Dr. Alok (Dr. K)

Right.

So I am tall.

I am short.

I am rich.

I am a loser.

I'm a winner.

I'm successful.

All of these are abstractions.

They're not things that you can biopsy.

So even if I say I'm a doctor, you can't biopsy without biopsy.

a shared mental abstract illusion of that you can't find a doctor in me it's not a real thing it's something that i identify with and and that's that's something that's really hard for people to understand and i think it's it's very valuable to think about kind of what he's saying which is that how much of your suffering it's not so much that something is happening right so that's not really what suffering is pain is a part of life so you can't avoid pain but suffering is different

Suffering is the attachment, the associations with the thing that is painful.

So breaking up with someone arguably is painful.

The real suffering comes with the associations that you attach to it.

I'm going to be alone for the rest of my life if I can't make it with this person, then this, then this, then this.

And so if you really think about it, there's the actual pain of the breakup, which even then is not actually that bad if you really think about it.

So this just means that you won't see this person for some period of time.

But if you kind of think about it, you don't see that person for an hour during the day and you're fine.

Right?

I shower and eat and whatever without this person.