Comedian

I thought it was Eddie Bravo. Donald Trump is some kind of tough guy. He's not. I mean, look at him. He wears more makeup than Dolly Parton. Wines like a baby. The guy's afraid of birds. Donald Trump had his daddy pay a doctor to say his little feet hurt so he could dodge the draft. Look at that gut. Like a garbage bag full of buttermilk.

I thought it was Eddie Bravo. Donald Trump is some kind of tough guy. He's not. I mean, look at him. He wears more makeup than Dolly Parton. Wines like a baby. The guy's afraid of birds. Donald Trump had his daddy pay a doctor to say his little feet hurt so he could dodge the draft. Look at that gut. Like a garbage bag full of buttermilk.

I thought it was Eddie Bravo. Donald Trump is some kind of tough guy. He's not. I mean, look at him. He wears more makeup than Dolly Parton. Wines like a baby. The guy's afraid of birds. Donald Trump had his daddy pay a doctor to say his little feet hurt so he could dodge the draft. Look at that gut. Like a garbage bag full of buttermilk.

He sells imaginary baseball cards pretending to be a cowboy fireman. Guy's barely strong enough to hold an umbrella. While he's working out.

He sells imaginary baseball cards pretending to be a cowboy fireman. Guy's barely strong enough to hold an umbrella. While he's working out.

He sells imaginary baseball cards pretending to be a cowboy fireman. Guy's barely strong enough to hold an umbrella. While he's working out.

I don't know. Pink chickadee.

I don't know. Pink chickadee.

I don't know. Pink chickadee.

Big ones. Like Dolly Parton. He cheats at golf. He creeps around beauty pageant dressing rooms. You know that little dance he does?

Big ones. Like Dolly Parton. He cheats at golf. He creeps around beauty pageant dressing rooms. You know that little dance he does?

Big ones. Like Dolly Parton. He cheats at golf. He creeps around beauty pageant dressing rooms. You know that little dance he does?

He's moody. He pouts. He throws tantrums. No, get those lights off! He acts like a five-year-old behind the wheel of a truck. He bends over for Putin. This cat here on social media is a middle school bean girl. The guy needs help walking downhill. Almost there, Grandma. So this November, let's stop kidding ourselves. Donald Trump is afraid.

He's moody. He pouts. He throws tantrums. No, get those lights off! He acts like a five-year-old behind the wheel of a truck. He bends over for Putin. This cat here on social media is a middle school bean girl. The guy needs help walking downhill. Almost there, Grandma. So this November, let's stop kidding ourselves. Donald Trump is afraid.

He's moody. He pouts. He throws tantrums. No, get those lights off! He acts like a five-year-old behind the wheel of a truck. He bends over for Putin. This cat here on social media is a middle school bean girl. The guy needs help walking downhill. Almost there, Grandma. So this November, let's stop kidding ourselves. Donald Trump is afraid.

Look at this. The punches. Murrow street. And being locked at.

Look at this. The punches. Murrow street. And being locked at.

Look at this. The punches. Murrow street. And being locked at.

Mostly, he's terrified that real red-blooded American men will find out that he's a weak, tubby toddler.

Mostly, he's terrified that real red-blooded American men will find out that he's a weak, tubby toddler.