Dr. Alok 'Dr. K' Kanodia

What actually works way better is receiving help.

So when someone helps you, they feel good.

They're like, I did something good today.

So they actually have a lot of like positive emotion associated with you.

Now, when you chronically ask for help, when you're like someone who never reciprocates and things like that, that's a problem.

But in the opening chess move, like offering help to someone or receiving help from someone is one of the best ways to form a relationship.

I also like this idea of like narrative and sort of like owning your narrative.

I detect a fair amount of cognitive reframing that you've learned how to do over the years.

Right.

So like when we have our identity wrapped up in something, the narrative, the reflexive cognition is I got laid off.

That means I am less worthy.

Right.

It's not the company's fault.

It's my fault because I'm not as bad.

I mean, I'm not as good as the people who got to stay or whatever.

And so really like sort of owning, and even if there are like shortcomings or weaknesses or things like that, right?

Like I don't, and owning up really where you are and, and admitting to yourself, I don't know what comes next.

Um, and I think those kinds of things I think are, are like basically universally helpful.

Like they, they work on the level of cognition and the brain and stuff like that.

And it doesn't surprise me that you figured that stuff out.