Dr. April Ilkmen

Yeah.

Yeah.

I was like, I feel like I don't have any emotions. I was like, I just feel like I'm empty inside. And I started crying. She's like, no, you don't, you're crying. So there's something there, you know, there's something in there. You're definitely crying. So there's something in there. It's just, there's something blocking it. We got to figure out a way to kind of lower down the gates.

I was like, I feel like I don't have any emotions. I was like, I just feel like I'm empty inside. And I started crying. She's like, no, you don't, you're crying. So there's something there, you know, there's something in there. You're definitely crying. So there's something in there. It's just, there's something blocking it. We got to figure out a way to kind of lower down the gates.

She's kind of described it like a castle. You got to figure out a way to lower down the gates because you can't walk around just like sealed up all the time.

She's kind of described it like a castle. You got to figure out a way to lower down the gates because you can't walk around just like sealed up all the time.

My very first thought is typically the narcissistic reaction. It really, really is. It's kind of like, pow. The first thought is probably going to be self-serving, super defensive, and egotistical, whatever it is. So I have to take my time to respond now. So I take a deep breath. I'm like, okay, okay. I have to ask myself, is that narcissism or is this normal?

My very first thought is typically the narcissistic reaction. It really, really is. It's kind of like, pow. The first thought is probably going to be self-serving, super defensive, and egotistical, whatever it is. So I have to take my time to respond now. So I take a deep breath. I'm like, okay, okay. I have to ask myself, is that narcissism or is this normal?

It's kind of like I have dual thoughts now. I have competing thoughts. It's kind of like it's opened a whole new door up and there's somebody else living up here and they're just like sitting in a room. Like my brain is like there's a narcissistic part of me and a non-narcissist part of me. They're like sitting in the living room arguing, you know.

It's kind of like I have dual thoughts now. I have competing thoughts. It's kind of like it's opened a whole new door up and there's somebody else living up here and they're just like sitting in a room. Like my brain is like there's a narcissistic part of me and a non-narcissist part of me. They're like sitting in the living room arguing, you know.

All day long. Yeah. I don't find very much peace.

All day long. Yeah. I don't find very much peace.