Conan O'Brien
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Appearances Over Time
Podcast Appearances
He's going to monetize these bits.
And so you wouldn't want me dead because you'd know you can sponge off me the rest of your life as you do now.
Even if we don't kill Gorley, he dies of, like, the milk sickness.
Yeah, you'd get the rheumatism, you know?
You'd have braces on your chest and your legs.
Make them out of a cruder material, and that's what you would have in this scenario.
And then I do say, after you're gone, we do feel badly, and we go visit your grave for a little while.
But then we move on, because I'm a big deal.
It's like Tom Sawyer, Huck Finn, you're up in a tree, you fake your death, you're up in a tree listening to your own eulogy, but then you fall out of the tree and you're killed.
We roll you right into the grave we've already dug.
I think we all know that's what's happening.