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New Rory & MAL

Episode 254 | Friends With Benefits

26 Mar 2024

Transcription

Chapter 1: What is discussed at the start of this section?

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This is an iHeart Podcast. Guaranteed human. On paper, the three hosts of the Nick Dick and Paul show are geniuses. We can explain how AI works, data centers, but there are certain things that we don't necessarily understand.

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17.054 - 20.637 Rory

Better version of play stupid games, win stupid prizes. Yes.

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20.797 - 25.242 Mal

Which, by the way, wasn't Taylor Swift who said that for the first time. I actually, I thought it was. I got that wrong.

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But hey, no one's perfect. We're pretty close, though. Listen to the Nick Dick and Paul show on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

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35.688 - 52.768 Demaris

It's Financial Literacy Month and the podcast Eating While Broke is bringing real conversations about money, growth, and building your future. This month, hear from top streamer Zoe Spencer and venture capitalist Lakeisha Landrum-Pierre as they share their journeys from starting out to leveling up.

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There's an economic component to communities thriving. If there's not enough money and entrepreneurship happening in communities, they fail.

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Listen to Eating While Broke from the Black Effect Podcast Network on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

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I'm Daniel Alarcon, and this is my friend who's much more famous than I am. I wouldn't go that far, but I'm John Green, co-host of the podcast The Away End with my old friend Daniel. On our podcast The Away End, we'll share with you the magic of international football, all leading up to the 2026 World Cup.

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Together, we'll find out why, of all the unimportant things, football, soccer, is the most important. Listen to The Away End with Daniel Alarcon and John Green on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm not exaggerating on this at all. His name was Pablo. I know this sounds like an awful bit. Of course his name was Pablo. It sounds like an awful bit.

Chapter 2: How do our childhood gaming experiences shape us?

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Man, they really got you guys. Speaking of makeup, I've seen Rihanna's opening a Fenty Beauty in China, which means she's about to make another $2 billion or something like that. Probably more. Nice. She might own that country by the end of the time. Yeah. So everyone's mental health is exactly the same. All right, cool. I'm actually doing a lot better.

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I thought your quietness, I thought, was a tell. No. That's what I was trying to make fun of. Yeah, when they don't want to talk about it? Yeah, like, all right. I'd rather not. No, I'm just making fun of them all. But then sometimes it's like that quietness is like, someone ask me.

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1375.923 - 1376.244 Julian

Yeah, please.

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Ask me directly if I'm okay. Someone ask me if I'm okay. Yeah. Now that you mention it, how are you? I'm doing better. I'm doing really good. Yeah, so anyway. I know you've had some feelings with the 20s to 30s thing. Some feelings?

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Yeah.

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um yeah but outside of that outside of my birthday i'm actually feeling pretty good i think it's the going to the gym and like eating better thing i guess it really does help it's a big thing um yeah so do you think you'll leave people in in your 20s no i feel like i've i feel like you should have gotten that done by like 25 there's no reason you're going into 30 or like when people say leaving people in the past year like damn if you did it right the past couple years you wouldn't have to do that every year like the people in my life are good i'm

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Good. I was always on that side. I always found it weird. New year, new me. It's the same. If you're a shitty person, then the time change isn't going to change anything. That's not what changes it. But I don't know. If that's what helps you, maybe you need that one point. My 30th birthday... everyone else that was fucked up out of here. I can pick a day. I think that strategy works for people.

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It's funny you mentioned that because I was shuffling through voicemails the last few days and someone left a voicemail that reminded me that in terms of setting boundaries, and importantly with people that you love that are in your life, but as you become older and you move into a new apartment or get new things and you're becoming an individual, how do you

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respect and love those people, but also be like, this is my space. I need to be alone. So I kind of want to share this one. And I know it's early in the episode, but this conversation just directly reminds me of that. I'll play for you guys. I would love to hear it. Please do. All right, what's good, y'all? Was not expecting a guy.

Chapter 3: What are the signs of autism in childhood friendships?

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They don't need a key. You have to make people uncomfortable. People come to my house and I come up after them with like cleaning wipes. I put, I pick glasses up, put coasters down. I'm cleaning up around. I'm going to make you extremely uncomfortable until you get like, you want to leave.

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Until you be like, I'm never going over there. Yeah, exactly. What happens if they already have a key and know the garage code and know the back? You got to buy another house, Rory. Yeah. You need to chase that. Not tell anybody where it is. Simple. See what I do. Yeah. Look at mall. We still, we've moved. How many times we don't even know where the old place is.

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My mom will find, find a way to guilt trip me to give her the new address. Her, her most recent one. Your current home has to be the decoy home. You don't love your mom. Yes. I love you, mom. That, that, That's one-on-one. Yeah. That's, that's Illmatic. Like that one, that's a classic. We've been through that. It's celebrated its 25th year. Like that's, that's whatever.

