Cathy Rentzenbrink

Sometimes I say I haven't read something when I have because I didn't like it.

I don't want to sag it off because there is a special place waiting in the afterworld for people that are mean about other people's books.

So sometimes I say I haven't read things when I have.

But there are all sorts of ways in which when in a bookshop somebody says to you, have you read this?

And you say, you politely say something like, oh, I haven't got round to it yet, but it was reviewed excellently in the Sunday Times this week.

And that often makes someone...

read the book.

But mainly I just read loads of books because I liked reading loads of books.

Yeah, go on.

Because of all of that, I know that you were a massive pain in the arse in the staff room.

I bet you continually moaned about the customers and thought you knew better than any of them about what they should be reading.

I tell you what, I witnessed a shocker, right?

So one of the nice things about, well, being a bookseller is nice in lots and lots of ways.

You don't get paid very much money.

But what certainly used to happen when I was a bookseller in London was that publishers would invite you to publicity things for their authors.

And partly because you didn't get paid very money.

You'd often be like a bit hungry.

So you'd then very quickly eat all the food and get really drunk.

And occasionally make a bit of a fool of yourself and fall down the stairs and snog an author at the bar and stuff.

Not that I personally ever did that, you understand.