Alison Wood Brooks

Wow, that's an amazing story, Alison. And it's really testament to what happens when we handle difficult conversations well, that there is a huge payoff here, a huge psychological payoff here.

Wow, that's an amazing story, Alison. And it's really testament to what happens when we handle difficult conversations well, that there is a huge payoff here, a huge psychological payoff here.

Yeah. And don't get me wrong. It was scary to have that conversation. It felt like, you know, she didn't like the students. She was mad at us all the time. We were always in trouble. And there was so much historical animosity that I was trying to sort of undo and shake up. And it took a lot of chutzpah, sort of a lot of courage to go in there and try and sort of work through it. It wasn't easy.

Yeah. And don't get me wrong. It was scary to have that conversation. It felt like, you know, she didn't like the students. She was mad at us all the time. We were always in trouble. And there was so much historical animosity that I was trying to sort of undo and shake up. And it took a lot of chutzpah, sort of a lot of courage to go in there and try and sort of work through it. It wasn't easy.

Yeah. And don't get me wrong. It was scary to have that conversation. It felt like, you know, she didn't like the students. She was mad at us all the time. We were always in trouble. And there was so much historical animosity that I was trying to sort of undo and shake up. And it took a lot of chutzpah, sort of a lot of courage to go in there and try and sort of work through it. It wasn't easy.

One of the incredibly difficult and incredibly powerful things that you did was that you apologized to her for the way that she had been treated in the past. And I think for people who feel like they have been wronged or people who are in opposition, there's often a sense of, you know, sort of burning injustice. You know, I'm just an administrator. I'm here trying to keep the students safe.

One of the incredibly difficult and incredibly powerful things that you did was that you apologized to her for the way that she had been treated in the past. And I think for people who feel like they have been wronged or people who are in opposition, there's often a sense of, you know, sort of burning injustice. You know, I'm just an administrator. I'm here trying to keep the students safe.

One of the incredibly difficult and incredibly powerful things that you did was that you apologized to her for the way that she had been treated in the past. And I think for people who feel like they have been wronged or people who are in opposition, there's often a sense of, you know, sort of burning injustice. You know, I'm just an administrator. I'm here trying to keep the students safe.

You know, all they have is ill will toward me. They treat me so badly. No one recognizes what I've done. And so you have this narrative in your head of all the ways in which the world has been unkind to you. And of course, the world doesn't constantly come and admit that. But when someone actually walks in the door and says, I'm sorry, it has a transformative effect on you.

You know, all they have is ill will toward me. They treat me so badly. No one recognizes what I've done. And so you have this narrative in your head of all the ways in which the world has been unkind to you. And of course, the world doesn't constantly come and admit that. But when someone actually walks in the door and says, I'm sorry, it has a transformative effect on you.

You know, all they have is ill will toward me. They treat me so badly. No one recognizes what I've done. And so you have this narrative in your head of all the ways in which the world has been unkind to you. And of course, the world doesn't constantly come and admit that. But when someone actually walks in the door and says, I'm sorry, it has a transformative effect on you.

Can you talk a little bit about the power of apologies in the course of having difficult conversations.

Can you talk a little bit about the power of apologies in the course of having difficult conversations.

Can you talk a little bit about the power of apologies in the course of having difficult conversations.

I think as a conversation researcher, as a human being, apologies are one of the most powerful tools we have in our conversational toolkit. They are so remarkably powerful. And they're quick, right? It doesn't take that many turns of a conversation to deliver an apology. And they can do so much good. And even though they're so powerful, many people are reluctant to give them.

I think as a conversation researcher, as a human being, apologies are one of the most powerful tools we have in our conversational toolkit. They are so remarkably powerful. And they're quick, right? It doesn't take that many turns of a conversation to deliver an apology. And they can do so much good. And even though they're so powerful, many people are reluctant to give them.

I think as a conversation researcher, as a human being, apologies are one of the most powerful tools we have in our conversational toolkit. They are so remarkably powerful. And they're quick, right? It doesn't take that many turns of a conversation to deliver an apology. And they can do so much good. And even though they're so powerful, many people are reluctant to give them.

Talk a little bit about that. Why do you think that is, Alison? Given how powerful they are, why are we so reluctant to deploy them?

Talk a little bit about that. Why do you think that is, Alison? Given how powerful they are, why are we so reluctant to deploy them?

Talk a little bit about that. Why do you think that is, Alison? Given how powerful they are, why are we so reluctant to deploy them?