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Her newest one is telling me about her best friend's son, who I know, who's a good guy. I like him a lot. Um, just how amazing he is. He, he just had a daughter, maybe like a year before Mara was born. And just tells me how amazing his relationship is with his mom. And, the daughter and the grandma and how they all fucking live in this amazing house.

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Like that's all she does to try to guilt trip me. Cause the direct shit isn't working. It's like Machiavelli shit. Yeah. I would literally ignore her. Every parent tried. My mom used to try to do shit like that about like when we were in high school, compare it. Oh, so-and-so's, you know, studying so hard and going to this school. I'm like, good for them. I'm not that person. Yeah. I hate that.

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And my mom, we, we've talked it out. We're good. But like, that was like always a thing for a while. It does get a little demeaning and hurtful when you're not a piece of shit. If I was some bum on her couch and was like, oh, look, so-and-so's son is getting his master's. I could see that strategy to try to motivate you. You're on my couch. Look what people you grew up with are doing.

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I'm not a bum. Stop telling me how successful everyone else is just because they have a better relationship with their mother. Maybe you should look in the fucking mirror.

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Yeah.

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Maybe it's you. Maybe you should be more like that mom and I shouldn't be more like that son. Exactly. Did you ever think of it that way, mom? Can't say that. Why can't you say that? Why can't you say that? Because I know my mom and it's like she's at the age where it's it's over. Like there's no development happening. Yeah. She's not like one day going to be like, you know what?

Chapter 4: What happens when feelings develop in a friends with benefits situation?

3343.549 - 3344.631 Julian

She made the mistake after.

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Yeah, I hate women like that. It was fucked up that after he confessed that he really wanted her. And you know he told her that while he was in it.

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oh oh oh i love you oh yeah i want to be with you it sounded like he said that before i think he said that before he said that while it was missionary i think he said it again but let's go with her story they met up before and he said that to her i'm getting divorced but you were always the one i wanted to be with you're my fucking soulmate that's when flame then he said i love you and i want to be with you while he was hitting it she was like oh no you're not really my type but then you know

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Blame it on the alcohol. They went back. He definitely said that while fucking face-to-face. And she probably responded. She's fucked up for that. But this is the easiest way to let him down. You're going through a divorce. I don't want to get right into a relationship with someone that's coming out of a long-term divorce. We could be cool. We could be friends. We could fuck around. But nah.

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Like, you... Be single for a little bit, bro. No, she's got to stop fucking him. Agreed. She's going to be mature about this. She needs to stop fucking him. You're giving like logical, real advice. That's not the world we live in. They're going to continue to fuck. Yeah, we have an account for women brain. So just tell him, yo, you're coming, which is the truth in my opinion.

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He's coming out of a divorce. Yo, being a grown woman and fucking somebody you're not attracted to is crazy. Well, that's why I'm saying that's cap. Like, you do that when you're young.

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That's young shit.

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You do that when you like... Clearly, you're attracted to him. You fucked him twice in less than 48 hours. And she told him to come back over. You're attracted to him. It must have been good. If you told him to come back over, it was good. It was good for sure. She just don't want to be with him. They fucked Friday. She said, let's do this again tomorrow on Saturday. He said, I can't.

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She said, okay, Sunday. You like this guy. And I don't... Enough to fuck him. I wouldn't put like on it. But the sex was good the first time she had it. She said the first time she had it, she was drunk. Women are crazy.

Chapter 5: How do boundaries shift in friends with benefits relationships?

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She said the first time she had it, she was drunk. It must have been good.

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3453.457 - 3465.433 Demaris

So she did it again. And, you know, and sis, this is no shade to you because I don't know you. Some women like the feeling of being wanted and being pursued, but they know they don't want nothing with that man. But it was an ego boost.

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men do it all the time too but she said she's not attracted to him yeah how do you sleep and lay with somebody you're not attracted i thought she said he's not my type not her type so i'll ask you a two-part question after you fucked with a girl has she ever said to you it's crazy this happened in a polite way it's crazy this happened like you're not even really my type it's weird that this happened and two were you offended by that no i don't really care if i already hit you can say whatever

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I've had that conversation with more than one woman. They're like, yeah, you're not really my type. It's weird that I like you. You're the only white man I've ever slept with. That's happened before. Have you ever been an experimental white boy? Hell yeah. More so in college. I've been an experimental black guy. I'm always the sidestep experiment. It happened. I check mad boxes.

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In high school, everyone's just horny and no one really has experiences. Once I got to college, that's when I had women like, yeah, I've never slept with a white guy. I know everyone's incredible and they're amazing and they've never done anything wrong in their lives. I maybe took advantage of that a few times. Man, I took your van, man. What's that do? Like, all right, bet.

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I'll be your guinea pig. This white girl. If you're going to give me pussy because you just want to do. I know you don't. It's the. It's the theory. I know you don't like me, but I'm not what I'm not going to capitalize. I did it from. I was young. I fucked that white girl from Mother Africa. She was like, yo, pussy. If you ate her pussy, then it wasn't from Mother Africa. You ate white pussy.

