Brandon Novak

to 5,000 push-ups, you can fuck off. Yeah, that would spaz you. I have one of my mom's—someone my mom knows got dishonorably discharged from what I heard of just waking up and being like, get the fuck away from me. And they're like, dude, you're out of here.

Like, how do you, what is like the thought, is it even a thought process or is it just like a, like a genuine, just like urge at that point in time for me?

Yeah, so you're saying like... I'm like the process of like having, I guess, that urge versus like, you know, like you said, in some way you kind of know like, yeah, this isn't going to go well. So I remember. You just have to. I have to do it.

You don't like a mister? No. I love mister.

Yeah, I wouldn't think so.

Jesus, man.

Yeah, that's a good explanation of it. Because I know it's not like a thing with words. It's just kind of like you know, you also don't. It's pretty fucking rugged, man.

Yeah, that is the thing. I feel like addiction, it is like a... It's almost like a weird spiritual practice if you think about it. You just kind of, like, rather than, like, meditating, you're just getting so fucking high all the time that your life just collapses, and then now you have to really kind of... It gives people, I think, a deeper appreciation for life if they make it through it.

And that's the thing, right?

Really? And that's what I've heard before. Wasn't that what AA was founded on? The guy Bill?

Went to Carl Young, and he was like, bro, either find God or you're toast. Yeah. In a way.

Yeah, that's everyone I've known. Totally.

Do you remember what kind of kicked that off exactly or was it just kind of like –

Yeah. So what did that look like in terms of like, you're saying like the personal pain, was it like, like obviously like there's probably physical discomfort and all that stuff, but like just like alienation from everyone you've ever known? Were you like kind of like kicking yourself over like how much better things could have went? Like what was like the real primer?

Yeah, that was something that blew my mind during COVID, and I, like, mentioned this before, but I still can't get over it.

Like, I would, I didn't realize how much I did this, but, like, especially during, like, like, so before COVID, I didn't know that I was really doing this, but I'd go through a supermarket, and, like, every person I saw, it would just be this, like, weird, invisible battle in my head where I'd be, like, look at this fucking guy's fucking pussy jerk off.

Yeah.

So you knew even just heading all the way there, you're, like, just something flipped.

Yeah, and you're talking – when you say that, you mean like yourself basically or like – because it sounds to me like it's like – like you were saying like, yeah, fucking heroin. Yeah, yeah. Keep making me fucking do it when in reality it is like it's yourself. Yeah. Nobody – even without drugs, nobody wants to admit that like they're a complete problem.

And then I would see a lady, and, like, fucking chick's not even hot. Is she looking at me? No, she's not. Fucking bitch. Yeah. And you're doing this like crazy maniacal thing in your head. And then COVID, it came to a fever pitch because there was like the mask first, no mask.

Yeah, dude, it does. It can fuck you up, man. You can, yeah, it can really fuck you up. You can do anything and just be like, get something in your head. Like, Oh, I'm not good enough. Totally. And then it just snowballs. Yeah. It's kind of fucked up. It's insane.

Oh, nice. It's been a while.

Yeah, dude, I remember that was like a weird shock for me. I went to school for social work for a while, a couple years ago, and I would get inmates housing. That was a thing I did for one of the field placements. And then there was this one guy who was a fucking pain in my ass. He'd always call me and just be like, you're not doing shit, blah, blah, blah. Sure.

He was under the gun because they were going to take his kid, a bunch of shit if he didn't find appropriate housing. And, uh, and I remember the day I found him a house, we're both in this place and I called him up and I was like, yo, dude, we got it. And he, it like, we both were so happy. And I was like, that was such a funny. Yeah. For something so dumb. I mean, it's a big deal. It's a house.

And then it was like, it was just like, it just all came to a head where I was like, dude, why am I this stressed while taking a walk? And I started doing a thing where like, when I would be out at a grocery store, I would really focus on not having like a silent battle against people. And instead just like wishing strangers well. And like you were saying, exuding that, whatever that energy is.

But I remember like I won this like comedy contest and I was like, this is it. And then I got the guy house. It was literally the same feeling again. It was the same exact feeling of like timing and opportunity to create a beautiful outcome. But it is a weird thing.

