Dan Savage

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So this woman, this woman you like, this kind woman... is so skinny, you don't want to fuck her. You're not that attracted to her. She's so not your usual physical type that you're having to game your systems in order to build up any interest in getting with her sexually. You're avoiding porn.

So this woman, this woman you like, this kind woman... is so skinny, you don't want to fuck her. You're not that attracted to her. She's so not your usual physical type that you're having to game your systems in order to build up any interest in getting with her sexually. You're avoiding porn.

You're not masturbating so that when you do see her, you'll be so desperately horny that you will fuck her anyway, even though she's not... your type. It's fine to have a type. It's fine to have physical preferences. It is not fine to attempt to mold people into your type to try to force them to become the physical person or type, the body that you usually get with or are attracted to.

You're not masturbating so that when you do see her, you'll be so desperately horny that you will fuck her anyway, even though she's not... your type. It's fine to have a type. It's fine to have physical preferences. It is not fine to attempt to mold people into your type to try to force them to become the physical person or type, the body that you usually get with or are attracted to.

It's only been a couple of months. I think the kindest possible thing you can do in a situation like this is just recognize that it's not working out for reasons that aren't yours to attempt to control. You don't get to retrofit this woman.

It's only been a couple of months. I think the kindest possible thing you can do in a situation like this is just recognize that it's not working out for reasons that aren't yours to attempt to control. You don't get to retrofit this woman.

You don't get to edit or change or blow up or inflate her body to suit you, to fit into your erotic narrative or work with your erotic imagination about the body type that really like gets you going.

You don't get to edit or change or blow up or inflate her body to suit you, to fit into your erotic narrative or work with your erotic imagination about the body type that really like gets you going.

If a particular body type is necessary for you to experience arousal and be intimate with someone, or there's one or two physical types that are libido killers for you, go seek that physical type that arouses you and don't date people.

If a particular body type is necessary for you to experience arousal and be intimate with someone, or there's one or two physical types that are libido killers for you, go seek that physical type that arouses you and don't date people.

that are a physical type that doesn't arouse you because you will eventually find yourself in this position where someone's made a minor, let's not overestimate this, it's only been a couple of months, somebody's made a minor emotional investment in you and has begun a couple months in to start thinking of this relationship as having legs, skinny legs, potentially long-term.

that are a physical type that doesn't arouse you because you will eventually find yourself in this position where someone's made a minor, let's not overestimate this, it's only been a couple of months, somebody's made a minor emotional investment in you and has begun a couple months in to start thinking of this relationship as having legs, skinny legs, potentially long-term.

And it's just not going to work out. It's not going to work out for reasons that You shouldn't rake yourself over the coals about. You gave it a chance. You gave her a chance. You gave Skinny a chance. And it's just not working for you. And if you're at the point where you're like, my options here are avoiding porn,

And it's just not going to work out. It's not going to work out for reasons that You shouldn't rake yourself over the coals about. You gave it a chance. You gave her a chance. You gave Skinny a chance. And it's just not working for you. And if you're at the point where you're like, my options here are avoiding porn,