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一想到家中书桌抽屉里那部刚开头的剧本《扫罗》和一叠诗稿,我就感觉奇怪。过去的许多夜晚我都在写作中度过。我们中几乎每个人都干过类似的事。但现在,它虚幻得遥不可及。自从上了战场,我们轻易就和过去的生活做了了断。我们时常试图回顾,或对这种了断做出解释,但从未真正成功。对克罗普、米勒、莱尔和我这些二十来岁,被康托列克称作“钢铁青年”的人来说,一切都极为模糊。

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