Ari Matti

Three people at the bar, raffle, belt, championship. So I go, okay, how much the ticket? He goes, 10 bucks a raffle. Unbelievable. One ticket. It's a no brainer. I go, give me 30. Yeah. Yeah. He goes, what? I go, give me 40. So I got... 40 tickets. I got 40 fucking raffle tickets. I spread them out at my bar. Three other fucks. I'm getting this belt. I spread them out at the bar.

I took a selfie to my friends. I'm like, oh my God, I'm going to be a champion. You know. I'm high-fiving Tito. Hell yeah. So then, first round, they pull the vodka. Of course I win the vodka. I have all the fucking tickets. Yeah. I'm guessing a bottle of Tito's. Yeah, and fuck the vodka. It's just sprayed out. I don't have carry-on anyway. I want the belt. Exactly. Dude, my flight is at 4 a.m.

I took a selfie to my friends. I'm like, oh my God, I'm going to be a champion. You know. I'm high-fiving Tito. Hell yeah. So then, first round, they pull the vodka. Of course I win the vodka. I have all the fucking tickets. Yeah. I'm guessing a bottle of Tito's. Yeah, and fuck the vodka. It's just sprayed out. I don't have carry-on anyway. I want the belt. Exactly. Dude, my flight is at 4 a.m.

I took a selfie to my friends. I'm like, oh my God, I'm going to be a champion. You know. I'm high-fiving Tito. Hell yeah. So then, first round, they pull the vodka. Of course I win the vodka. I have all the fucking tickets. Yeah. I'm guessing a bottle of Tito's. Yeah, and fuck the vodka. It's just sprayed out. I don't have carry-on anyway. I want the belt. Exactly. Dude, my flight is at 4 a.m.

$400.

$400.

$400.

Dude, fuck you. I didn't even get a picture with Tito. Today Tito post, our champ at Tito's Cantina last night. Takes a picture with the retard. He goes, everyone had a great night. Oh, did they? Where's my fucking belt? I didn't even get a t-shirt. Look, this is me and my raffles. This is me and my fucking raffles.

Dude, fuck you. I didn't even get a picture with Tito. Today Tito post, our champ at Tito's Cantina last night. Takes a picture with the retard. He goes, everyone had a great night. Oh, did they? Where's my fucking belt? I didn't even get a t-shirt. Look, this is me and my raffles. This is me and my fucking raffles.

Dude, fuck you. I didn't even get a picture with Tito. Today Tito post, our champ at Tito's Cantina last night. Takes a picture with the retard. He goes, everyone had a great night. Oh, did they? Where's my fucking belt? I didn't even get a t-shirt. Look, this is me and my raffles. This is me and my fucking raffles.

Yeah, dude, I would look... Dude, imagine today I come out.

Yeah, dude, I would look... Dude, imagine today I come out.

Yeah, dude, I would look... Dude, imagine today I come out.

Yo, yo, happy Easter! I love how religious Americans are. On God! Estonia is one of the most atheist countries in the world. You ask an Estonian, do you believe in a higher power? We're like, I don't even believe in myself. Dude, you tell us there's an afterlife, we're like, fuck, there's more? Can I just fucking die? I went on a date with like a religious girl here, she's Catholic.

Yo, yo, happy Easter! I love how religious Americans are. On God! Estonia is one of the most atheist countries in the world. You ask an Estonian, do you believe in a higher power? We're like, I don't even believe in myself. Dude, you tell us there's an afterlife, we're like, fuck, there's more? Can I just fucking die? I went on a date with like a religious girl here, she's Catholic.

Yo, yo, happy Easter! I love how religious Americans are. On God! Estonia is one of the most atheist countries in the world. You ask an Estonian, do you believe in a higher power? We're like, I don't even believe in myself. Dude, you tell us there's an afterlife, we're like, fuck, there's more? Can I just fucking die? I went on a date with like a religious girl here, she's Catholic.

And then after the date, we go to her place and she's like, don't worry, we can still do anal. I love how religious chicks treat their asshole like an offshore account in the Bahamas. It's outside the jurisdiction. I love how she thinks she's gonna get to the pearly gates. God is gonna be like, what the fuck? And she's like, ah, ah, ah, you never said.

And then after the date, we go to her place and she's like, don't worry, we can still do anal. I love how religious chicks treat their asshole like an offshore account in the Bahamas. It's outside the jurisdiction. I love how she thinks she's gonna get to the pearly gates. God is gonna be like, what the fuck? And she's like, ah, ah, ah, you never said.

And then after the date, we go to her place and she's like, don't worry, we can still do anal. I love how religious chicks treat their asshole like an offshore account in the Bahamas. It's outside the jurisdiction. I love how she thinks she's gonna get to the pearly gates. God is gonna be like, what the fuck? And she's like, ah, ah, ah, you never said.

And God's got to be like, ah, get in here, you little slut. Thank you so much.