Bill Burr

It's like, you know, a lot of the shit that we say, like if somebody actually said it to you, you would be offended. But to watch somebody say it to somebody else is like really, uh, It's really funny. So anyway, we're cruising right along and the crowds have been have been great. I did want to do stand up last night, but I went to go jump on the subway. Kind of fucking annoyed me.

I went down the stairs and these people were coming up and they don't say anything to me. And I go all the way down the stairs in the fucking subway. The turnstiles had, like, the police tape on it. Like, they weren't using it. It's like, you could have fucking said something, you cunts. And I go down there, and then it smelled horrifically, horrifically of fucking urine.

I went down the stairs and these people were coming up and they don't say anything to me. And I go all the way down the stairs in the fucking subway. The turnstiles had, like, the police tape on it. Like, they weren't using it. It's like, you could have fucking said something, you cunts. And I go down there, and then it smelled horrifically, horrifically of fucking urine.

I went down the stairs and these people were coming up and they don't say anything to me. And I go all the way down the stairs in the fucking subway. The turnstiles had, like, the police tape on it. Like, they weren't using it. It's like, you could have fucking said something, you cunts. And I go down there, and then it smelled horrifically, horrifically of fucking urine.

I got to tell you, that fucking Bloomberg, man, he fucked this city up so goddamn bad with this bullshit. Like, taking a cab now, it's slower than walking. He completely eviscerated Broadway. He stuck fucking tables and chairs in the middle of the fucking street. And I was walking through Times Square and there was this fucking guy sitting there. Like, drug addict, homeless or whatever.

I got to tell you, that fucking Bloomberg, man, he fucked this city up so goddamn bad with this bullshit. Like, taking a cab now, it's slower than walking. He completely eviscerated Broadway. He stuck fucking tables and chairs in the middle of the fucking street. And I was walking through Times Square and there was this fucking guy sitting there. Like, drug addict, homeless or whatever.

I got to tell you, that fucking Bloomberg, man, he fucked this city up so goddamn bad with this bullshit. Like, taking a cab now, it's slower than walking. He completely eviscerated Broadway. He stuck fucking tables and chairs in the middle of the fucking street. And I was walking through Times Square and there was this fucking guy sitting there. Like, drug addict, homeless or whatever.

He was picking a scab to the left of his navel. And whatever he was picking off his fucking exposed belly, he was wiping on the table. I think Bloomberg's heart was in the right place. But it's like, dude, you can't completely abandon the public educational system. Let our food supply be turned into poison.

He was picking a scab to the left of his navel. And whatever he was picking off his fucking exposed belly, he was wiping on the table. I think Bloomberg's heart was in the right place. But it's like, dude, you can't completely abandon the public educational system. Let our food supply be turned into poison.

He was picking a scab to the left of his navel. And whatever he was picking off his fucking exposed belly, he was wiping on the table. I think Bloomberg's heart was in the right place. But it's like, dude, you can't completely abandon the public educational system. Let our food supply be turned into poison.

And give us these stupid iPhones and think that you just... And then simultaneously, you're just going to throw tables and chairs in the street and it's going to become Paris. It's not how it works. All right? We're fucking animals. You got to bring us inside first and get us house trained before you try to, you know, recreate as they do on Instagram.

And give us these stupid iPhones and think that you just... And then simultaneously, you're just going to throw tables and chairs in the street and it's going to become Paris. It's not how it works. All right? We're fucking animals. You got to bring us inside first and get us house trained before you try to, you know, recreate as they do on Instagram.

And give us these stupid iPhones and think that you just... And then simultaneously, you're just going to throw tables and chairs in the street and it's going to become Paris. It's not how it works. All right? We're fucking animals. You got to bring us inside first and get us house trained before you try to, you know, recreate as they do on Instagram.

You ever see that when the Americans try to recreate the cafe experience in America? You ever see those things? It's fucking hilarious because, you know... Even like a lot of big cities, like there's not a lot of good like sitting out on the sidewalk and watching people go by. That's why I kind of like, you know, the parks and stuff, you know. You get like a nice park bench.

You ever see that when the Americans try to recreate the cafe experience in America? You ever see those things? It's fucking hilarious because, you know... Even like a lot of big cities, like there's not a lot of good like sitting out on the sidewalk and watching people go by. That's why I kind of like, you know, the parks and stuff, you know. You get like a nice park bench.

You ever see that when the Americans try to recreate the cafe experience in America? You ever see those things? It's fucking hilarious because, you know... Even like a lot of big cities, like there's not a lot of good like sitting out on the sidewalk and watching people go by. That's why I kind of like, you know, the parks and stuff, you know. You get like a nice park bench.

There's people going by either cutting through the park, working out, fucking weirdos, musicians, sociopath, fucking, you know, Wall Street tech guys, you know. You just look at them going like, I wonder if they have like a solid platinum axe in their house. And they listen to Huey Lewis. I know that scene is fucking nuts, but how sick is that fucking axe? Anyway, plowing ahead here.

There's people going by either cutting through the park, working out, fucking weirdos, musicians, sociopath, fucking, you know, Wall Street tech guys, you know. You just look at them going like, I wonder if they have like a solid platinum axe in their house. And they listen to Huey Lewis. I know that scene is fucking nuts, but how sick is that fucking axe? Anyway, plowing ahead here.

There's people going by either cutting through the park, working out, fucking weirdos, musicians, sociopath, fucking, you know, Wall Street tech guys, you know. You just look at them going like, I wonder if they have like a solid platinum axe in their house. And they listen to Huey Lewis. I know that scene is fucking nuts, but how sick is that fucking axe? Anyway, plowing ahead here.

I'm totally into fucking MotoGP. I've had the time being out here to get into this stuff. What is it? COTA is next, right? Circuit of the Americas down there in Austin. Unfortunately, I won't be able to make the race this year because I'm working here in New York, obviously, but very excited about that. And, you know, I want to see is like this, you know, Mark Marquez thing is just crazy.