas

In this thrilling episode of You've Got to Be Critting Me, the party ventures deeper into the treacherous ruins of the monastery. When a mysterious d...

Episode 11: Light is the Weight of Wisdom

24 Feb 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Trapped in the depths of the monastery’s ruins, our adventurers face their greatest enemy yet: puzzles. With spectral hauntings behind them and eeri...

Episode 10: Possession is Nine-Tenths of the Todd

10 Feb 2025

Contributed by Lukas

A simple exploration turns into a haunting encounter as the party delves deeper into the monastery ruins. Between eerie whispers, floating bones, and ...

Episode 9: The Curse of Common Sense

27 Jan 2025

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode, the party delves deeper into the eerie ruins of Almore Island, uncovering unsettling mysteries and facing dangerous foes. With traps,...

Episode 8: Three Blind Mice

13 Jan 2025

Contributed by Lukas

The party continues their journey through the eerie monastery, encountering unsettling visions and uncovering remnants of the past. From a tense stand...

Episode 7: Math is Hard

30 Dec 2024

Contributed by Lukas

As the party ventures further into the ominous monastery, they encounter unsettling horrors. A half-mutated man, a graveyard of rising skeletons, and ...

Episode 6: What About the Horses!?

16 Dec 2024

Contributed by Lukas

The party sails back to Sestone with Gregor’s reclaimed goods in tow, ready to fulfill their deal. As they reflect on their recent adventures, discu...

Episode 5: Gnoll Rest for the Wicked

02 Dec 2024

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode of You've Got to Be Critting Me, our adventurers find themselves navigating a smoke-filled cove as they plan a daring ambush on a...

Episode 4: Battling Bandits and Bad Dreams

18 Nov 2024

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode of You've Got to Be Critting Me, strange dreams and lingering dangers haunt our adventurers. After a night of unsettling, vivid nightm...

Episode 3: Tentacled Tavern Terrors

04 Nov 2024

Contributed by Lukas

The party dives deeper into Sestone’s mysteries, meeting a dockworker who shares unsettling rumors of missing townsfolk and ghostly sightings. But t...

Episode 2: The Tragedy of Rufus T. Boonesaw

21 Oct 2024

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode, our adventurers find themselves in a local tavern, where the drinks are strong, and the rumors are stronger. As they send off Erin an...

Episode 1: Welcome to Sestone

07 Oct 2024

Contributed by Lukas

In the very first episode of You've Got to Be Critting Me, our newly-formed adventuring party arrives in the quiet port town of Sestone, only to be th...

Episode 0: The Journey Begins

06 Oct 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Welcome to You've Got To Be Critting Me!, a live play D&D podcast where chaos, laughter, and heartfelt moments collide!In this inaugural episode, ...