Clark Fredericks

So I'm the last one and I'm watching and he's like shaking hands and he's hugging guys and shaking hands. And he's got this smile on his face. And I'm like, you phony baloney. And I go up there and he hugs me and I'm like stiff as a board. And he whispers in my ear, I've been praying for you and my congregation has been praying for you. And I pull away from him. I go, do you know who I am?

So I'm the last one and I'm watching and he's like shaking hands and he's hugging guys and shaking hands. And he's got this smile on his face. And I'm like, you phony baloney. And I go up there and he hugs me and I'm like stiff as a board. And he whispers in my ear, I've been praying for you and my congregation has been praying for you. And I pull away from him. I go, do you know who I am?

He goes, I know who you are. I read the papers. And I go, and you've been praying for me? He goes, yeah. I was like, wow, thanks, bro. He's like, yeah, you got it. And I was like, huh. And we went in there and he later on said, you know, I started off that meeting for you. And he went into the whole free will.

He goes, I know who you are. I read the papers. And I go, and you've been praying for me? He goes, yeah. I was like, wow, thanks, bro. He's like, yeah, you got it. And I was like, huh. And we went in there and he later on said, you know, I started off that meeting for you. And he went into the whole free will.

He's like, you know, a lot of you are here because people exerted free will in a negative way against you. He goes, we are not puppets on a string where God is saving the day for every calamity or every catastrophe. What would be the sense of life then? If God's always going to step in, he goes, God gave us free will and it could be used for good or for evil.

He's like, you know, a lot of you are here because people exerted free will in a negative way against you. He goes, we are not puppets on a string where God is saving the day for every calamity or every catastrophe. What would be the sense of life then? If God's always going to step in, he goes, God gave us free will and it could be used for good or for evil.

And the person sitting next to you can decide to use theirs for good or evil. And you could be vulnerable and they could use it for evil and something bad could happen to you. Doesn't mean that God doesn't love you. Doesn't mean that God's not weeping over what's happening to you. It just means that God gave us all free will and it's up to us to how we want to use it.

And the person sitting next to you can decide to use theirs for good or evil. And you could be vulnerable and they could use it for evil and something bad could happen to you. Doesn't mean that God doesn't love you. Doesn't mean that God's not weeping over what's happening to you. It just means that God gave us all free will and it's up to us to how we want to use it.

And I was like, and that instantly took that dividing wall I had between me and God down. I went up to my cell that night and I instantly started praying. Like it was just removed. Like, boom, I could close my eyes and pray. I literally could not close my eyes without just seeing crap. Like every time I tried to pray.

And I was like, and that instantly took that dividing wall I had between me and God down. I went up to my cell that night and I instantly started praying. Like it was just removed. Like, boom, I could close my eyes and pray. I literally could not close my eyes without just seeing crap. Like every time I tried to pray.

I was like, thank you, God. Like literally like, and like, I wish, I wish I could pray like I prayed in jail. Like it was so raw and it was like, like in your face to God, like, hey man, I'm in shit right now, bro. I need your help, man. I don't know how to go through another day. Like, help me, you know? And I would literally have to pray for help to get through the next 30 seconds.

I was like, thank you, God. Like literally like, and like, I wish, I wish I could pray like I prayed in jail. Like it was so raw and it was like, like in your face to God, like, hey man, I'm in shit right now, bro. I need your help, man. I don't know how to go through another day. Like, help me, you know? And I would literally have to pray for help to get through the next 30 seconds.

Like, praying for help to get through the next hour or the next day, that was like... Like, I need help just to get through the next 30 seconds. Wow. The next 30 seconds. Because I just, like, I was fighting suicidal thoughts. I was, you know, my molestations on the front page of all the papers. You know, I... You know, I've always had drugs and alcohol to lean on when I felt uncomfortable.

Like, praying for help to get through the next hour or the next day, that was like... Like, I need help just to get through the next 30 seconds. Wow. The next 30 seconds. Because I just, like, I was fighting suicidal thoughts. I was, you know, my molestations on the front page of all the papers. You know, I... You know, I've always had drugs and alcohol to lean on when I felt uncomfortable.

I got nothing now to lean on. The lawyer I picked, he said, I just want you to get this through your head right now and we're not going to talk about it again. I go, what's that? He goes, you're not getting bailed out. He goes, I don't even want you to like entertain that thought. He goes, one, I don't trust your mental state. Two, you're an addict.

I got nothing now to lean on. The lawyer I picked, he said, I just want you to get this through your head right now and we're not going to talk about it again. I go, what's that? He goes, you're not getting bailed out. He goes, I don't even want you to like entertain that thought. He goes, one, I don't trust your mental state. Two, you're an addict.

I don't trust you getting out that you wouldn't go back to drugs and alcohol. Three, you murdered someone. I don't think it looks healthy for you to go be seen in restaurants and shopping centers and bars without a care in the world. And he goes, so I want you to just stay here. I want you to work on yourself. And every day you're in here will apply to whatever sentence you get.

I don't trust you getting out that you wouldn't go back to drugs and alcohol. Three, you murdered someone. I don't think it looks healthy for you to go be seen in restaurants and shopping centers and bars without a care in the world. And he goes, so I want you to just stay here. I want you to work on yourself. And every day you're in here will apply to whatever sentence you get.

So just get comfortable in here. I was like, all right, man. You know, so that's what I did. And I would tell like all the young heroin addicts would come in and they'd want to instantly get out and they'd be, mom, you got to get me out of here, man. There's murderers in here. Me? And I'd be like, they'd hang up. And I'd be like, dude, stop hassling your mother about getting out of here.

So just get comfortable in here. I was like, all right, man. You know, so that's what I did. And I would tell like all the young heroin addicts would come in and they'd want to instantly get out and they'd be, mom, you got to get me out of here, man. There's murderers in here. Me? And I'd be like, they'd hang up. And I'd be like, dude, stop hassling your mother about getting out of here.