Dr. Ciara Kelly

Exactly.

It took months or possibly years to get to wherever you're at that you want to live together and blend your families and all of that.

Allow that for the kids too.

It will take them months and possibly years for it to feel...

All right.

And also your children, your respective children, they don't have to be best friends with each other.

They're not actually siblings.

If they can rub along and get on and maybe see the good in each other...

I wonder, do sometimes we want it to be perfect immediately, not just because it, first of all, alleviates our stress that maybe we had about it, but also maybe in some ways it validates our decisions.

This is all perfect because, you know, I did these things and made these choices in my life, but it's all perfect.

I think sometimes...

These children still have their actual mom or their actual dad.

They have that relationship too.

This is a side hustle for them.

Do you know what I'm saying?

Exactly.

They can play them off against each other.

But do you know what I mean?

It is a side hustle.

They still have their two primary parents.