Ariana Madix

A roller coaster.

I mean, truly like the lowest lows, I think maybe ever, maybe since my dad died that I've experienced.

And then I wouldn't say the highest highs, but I would definitely say that there's been like some really amazing bright spots.

And it sometimes feels like,

don't know like a ping-pong match in between those two extremes right I have a tendency to like compartmentalize a little bit with emotions it's the Virgo moon in me but it's weird because also sometimes when I'm like oh my gosh I'm doing I'm feeling good like things are really positive then people on the internet will be like why is she must have not cared they're like mad at me and

for like healing, but then they like, you know, but that's the thing is it's like, everyone's always going to have an opinion about like how you should live.

Totally.

So they had like one more song after that.

And so I was holding like my phone and his phone just kind of as a stack and had no like there's nothing weird about that.

I mean, we were together for nine years, like me holding on to his phone, his, you know, his laptop, his phone.

you know, whatever is not weird.

So they had like one more song.

And then afterwards, I got up to go over to him and tell him, like, good job and give him his phone back.

And he was talking to some other of the band members.

So he's a little preoccupied.

He's a little busy.

And I was like, OK.

And then literally, I just in that moment, I was standing in the back of Tom Tom and I just was like, I don't know.

I was just like.

it felt like i like divine intervention or something because you know i've always been very hesitant to become like the snooper because i always feel like anytime you snoop in anyone's stuff even if they're not guilty of doing anything wrong you always end up finding something you don't want to find or seeing something you don't want to see and i always feel like it's a slippery slope because once you look once then you want to it becomes an addiction because i've been like that in past relationships