Davina Rankin

Yeah, just kind of on autopilot and going through life, ticking the boxes until I got to my point of everything just changing, you know, life turning itself upside down and me really just being like left with me.

Yeah.

And there was a period of time where like it was almost unbearable to sit with myself because there was just like lots that was coming up and out.

And like absolutely I was outsourcing different people and different modalities and things to help me with myself.

But there was just, you know, one point in time where waking up just felt like as soon as I woke up I had anxiety.

It was just fuck.

like not even my coffee would make it worse like everything was just it felt really all-consuming and I remember there was this one day where I sat on my bed and I'm like the only way through this is like literally through it like I have to sit in this and go through it and I just remember it was like my throat felt like it was closing up and usually when

Us as humans, when we have these bodily reactions or what we call anxiety or fear or whatever it is, jealous or all of these interesting things that pop up in the body, it's so easy for us to distract ourselves away from it, whether it be through food or through drinking or through sex or...

whatever.

But this one day I was like, you know what, I'm actually just going to sit in it.

And I think it was the first time I'd ever really just gone into my body and actually felt what that, it felt like hands around my throat and just really noticing where I felt that and what it felt like and where it started and where it ended.

And

then the more time I spent in there, like it was interesting.

I could see colors or I could notice it looking like a rope.

You know, it's funny what shows up when you actually are curious about what's going on in the body and how the mind or how you perceive what it is.

So I just took my time kind of sitting in it.

And before I knew it, my hands started moving and like I started moving.

And then it was almost like I was pushing it up and out.

And as soon as I got to this one point, it was like the floodgates opened and I just cried like this really intense, almost primal cry.

And it felt like it came from the depths of my being.