Charles Duhigg

And the book explains how to practice them.

And what we know, you know, my previous book was The Power of Habit about how we build the habits within our psyche.

One of the things that we know about communication habits is that communication skills become habits very, very quickly.

If you practice something like asking deep questions, the third or fourth day you do it, it's going to feel automatic.

You're going to quit noticing that you're even doing it.

And when we look at a great communicator, what we're really looking at is someone who's just thought about that skill a little bit more, has practiced it a little bit more until it feels automatic.

And as a result, it seems very authentic because it doesn't seem like they're trying to do something artificial.

They're doing what comes to them habitually.

Not if he's doing authentically.

So the question is, is he trying to pull one over on you?

Is he trying to pretend like he's the smoothest guy on earth?

No.

No, what he's doing is he's saying like, you know what?

I'm kind of awkward.

I'm kind of like a weird guy, but you are important enough to me that I'm going to do this thing that feels a little uncomfortable.

Having met Polis and also a fan of his, like I actually see that, you know, let's use another example, Gavin Newsom.

So Gavin Newsom, when you meet Gavin Newsom one-on-one, he does not pretend to be someone besides who he is.

You know that Gavin Newsom is there to talk to you because he wants your vote, that if you say something, he's going to half listen to it.

He really is there to tell you a story about himself, right?

He comes off as slick.