Brendon Burchard

I got all this hate early in my career because I started teaching that there's three kinds of friends. and three kinds of people in your life. There's old friends, your high school people and other people, different parts of your life. You never talk to them again. They were just like, they were that chapter in your life. You don't see them again and you're fine with it.

And sometimes they reach out to you and they're like, they're trying to come into your new chapter, but they're like, that was that chapter. And sometimes you need to be okay that that was that chapter. So you have to say, you're an old friend now. It's less time, less experience, you know? And then you have your maintenance friends. the people you see just enough to maintain the friendship.

And sometimes they reach out to you and they're like, they're trying to come into your new chapter, but they're like, that was that chapter. And sometimes you need to be okay that that was that chapter. So you have to say, you're an old friend now. It's less time, less experience, you know? And then you have your maintenance friends. the people you see just enough to maintain the friendship.

You text them just enough, you reach out just enough, just enough, it's maintenance. It doesn't mean they can't be good friends. And then you have growth friends. You expand the itinerary of things you do together. You want to spend more time and see each other and you're trying new things and growth friends are the best. Your job is to get as many of those as you can.

You text them just enough, you reach out just enough, just enough, it's maintenance. It doesn't mean they can't be good friends. And then you have growth friends. You expand the itinerary of things you do together. You want to spend more time and see each other and you're trying new things and growth friends are the best. Your job is to get as many of those as you can.

It doesn't mean these other ones don't exist. It just means you have to kind of align it. And if you have somebody who is extremely, the worst people to have in your life are people who are discouraging towards you. Not that they're mean to you. There's lots of mean people. But even mean people who are critical or funny, like I have a lot of friends who are like super British.

It doesn't mean these other ones don't exist. It just means you have to kind of align it. And if you have somebody who is extremely, the worst people to have in your life are people who are discouraging towards you. Not that they're mean to you. There's lots of mean people. But even mean people who are critical or funny, like I have a lot of friends who are like super British.

And I mean, that's like, they cut you down. They're so smart with the cynicism. Like, and I'm not a cynical person, so I'm just getting killed by these guys. But it's out of love. It's out of love, I guess. And I'm an easy person to make fun of me. Look at me. But they're so cynical and funny. And I wish I could be like that. I can't come back with a quick quip at them. So they just demolish me.

And I mean, that's like, they cut you down. They're so smart with the cynicism. Like, and I'm not a cynical person, so I'm just getting killed by these guys. But it's out of love. It's out of love, I guess. And I'm an easy person to make fun of me. Look at me. But they're so cynical and funny. And I wish I could be like that. I can't come back with a quick quip at them. So they just demolish me.

But they're encouraging of my dreams. And so if someone is discouraging you of you growing... And whatever that way is, they're controlling you, speaking down to you, shutting you down. Your job is to decrease your time towards them in whatever way it can. Sometimes that means a separation relationship. Sometimes it means a divorce. That's extreme. Other times it's like, you know what?

But they're encouraging of my dreams. And so if someone is discouraging you of you growing... And whatever that way is, they're controlling you, speaking down to you, shutting you down. Your job is to decrease your time towards them in whatever way it can. Sometimes that means a separation relationship. Sometimes it means a divorce. That's extreme. Other times it's like, you know what?

I'm not going to go to have brunch with this person every other Sunday. She's bumming me out. And you just got to find out like if someone's bumming you out, You need to be assertive in that situation and let them know, hey, you're kind of bumming me out. Actually, I need some encouragement and I want us to be good friends.

I'm not going to go to have brunch with this person every other Sunday. She's bumming me out. And you just got to find out like if someone's bumming you out, You need to be assertive in that situation and let them know, hey, you're kind of bumming me out. Actually, I need some encouragement and I want us to be good friends.

But if you keep bumming me out and speaking to me this way, I don't know that we can be friends. And most people go, I didn't even know I was doing it. I'm sorry. Or if they double down and then they're a real jerk when you assert the conversation, you were just given the gift of the evidence you've been waiting for. Yeah. Wow. And we're all so scared to like

But if you keep bumming me out and speaking to me this way, I don't know that we can be friends. And most people go, I didn't even know I was doing it. I'm sorry. Or if they double down and then they're a real jerk when you assert the conversation, you were just given the gift of the evidence you've been waiting for. Yeah. Wow. And we're all so scared to like

call out a family member or to limit time with a family member, because we feel like it's like this awful, you know, injustice, but not everybody is meant to be on your path. And more importantly, you're not meant to be everyone else's educators. So you've got to let, have them have their life too.

call out a family member or to limit time with a family member, because we feel like it's like this awful, you know, injustice, but not everybody is meant to be on your path. And more importantly, you're not meant to be everyone else's educators. So you've got to let, have them have their life too.

You really got to like, let them like, I, I also, people don't like this phrase, but it's like, you're not in charge of everybody else's train wreck. Wow. And you, And you don't have to rescue and fix everyone. You don't have to rescue and fix everyone. And a lot of reasons people stay with people who are actually hurtful towards them is they're trying to save that person.

You really got to like, let them like, I, I also, people don't like this phrase, but it's like, you're not in charge of everybody else's train wreck. Wow. And you, And you don't have to rescue and fix everyone. You don't have to rescue and fix everyone. And a lot of reasons people stay with people who are actually hurtful towards them is they're trying to save that person.

They're trying to be the educator of that person. They're taking responsibility of that person. So they're staying with that person who's actually hurting them. And the issue is to let go of the responsibility. And then you'll find your freedom. Yeah.