That was, like, a weird thing for me when I was, like, oh, you can get just as happy for doing nice things for people as you can, like, you know, achieving some sort of personal victory. Yeah, any monetary fucking victory. Exactly.

It is, honestly, I would argue that, like, when you do something, like, awesome for a person, I think it feels better than if you, like, if you just, like, kill it in some way with, like, a sales thing. Straight up. Yeah.

Yeah, that is a nice thing. And it's one of those things, too. It's one of those things I think people sneer at. They're like, making the world better. It's like, what the fuck else are you going to do? You should be a dickhead all the time. But it's like, I feel bad for, personally, it's like, so you have, you know, people, they go through, you know, drug addiction.

There's like this whole thing. It's like, you know, everyone, when, you know, I would imagine you're a drug addict. There's like a part of it. Like everyone knows I'm an addict. People are talking shit on me, everyone, blah, blah, blah. But then it almost like you're like, you reach a point where you're like, I don't give a fuck. And that's like a very freeing experience eventually.

Whereas there's people who don't,

ever you know fall into a deep uh drug addiction but they never get to really face their own like self-defeating mental patterns and in a way it's almost like the person in my opinion who goes through addiction and gets out of that ends up having i think a richer existence than if you never really have to face that or come like face to face with yourself and like really look at yourself because there's people who get through life good on you know on paper but it's like you know they're tortured absolutely it's like i always thought it was like a shame

Because everyone I know who's in recovery is very open. Almost like you can tell. It's like, okay, this person really has turned a corner because it's like something switches. Nobody really knows exactly what that is, but it really is. The most consistent factor is having some sort of spiritual experience or an awakening experience.

Mr. Novak, how you doing, bro? Man. How do you like the mister? I've been trying to be way more respectful lately. Have you?

Totally. Dude, I felt so much more comfortable in public after that. Yeah, yeah. It was like a revelation for me.

So that's crazy. You really didn't think people were like hip to you at all?

I was the last person.

That's really funny.

Like all this nonsense.

So it snowball affected into this. Yeah. Yeah. It's just crossing that like threshold, even consider the possibility. It was so simple, though. I missed it. I overlooked it. Yeah, dude, I think most people go their whole life without ever saying it.

When you say right-sized, sorry, what do you mean?

Hear me out here. I failed to promote my shows in the Irvine Improv, SoCal. I'm so fucking SoCal. I forgot to do the ads or make a flyer for the Irvine show. Eeps. My bad. It's next weekend. Thanksgiving weekend. Friday, November 29th. Saturday, November 30th. Two days. Fo' shows. Come out to motherfucking Irvine Improv. Um... And I'll be honest, I'm not just saying this because I'm doing a show.

I love Irvine. Irvine was the first place I went to in California. And I was telling someone recently, I'm like, I fucking love Irvine. And they lived in L.A. And I'm like, are you kidding? Are you trying to be funny? I'm like, no, why? And apparently everyone from L.A. just snubs Irvine. Like, I would never. Fuck you guys, dude. Irvine rules. L.A. 's fucking bullshit. Irvine.

We're talking Laguna Beach. We're talking motherfucking Newport Beach. Conservative-ass stronghold down there in SoCal, dude. Shit. Come out. I love Irvine. It's literally the first place I went to in California. I'm very excited to go there. I'm going to bring my whole motherfucking family. We're all going to do Thanksgiving out there. It's going to be sick.

So Irvine Improv, Friday, November 29th, Saturday, November 30th. Let's go. Let's show these L.A. fucking pussies, dude, who's really fucking SoCal. They're not fucking SoCal. They're north of Irvine. Yeah. So how did you get into the recovery homes? When did you start that? And like, what was that like?

So are you all like, do you fuck with like the Instagram and all that shit? Yeah, I like that.

Yeah.

Where's the authority problem you think come from? My fucking father. He was a crazy drug addict, Hell's Angel guy.

So you're busting the suds for a while. Yeah. How did you get into the...

That's cool.

Yeah, what was your, do you have any, like, when you went to any treatment centers, did you have ones that you felt like, because you hear some people, like, I placed a fucking scam, they're just fucking taking my money. Like, did you have any places you thought were just, like, churning people in and out, or do you think that's just people's, like, perception of the place?

Yeah, true.

Yeah, finally they fucking gave me a happy ending with a massage and they played my favorite song. That might turn me around.

