Brett Cooper

Like, I genuinely think that you would be hard pressed to find a mother that hasn't had any feelings of doubt or pain or loneliness as she transitions into this period of her life, even if you've had three babies.

I still hear moms talk about how difficult

That transition is welcoming a new life into your family, somebody who is completely dependent upon you.

I am a new mom, my baby is only six months old, I can only speak to my own experience, and this is coming from somebody who, you know, has always wanted to be a mom, and also who had a relatively easy pregnancy and delivery.

Even with all of that, I still got home from the hospital 24 hours after giving birth, and I felt like a shell of a human being.

Even though I have sat on this show and on comment section talking about how desperately I wanted to be a mom, how excited I was, I still got home and said, I have no idea what I've done and I have no idea what I've gotten myself into and I have no idea what to do.

I was so desperately excited.

I was so in love with our baby, but I have also, in those early weeks,

I have never felt so disconnected from me and my body.

I was irritable, I was angry in a lot of ways.

I definitely had the sundown blues, like the moment that it started to get dark outside, I would get so anxious and worried about the night ahead and how many times he was gonna wake up and if he was gonna be okay and if co-sleeping was gonna work out or if he would go in the bassinet.

I mean, it was just like,

And yes, there were a couple of times where when I had 10 minutes by myself and I would stand in the shower, I would cry and think, I don't know if I can do this.

I don't know if I've made a mistake because the adjustment was just that hard.

And based on what I have read and watched and talked to friends about, I think a lot of that, honestly, is just normal because of the insane hormone crash that you have after giving birth, because of the trauma that your body literally

goes through giving birth, you have a wound like the size of this in your stomach, and it's all a sacrifice.

But for me, I knew that a lot of that might take place, I knew that my body was gonna go through something insane, I knew that I might feel completely out of sorts after giving birth, but that was a sacrifice that was so clearly worth making to me.

But I knew that my life was gonna be completely changed, I knew that going into it, I was kind of trepidatious about it because of all the different stories, but it was a sacrifice.

And it did take me about five-ish months, literally just like February, January, to even feel like Brett again.

Like I was laying next to Alex in bed and I was like laughing and telling a joke.