Chapter 1: What is discussed at the start of this section?
Hey guys, I just dropped an all new episode inside my new subscription channel, We're All Insane Plus. This month's episode is called Stalked for 25 Years. Listen now by subscribing to We're All Insane Plus for just $5.99 a month inside your Apple or Spotify app or go to we'reallinsane.com.
Dev, so my girlfriend Lisa and I drove down from Westchester, New York.
Amazing.
To see you and... We had a great dinner. We got some Maryland crab cakes.
Love it.
Yeah, it was awesome.
Gluten-free?
Gluten-free ones, yes, indeed. And now I'm ready to share my story with your audience. I wrote a book called As I sat in prison, and three and a half years ago, I got a book deal from Simon & Schuster, one of the major publishing houses. And the book came out, we sold out the first print, we're flying through the second print. So just a cheesy plug here.
I love it.
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Chapter 2: What experiences led to Clark's trauma?
Just relax, everybody. But just so you get the right one, if you want to get the book, it's the one with the bike on the side on the lawn.
And I'll link the correct one, too. Yep. So nobody will be making a mistake. Oh, man.
It's so disappointing.
It is.
You pour your heart and soul into create something that'll change lives, and then just people steal it. Yep. So the book is like phenomenal. It's got a 4.9 rating on Amazon and a 4.7 on Goodreads. There's no other memoir like that highly rated. So hopefully people will get it and they'll be inspired.
That's incredible.
By the end of this story, hopefully they'll be inspired.
Absolutely. So tell us where your story begins.
Yeah. So, I mean, I've been broken so many times in my life, like utterly broken, right? Sexually abused as a young boy by my boy scout leader. My next door neighbor who was like a brother to me committing suicide early in my life. Losing the love of my life in my college years because I carried such pain and trauma just broke me losing her. Drugs, alcohol abuse, gambling abuse,
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Chapter 3: How did Clark's childhood affect his future relationships?
He told me his friend had bought an old farmhouse and there was a desk left behind in it. And he opened up one of the drawers and it was filled with porno pictures. Hop in my truck, I'll show you some. And I'm thinking, you know, it's gonna be like a Playboy magazine or something. And he just starts showing me close-ups of penises on these Polaroids. And he's laughing like a little kid.
Aren't these funny? Aren't these a riot? And I'm like, yeah. And I say to him, like, where's all the women? And he's like, oh, those must have been in the other drawer. I'll grab those next time I'm over at my buddy's house. There was never any other pictures.
Yeah.
He tells me back then on the back cover of every magazine was the Marlboro Man. He's a fictional character, but he's quintessential cool. Smoking a cigarette, cowboy hat. And he tells me, Dennis always went out west. Every year he took two, three trips out west. Jackson Hole, Grand Canyon, you name it, wherever out there. And he told me on one of these trips down at the lake, as we were fishing,
that he met the Marlboro Man. And the Marlboro Man was the greatest guy in the world and he shared something with me. He shared a secret with me. I'll share it with you, but you gotta keep it a secret. I'm like, what's that then? He goes, the Marlboro Man's gay.
So like, I don't know if the Marlboro Man is gay or not, but he's like, I guess trying to introduce and normalize male on male sex maybe, or that behavior.
Plant the seed.
Yeah.
Question about the photos. Do you think that those were photos he had taken?
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Chapter 4: What events led to Clark confronting his abuser?
You'll never have to testify in court. I will take care of the problem myself. You just tell me if Dennis Pegg ever touched you. And he told me the story about this lady's son being raped by him and they were going to press charges. He's like, just tell me and I'll take care of Dennis Pegg myself. So by saying I'll take care of Dennis Pegg myself, I'm taking that as my father will kill Dennis.
Right.
So now, now all this pressure's on me. Like, what if it goes wrong?
And also it goes back to the dog, I feel like. You know, it just puts, it's back in this just violent, it's scary.
Yeah. So I'm like, and I, like, trust me, I debated this for a long time after my father sent me down. Like, but I'm like. I don't want to be responsible for my father going and doing life in prison or my father getting killed as he tries to avenge me. That was like too much like for my little brain to handle and for my emotions to handle. And so I just told him, no, he never touched me.
Again, my mind's trying to protect me, but it's prolonging the inevitable of a collapse. Just get it out. People, get it out. You gotta get it out. So that was around 15. At 17, my next door neighbor, Jeff, who I idolized,
who i thought he and my brother were abused by dennis as well from what he told me he would tell me your brother and jeff would get so drunk when they would come over i'd have to take their clothes off and put them to bed like why do you have to take somebody's clothes off to put them to bed i'm thinking in my head i'm like all right right and then the wrestling matches
At 17, Jeff puts a shotgun in his mouth and kills himself. And my brother and I run over there. His sister came screaming over to our house. We go over there and see Jeff, find Jeff. And I always thought from that point on, is this what is awaiting me? Is this what my outcome is going to be? I'm going to get to the point of despair that Jeff got. And I'm going to do that. So that was 17.
