Demaris

But like somebody who you're close to, but not super close.

Like it's like, oh yeah, we love each other, but we're not.

You kind of tiptoe around them a little bit more.

But you only got to have that conversation once or twice and then the boundary is set and you're done with that discomfort.

And if they do come to your space without your permission or after you set a boundary, you got to make people uncomfortable.

They don't need a key.

You have to make people uncomfortable.

People come to my house and I come up after them with like cleaning wipes.

I put, I pick glasses up, put coasters down.

I'm cleaning up around.

I'm going to make you extremely uncomfortable until you get like, you want to leave.

life and when i say their own life i mean hobbies and things that keep them active and distracted yeah because when my mother is out with her friends and she's like she don't give her she don't think about me but any other day she calling me every literally once a day yeah like what you doing what did you eat i just had a chicken tender it was great i'm like okay mom like she sends me pictures of herself i'm like mom i know what you look like i have not forgotten what you look like yeah

And a lot of, a lot of parents weren't parenting in that, like you weren't my emotional support animal when I was a kid.

And now that I'm an adult, you need an emotional support animal and you need it to be me.

We didn't, that was not our relationship when we were, when I was younger.

Don't try to make that our relationship when I'm older.

That's a relationship that has to start from the very beginning.

I'm not talking about all everybody's relationship with their parents because some people do have healthy relationships with their parents.

But speaking for me, my mother is like, well, why don't you need me?

Like her, like that's her thing.