Alexis Fernandez-Preiksa

Like if someone's actively trying to make your life harder than what it is consciously and on purpose, like there's many people that write in and talk about really, really toxic dynamics with friendships and families.

And I do suggest that maybe, you know, it's time.

This idea of like, oh, well, you know, I just want to hang around driven people.

And my friend who's a fucking ride or die just isn't as driven as me.

So I think I need to cut them out.

I think that's chaotic behavior, to be honest.

And I think I'm actually doing an entire plan and currently planning an entire episode on how people are kind of using and abusing therapy talk to, you know, and using the word boundary as an excuse to just be an absolute cunt and the difference between real boundary setting and acting like a selfish bitch.

So I'm actually doing an episode on that because there's so many people that become the toxic one by acting like, oh, I'm just protecting my space.

There's a massive difference between real healthy boundary setting and that.

So when we talk about environment and relationships and all of that, no, I don't think you need to cut certain people out if they, you know, oh, but all my friends always scroll and this and that or my friends aren't really, you know, unless you actually don't like these people and you don't want them in your life, in which case, by all means, be my fucking guest and cut them out.

You don't need to be cutting these people out.

You have to have control and responsibility over your own behaviors.

However, if there's certain things that you slip into when you're around these people, you can be doing certain things like speaking to your friends, being like, hey, every time I'm around you guys, I do this.

Can you just snatch the cigarette out of my hand when I'm around you?

A good friend will.

A bad friend will put a cigarette in your hand.

Well, I'm not saying a bad friend, but a friend that...

isn't really on board with it is going to put you put a cigarette in your hand you're just going to say listen love you guys so much i'm really trying to do this i need you on my side can you help me do this you're not asking them to change you're asking for support to help you change and that's where a good friend will step in and do that for you okay um prep your space prep you know

Prep things.

Like I said, you know, the outfit, the clock, the this, the that.