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In my life? You ate colonizer pussy? Dr. Umar? Of course. Have I eaten white pussy? You ate colonizer pussy? Hell yeah, I've eaten white pussy before. Who hasn't eaten white pussy? Are you kidding me? Rory? I've eaten white pussy. Alright. Are you kidding me, bro? I've definitely eaten white pussy. I should ask somebody who didn't eat white bread before.

Chapter 6: What advice is given for managing expectations in casual relationships?

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Like, are you kidding me? Who hasn't eaten white pussy? Much more dangerous than white pussy. Absolutely. But I did it from other Africa. I was in there trying all kinds of shit on that white girl. She's like, yo, you the first black guy I've ever... Word? Watch this. I think I might have put on Kunta Kinte on TV. Turned that pussy into Wakanda. Yeah, I went crazy. I went crazy.

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You had roots playing on the TV. I did it for Chadwick. I was like, yo, listen, man. This is for Chadwick. Yeah, I went crazy. I went crazy. Chadwick wasn't even born. Yeah, what year was this? No, this was like two years ago? Three years ago. Okay. This was like three or four years ago. You ate white pussy for the first time three years ago? Not for the first time.

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You hit it from the back like this the whole time? For the Bronx. For the Bronx?

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Oh, no, I'm sorry. It's like this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I did it for the Bronx, though. Yeah. But I feel like women do sleep with people that were not their initial type. Mm-hmm. And, like, end up liking them sometimes. Men? So, I think you're looking at this different. She didn't straight up be like, yo, I found him ugly as fuck. Yeah. It wasn't really her type, so...

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Without an actual conversation or a vibe check or chemistry wasn't visually what she usually goes for. That happens with women. That happens with men too. Yeah, but this is somebody she's known for so many years and she always felt like he wasn't her type. So now why all of a sudden now do you give him some pussy? Well, if you have not seen me in 20 years, you don't know me. Yeah. True.

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You don't know me. Absolutely. I agree with you on that. You haven't seen me in two years. But that's what makes it. But that's what makes this situation even more weird to me is because, yo, you don't know this. Yeah. Y'all knew each other when y'all were younger. Just kind of relinked up and kind of getting to know each other again.

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And then the first time y'all hang out, like now he gets to have sex. Yeah. Sis, I'm not going to lie to you. And then you want to tell him, like, nah, I ain't feeling you like that. And it's like... She played it like a guy. But that's why I'm saying she's a demon.

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You have an easy out because in all honesty, this nigga just got a divorce and he's older and now he can't go out here in these streets and move the way that he used to move when he was younger and you were a safe thing.

Chapter 7: How can content creators balance their passion with financial security?

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It's worse on her part. But no, he didn't leave what I love you though. He said, I love you while they were having sex or right after he had sex. No, that's not what she said when they were, when they met, he was like, I've always wanted to be with you. I always saw us together. And that was like him airing out his divorce and his regret for his last relationship. And then she slept with him.

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And then he said, I love you. And then he said it again. Like, cause he meant it the first time before they fucked. And then they fucked again.

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so now you're gonna tell my man after he poured his heart out twice and you gave him pussy both times you're gonna be like actually I'm good she's fucked up he emptied his heart and his loins which I mean if you balance it out 23 24 not is it worth it sometimes I just think she has the easy out because he's coming out of a divorce. She got to move. It's an easy, easy out.

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Do you remember the first white girl you slept with? What was your first trip to Morris Park as a teen? Who was the first white girl? What Italian girl with a racist father in the Bronx did you fuck? The one Italian girl that I actually dated, her father was cool as fuck. He was super cool. I can't remember the first white girl I slept with, though. Marilyn Monroe. I can't.

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I'm trying to think about who was the first white girl. You just get that much pussy. No, I just have been fucking for that many years. The first white girl, I cannot remember who's the first white girl I had sex with. And that's white. I don't remember. I cannot remember the first white girl I slept with. Damaris, remember the first white girl you slept with?

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I've never slept with a white woman in my life. Really? No. There's some warriors out there. There's some white warriors out there. I just feel like there's probably a lot of beautiful, poor white women in Syracuse that we're just giving it up. Why are they going to be poor? Because there's a lot of poor whites in upstate New York. Yeah.

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Like an abundance of poor, like the worst human beings that are. I mean, I slept with a mixed girl.

4006.263 - 4007.904 Demaris

She was French and black.

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Okay. That's nice. She was gorgeous. A little cappuccino. But yeah, other than that, what's wrong with you? French mother or black mother? Black mother. Wow. Whoa. She got that seasoning. She can make you a seasoned croissant. I like that. Spicy. A spicy croissant. That sounds like something Hillary Clinton would eat on the breakfast club.

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