And you know who showed up to take a family member to the morgue to identify the body?
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Chapter 5: What realizations does Clark have after his actions?
Right.
And he's not even there anymore. He's not even alive.
That is insanity. You can't allow your abuser that control. No. I was arrested the next day.
did your friend end up doing he went and got the van and then what we got the van we drove back to my house i'm bleeding i had a glove on and then i'm like in my garage i took the blood off there's just blood every in his van there's blood everywhere and i'm like bro i gotta run up and get a roll of paper towels like just then we gotta think about this
I run up to get the paper towels and I see the van backing down my driveway. And I'm like... Well, yeah. What the hell, man? And I knew this injury was going to be my downfall.
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Chapter 6: How does Clark describe his experience in jail?
Like, you can't just walk into a hospital with a wound like that and be like... Stab myself. Yeah. And the irony of all that... is that one Christmas, this was my Boy Scout hunting knife. And one Christmas, Dennis bought me a knife sharpening kit, a whetstone, an oil, and over a glass or two of eggnog at our house, he taught me how to sharpen my knife to keep the perfect blade on it.
And for 33 years, I kept the perfect blade on that knife. And that's a knife, subconsciously, I took with me to his house. I woke up that next morning and I knew I'm like, I just sat there like digging my fingers into my head. And I'm like, I can't believe like what I did. I can't believe it. And I'm like, I'm so screwed. I'm like, what am I going to do with this injury?
Like I need medical attention. My hand's like this. It's literally like that.
And obviously Dennis was just left at his house. Yeah. Okay.
Chapter 7: What led to Clark's decision to become an advocate?
And he didn't live with anybody. Nobody.
Okay. No. And it was, my mother had just come up from Florida. So welcome home mom.
Right.
And, uh, I called the buddy that night to come over who saw me earlier in the night and like, like called me like, you know, like, He saw I was not in the right frame of mind. He's like, you need me, call me later. And I called him. I said, come over. And the girl I was dating at the time, I said, come over here. And I said my goodbyes to them. And I sent my buddy up to wake my mother up.
And I told her I took care of a problem that needed to be taken care of. I took care of Dennis Pegg. And she couldn't fathom what I was telling her. She's like, why you? Why would you have to go do that?
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Chapter 8: How did Clark's story impact others and lead to his current life?
And I'm like, to avenge all the boys' lives he's ruined. And she's like, all right, that's well and good, but why you? I couldn't tell her I was one of those boys. Still couldn't even say it to my mother. And my mother called my sister early in the morning and my sister's like, you know, Oh, we gotta do a wellbeing checkup. Like maybe, maybe Clark's just like out of it.
Like nothing happened or maybe Dennis is wounded and we can get him help before he does die. And we can save Clark from a life sentence.
Yeah.
So they called in a wellbeing check and Dennis was dead. And the cops surround my house. And when I'm lying in bed, I got up, poured a glass of wine and I look out my window and there's cops everywhere. Like my street is lined with a dozen plus cop cars. They're behind trees. They're behind rock walls. They're behind the shed out back. They're everywhere. I pound that glass of wine.
And like, I mean, the feeling of like, it's over. Like, it's just, like I said, there's so many times I've been broken in my life. And I poured another glass of wine. And out of a loudspeaker, I hear Mr. Frederick's come out of your house with your hands up. And I chugged that glass of wine. And I grew up in the Episcopal church as an altar boy.
And at age 12, back then, the old minister was like, if you do good, good things will happen to you. If you step out of line, you incur God's wrath. And I had 12 years old getting raped by an animal. Like I couldn't understand how I could have done something so heinous to incur God's wrath. And I put a wall up between God and me back then.
And I went through this, God to me became a lucky rabbit's foot. Like I would get into risky drug deals and risky behavior and driving high and be like, you owe me, bro. You better get me through this. That was my relationship with God. You owe me. And now as I'm walking to my front door, I said to God, God, I'm done with life. Like, I forfeit the rest of it.
Please let one of these cops shoot me when I step out on my front porch. And I stepped out and I put my hands out and I put my head back and nothing happened. I was waiting for that crack of a gun just to be like, ah, it's over. Instead, I was spreading gold on my front lawn, handcuffed and taken away to the police barracks. At the police barracks, something amazing happened.
The lieutenant of the state police who worked the crime scene came into my holding cell and said, I want to apologize to you. I go, what do you want to apologize to me for? And he's like, I've known about Dennis Pegg for a long time. I've heard rumors about him, but I can't arrest somebody for rumors. Like people think he's gay. Are they just making up
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