Adam Grant

I never would have expected him to care about another person.

What a great guy.

If he declines, he gets a pass, but a woman faces a penalty.

Saying no violates the unfair expectation for women to be other-oriented.

And these dynamics are often heightened for women of color.

So even though Sherry knew this might be a risk going into her job, she still wound up saying yes too often.

That is, until she got a new manager.

Sherry enlisted her manager's help.

That conversation made a difference.

It's easy to default to saying yes.

But as Sherry learned, there are big payoffs to protecting your own time and boundaries.

How do you say no without jeopardizing your reputation and relationships?

More on that after the break.

Back in 2013, the New York Times Magazine did a cover story about my research on why it's better to be a giver than a taker.

It was called, Is Giving the Secret to Getting Ahead?

And it went into detail about my efforts to help as many people as I could.

I'd become a caricature of a giver.

And after the article came out, people started seeing me as the generosity guy.

It was like a flashing neon sign for takers.

This guy will say yes to anything.