You're right. That's not the deal. Yeah, true. I wish. There is a very unsexy element to it where you're saying like, yeah, you can be in like a place that people think sucks really badly. Straight up. It really is a wholly internal thing.

Yeah, yeah. Straight up. What do you think about the California sobriety people do where it's like, I'm California sober. I'll drink and smoke weed and shit.

yeah that makes sense so it's kind of a personal yeah timeline for everybody for sure and yeah it's like and I'm not saying that my way is the right way it's just my fucking way yeah because I know that's a big battle when I was in social work school there's like people who are like it's called like harm reduction versus people who are like

Yeah, yeah. And that's where I'd probably be. Yeah, well, it is funny. People, I've talked about this before, but it is funny how that is like... The God talk's taboo now. Totally. Before it was like you couldn't talk about sex. Now you can be like, I'm fucking jizzing. Everyone's like, ah. But if you're like... Yeah, they had the whole B2 movement at that point. True. Yeah.

But if you mentioned God, people were like, what the fuck?

And it's like a pretty wholesome, you know, I think it's a very wholesome concept. But it got tainted by, I think, people just being like... Like the religion aspect of being like, you're going to hell because you fucking came. For sure.

Yeah.

Yeah. And I wonder if that's, if it's going to like, cause every, even like religions, like concepts of God, like go through waves where it's like, we used to think it was like fucking fire. And now we are like, there was like the mythological hero of like, there's these entities in the sky that we can like, you know, be like, Hey, please help us. That'll like change everything.

And then like that, like around like an organized, like Testament of like, you know, this is, this is the guy who came down from heaven and I'm Nita. So now I wonder if it is going to regroup in like some different conception that people universally buy into over. It'll just be like a fractured thing forever. Yeah.

No, that's true. So, and then, you know, I'm curious too. So you were doing the, the Viva of the Bam stuff and all that stuff fell out. Like what, so what happened with all of like all the people from Jackass, you guys all, you guys all still talk or like where, where did like, it was like a big falling out or like what happened?

Yeah, it is funny, especially if you think about the origins of, like, Jackass was, like, the possibly unhealthiest, most insane way of living possible. And it was so fucking fun to watch. It was awesome. But it is funny to come full circle and be like, no, we've all actually chilled out immensely.

Yeah, it's pretty cool, man. And it's also one of those things like, you know, sobriety, again, if you're just kind of kicking around, you're going out to get drinks every Sunday, you don't necessarily have, you know, like, let's say like a problem quote.

It is one of those things that I think when you're, you know, drinking a lot or, like, partying, it's, like, it almost seems alien.

But it, like, if you really, like, strip it down from, like, you know, take substances out of it, I always thought it's a really, like, it's cool for a person to be able to remain with their thoughts in their own state of consciousness rather than, you know, you constantly escape it. Totally. And you're constantly jumping out, jumping out, jumping out.

But I think it is, like, a serious, like, sign of mental strength to, like, And people do, like, Sober October, which that must be kind of funny. Like, the whole world's like, we're going to be sober for one month. You're like, all right. But I've seen me do that. So, like, fuck yeah. I'm all about it. True, true. But it's got to be funny. You have, like, 10 years.

Like, oh, I'm glad you're having fun. For sure. There is something, I think, that is, like, especially the older you get, it's like, it does take mental strength to, like, sit with yourself, you know, not being able to kind of leave your consciousness, like, a little bit by, you know, doing, like, oh, I want to get a little high. I want to do this, blah, blah, blah. Totally.

And I think it's like it's a genuine virtue that I think gets skipped over. People are kind of like, yeah, dude, fuck off. I'm going to have a couple of beers. Fuck that. People kind of dismiss it a lot, especially when you're drinking. But I always thought it was like a – it's hard to do. It's like it's very hard to do.

And it takes like – you know, when you can't kind of jump out of yourself for a little bit, it forces you to work through, you know, the kind of, you know, whatever, broken gears in your head.

Right.

Sure. Yeah.

When you say you have a job of note, what do you mean?

No, it's pretty sick, man. Yeah. I'm happy for you, man. That's awesome.

