Dr. Alok Kanojia (Dr. K)

It will say, oh, it tries to understand this rejection.

It concludes that I am a loser.

Now, even though that event is one time, the feeling of loser lives within you and it'll keep popping up when you start to go out and you do things.

So one of the techniques that you can do is go back in time and try to ask yourself, how did I form this conclusion from this single event?

Right.

And your mind will give you lots of logical reasons, which is why this is hard to do on your own.

But that's where we have to reinterpret the past.

OK, so why do I see this as I am a loser and I need to fundamentally fix myself as opposed to this was just one rejection?

Right.

Maybe they were having a bad day.

Maybe they're asexual.

Maybe they're in a relationship.

Maybe they're not attracted to my gender, like whatever.

There are all kinds of reasons that this person could say this.

But why do we make a conclusion about it?

So we have to go back and reinterpret the conclusion.

The second thing that we do, and this person says, just put yourself out there.

So this is going to be how you just put yourself out there.

Because a lot of people will say, just put yourself out there.

And we hate, we hate, hate, hate just being told to put ourselves out there.