Alison Wood Brooks

The bigger risk is actually stagnating and lingering and staying too long. And you part ways and your partner thinks that you're sort of boring and uninteresting. So I think that the takeaway from this research is just leave.

like what power do I have even in the worst of circumstances like it's really someone's really struggling they're really awkward or they're a windbag or they're not very nice or they're boring whatever whatever the challenge is I love taking that on as a personal challenge of like how can I make this interesting how can I make this productive how can I make it fun

like what power do I have even in the worst of circumstances like it's really someone's really struggling they're really awkward or they're a windbag or they're not very nice or they're boring whatever whatever the challenge is I love taking that on as a personal challenge of like how can I make this interesting how can I make this productive how can I make it fun

like what power do I have even in the worst of circumstances like it's really someone's really struggling they're really awkward or they're a windbag or they're not very nice or they're boring whatever whatever the challenge is I love taking that on as a personal challenge of like how can I make this interesting how can I make this productive how can I make it fun

It's a sort of treasure hunt for me. And the ways that I most commonly do that and try and pursue the adventure of making it good is through question asking a lot of the time. Trying to ask questions that... help us together search for better treasure.

It's a sort of treasure hunt for me. And the ways that I most commonly do that and try and pursue the adventure of making it good is through question asking a lot of the time. Trying to ask questions that... help us together search for better treasure.

It's a sort of treasure hunt for me. And the ways that I most commonly do that and try and pursue the adventure of making it good is through question asking a lot of the time. Trying to ask questions that... help us together search for better treasure.

I know that every person out there, even those who seem boring or blustery or not that nice, I know they have something in their mind that I will be so interested to learn about and uncover. And so I like trying to figure that out. It requires giving other people the benefit of the doubt. It requires...

I know that every person out there, even those who seem boring or blustery or not that nice, I know they have something in their mind that I will be so interested to learn about and uncover. And so I like trying to figure that out. It requires giving other people the benefit of the doubt. It requires...

I know that every person out there, even those who seem boring or blustery or not that nice, I know they have something in their mind that I will be so interested to learn about and uncover. And so I like trying to figure that out. It requires giving other people the benefit of the doubt. It requires...

pushing yourself relentlessly to not be overly judgmental of people, especially when you find them unlikable or, you know, annoying. I also, I find many people to be sort of too serious and a little boring. And so I have a sort of personal mission of injecting levity. through humor, but also through warmth moves like flattery and just changing the topic to unexpected things.

pushing yourself relentlessly to not be overly judgmental of people, especially when you find them unlikable or, you know, annoying. I also, I find many people to be sort of too serious and a little boring. And so I have a sort of personal mission of injecting levity. through humor, but also through warmth moves like flattery and just changing the topic to unexpected things.

pushing yourself relentlessly to not be overly judgmental of people, especially when you find them unlikable or, you know, annoying. I also, I find many people to be sort of too serious and a little boring. And so I have a sort of personal mission of injecting levity. through humor, but also through warmth moves like flattery and just changing the topic to unexpected things.

My friend calls it breaking the pace. I like to break the pace sometimes.

My friend calls it breaking the pace. I like to break the pace sometimes.

My friend calls it breaking the pace. I like to break the pace sometimes.

So I wanna push you on this. You never know what you could uncover, even in a seemingly sort of shallow context or a shallow conversation. You never know when you're gonna see someone again. You never know if you could uncover something in that conversation that would inspire you to see them again. So even in the unlikeliest of circumstances, I just wanna push you and everyone

So I wanna push you on this. You never know what you could uncover, even in a seemingly sort of shallow context or a shallow conversation. You never know when you're gonna see someone again. You never know if you could uncover something in that conversation that would inspire you to see them again. So even in the unlikeliest of circumstances, I just wanna push you and everyone

So I wanna push you on this. You never know what you could uncover, even in a seemingly sort of shallow context or a shallow conversation. You never know when you're gonna see someone again. You never know if you could uncover something in that conversation that would inspire you to see them again. So even in the unlikeliest of circumstances, I just wanna push you and everyone

to consider the idea that maybe it doesn't have to be as shallow as it first appears. I teach about this in my course at Harvard. There's this topic pyramid with three levels. At the base of the pyramid, this is where small talk lives. This is topics you could talk about with anybody, let's say at a dinner party or a cocktail party.