Casey Jordan

Well, stalking is very often part of a much larger trajectory of true violence.

But it doesn't always turn violent, though, right?

No, it doesn't always turn violent.

It depends on how you handle it.

And it also depends on law enforcement's reaction to your complaints.

Again, every stalker is different.

And it's really important to understand what is their motivation if you're going to figure out the best way to handle it.

Now, keep in mind that stalking starts with unwarranted contact, right?

This is a person who won't stop once you have pointed out, I don't want you to be in touch with me.

The biggest problem, I would argue, especially that women do, because of the way we're socialized, you're kind.

And kindness for certain stalkers throws fuel on the fire.

It gives them even more power.

They're abusing you, but you're going to soften it and just go, you know what, you're a really nice guy, but I'm just not that interested.

They will very often excessively not just follow you, but message you, give you unwanted gifts, which leaves you with a feeling of obligation to thank you.

They will follow.

One of the biggest things you have to do is really monitor whether they're following you.

It is not a coincidence when they're always in the grocery store in your classes.

And this can be really difficult if your stalker is somebody who has an excuse to be in your perimeter.

You work together.

you're in the same clubs, things like that, and they figure out what your Achilles heel is, then they exploit that vulnerability of you.