Alan Bennett

Is this a trick question?

And he's like, no, I'm telling you, you're going to carry a gun.

So when we got, I mean, obviously you can smell South Chicago seven miles before you get there.

and it looks like a war zone, and we're sitting in a Walmart, and we are the minority.

So we sat there, and he was running late.

We sat there for an hour, and when he got there,

I was like, I got to get gas, dude.

Like I sat here too long.

I had enough to get to the next town.

So he followed me.

He's like, when you get down to the gas station, you are going to remove your firearm from your holster.

You're going to hold it against your chest while you pump your gas.

And then I'm going to follow you to the on-ramp.

And that's exactly what we did.

Mid-gas pump, it was 1030 at night.

I wasn't supposed to be there.

And about six or seven little kids come running around the corner of the gas station, banging on the side of the dumpsters.

And I'm pretty sure seven of my nine lives left right then.

Oh, yeah, that's right.

They'll walk away almost every time.