Bryan Greene

Tell me how I can do it or tell me how you do it.

And this skeptic is ready to turn believer.

Because at the end of the day, there are a few people that I'd like to talk to also.

I'd love to pick the brain of George Carlin, have tea with Dr. Wayne Dyer, take a walk around the park with MLK Jr., or get really fucking high with Mitch Hedberg.

But until one of those ghosts that keep piggy-fronting Teresa Caputo pulls that wig right off of her head during a live taping of the Kelly Clarkson show, I'm just not buying what the TV psychics are selling.

Now before I leave you, because I'm cute like that,

I want to wrap this all up by bringing it back to the beginning when we talked about Psychic Friends Network and Miss Cleo and Dionne Warwick and the billion-dollar pay-by-minute phone industry that started this modern psychic craze.

It would be easy to think that that's all behind us, that the scamsters and con artists taking people for $3.99 a minute have long been put in their place, and now it's just mindless primetime entertainment and live tours at half-empty arenas.

You're wrong.

Take a listen to this.

Feel like you're going nowhere?

Unable to move forwards in life?

Or in love?

Talk to California Psychics.

Our trusted psychics can give you the guidance you need to see things clearly.

Our guarantee, if it's not life-changing, it's free.

You might have even heard one of these commercials inside of this show.

They're spending millions and millions to get into your pocket and make billions and billions, answering the questions we all so desperately need answered.

I even thought about calling one of those psychics and putting that tape here in the episode.

But all I could hear when I thought about making that phone call was my dad's angry voice.