Bron Lewis

And then it dawned on me that all of these appointments that she'd made me come back for, none of them were for Ari.

They were entirely for me.

But she knew that if she came out swinging at the start going, you're not well, I would never have gone back.

I would never have seen her again and I would have just been swallowed up into just the dark hole of depression because I hadn't suffered from postnatal depression from what I could understand.

I had suffered from postnatal anxiety.

I knew that beast.

I could pick that beast out in the line-up.

I knew what that looked like.

I knew what it felt like.

I knew what it smelled like.

Everything.

I was intimately familiar with postnatal anxiety.

But postnatal depression, that was new to me.

And I just felt that I was sad.

Not even sad, I was numb.

I was completely numb.

Everything was dark.

And I thought that was just because I was tired.

And that was because I was recovering from a traumatic thing and soon it would be easy.

As soon as he was crawling, I'd be fine.