CeCe Lyra

Yes, I will probably root for one more than the other.

This is normal.

but I need to be fascinated by both.

So I think you're holding back on the melody chapter.

There are so many instances where there's opportunity for depth, opportunity for messiness, opportunity for curiosity seeds.

There are no curiosity seeds.

Like the text message, it's not working.

I also don't like the fact that she decides for reasons she cannot explain

to keep the message this time like it feels forced there's the scene where the husband the scene but there's a couple lines i'm gonna read it the girl glanced up at billy with a smile and a blush mel's lips tightened into a flat line she was no longer surprised but it still hurt if you go deeper in that moment you could potentially uncover messiness and power dynamics

I want to understand her better and I want to be fascinated by her and I'm not.

So if I had gotten this as a submission, I probably still would have requested the full to see if all the Iris chapters are really, really strong.

And if the melody chapters get better, because maybe there will be like a vision that I could talk to the author about.

But if all of the book were Melody, I'd be, like, not interested at all, which is a shame because clearly you have the writing shops to do it.

So I think the lesson here for anyone listening is you cannot hold back.

Like, holding back is just not something you can do.

Like, not in this economy, you know?

that's the problem yeah and it has to be for the both points of view unless it's a single POV story right unless it's just irises but then that won't work in terms of us seeing the inside of the family it's it's a really old novel but Emily Giffen has a novel called Heart of the Matter I believe in which you do get three points of view the wife the husband and the other woman and

And it's so messy and you feel sympathy for everyone.

Not so much the man, but probably most people still did.

I read this and yes, I feel for Iris, but it's not that I don't feel, it's not that I am against Melody or not rooting for Melody.