Yeah, and I always, like you were saying, the service thing's big because especially when you're like, you know, if you're in a, even with the route drugs, if you're just like living a negative existence, you're usually convinced like in order to conquer my own negative existence, I have to achieve at some level that just somehow like shuts all this down and people will realize and they'll like me.

Whereas like in recovery, it's like, or you can just like help people. Yeah. And it gets the same thing. If you're like lonely, it's like, well, rather than trying to be the man, just go volunteer. Yeah. And you'll get that. Like, it's like a quick route into kind of like a social, a nice social existence. And everyone is just like, no, I have to conquer the world. Yeah. It's too easy.

It's too simple. It's really funny. I always thought it was kind of funny.

I'm sure that's got to be like, it's really rewarding too. Like you were saying, having the groups and seeing like even a couple people

kind of take off because i guess if you really look at the recovery homes it's like if this doesn't work for me this whole place is bullshit or it'd be like for sure you gotta someone's got to do some things what is it is there is like the opiate with overdoses going down are they still going up or like i'm not a big stats guy i don't look at numbers i just kind of fucking remain ignorant to it and live in my own world yeah well you don't hear about it as much anymore it like dominated everything for a while after covid alcohol became a big thing

Wow. Come back.

Yeah. You know, I've heard that I've, I've known people who have like off the heroin meth comes into the picture and they're like, damn, I'm actually super productive.

You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah.

Do you think they should legalize drugs? Do you think that'd be easier to help people or do you think it would make things worse?

Yeah, I don't think it would. I think they did this in London or Britain, whatever.

Exactly. You're under like—you're in like a doctor's bench. Yeah.

For sure, for sure. So there's two sides to every fucking coin. Yeah. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, then, you know, with that, you're going to have people, like, pop a door handle and all that shit. It's like, yeah, because you're, like, not here. Straight up.

That makes sense.

At least you're honest because I heard people be like, I wouldn't care and it's like... But yeah.

Let's put it that way.

For sure. Yeah. Everybody would.

Yeah, man. It goes that far. It's crazy. And again, like you were saying, people get kind of mired in the cliche of it, but it is pretty nuts to think about that. If that guy that day had been like, fuck him, I don't feel like doing this. Straight up. You were saying, mom's upset, you're burning bridges, you're ripping shit off, you're going to jail, all this shit. And it's like...

It's pretty crazy.

Nice, man. Of all of. For sure. I know what you're saying. Yeah, it can be done.

Yeah. Take me back through that. So what was like, how did you, like, what's your story? Like, how did you get into that? Obviously you're saying like, you know, family or, you know, home life, not great. And then like, eventually to like, you know, gaining a ton of notoriety. Like, what was that like for you going from like the beginning to like the thick of all that stuff?

No, that makes sense. That's fucking awesome, man.

Well, dude, I think that's it, man. Thank you so much, bro. I really appreciate this. I'm pumped to hear about that. And I enjoyed it too, man. I'm really happy to hear, you know, it's good to hear people taking their time to help the world. Like that's still a thing. Cause I think a lot of people for sure just get so, and it's, it's not like a bad thing. I would say I'm guilty of it too.

Getting consumed in the rat race. I'm the worst. Yeah. I have to jump out of it every day. What the fuck am I doing with myself?

Daily. Yeah.

Yeah. Right?

Well, thank you so much.

you

Yeah. Who played him on Tony Hawk for sure.

Was it Boards and Blades?

I was a young boy at Boards and Blades, and you would see Bam and Swab come through, and I'd be like, oh, fuck.

Yeah, that was always legendary. You guys would come. We were like 12.

Like, this fucking rules, dude. I'm going to get sponsored.

So I'm like,

I see what you're saying. Damn, I thought I had a problem with authority. I just have an Irish Catholic father who spanked my hiney. And I'm like, dude, I don't want to hear it. That's a wet dream for me, you cocksucker.

And you were maintaining relative sobriety? No, no.

Mine must be nothing because I think that is real. The link to authority problems is just your relationship with your dad.

What was it? This is your first book, right? The first book, Dream Seller. Dream Seller. That's a nice title too.

Yeah, can you put that into words? I'm always kind of fascinated by that when it's like, because it is obvious to anyone who's done on drugs, when you know someone who's on drugs, you're like, dude, if you just don't do drugs, you won't have as many problems. And they're like... I have to do them.