Dr. Corinne Low

You value her well-being.

And that's why I just think utility is such a useful framework because it helps us to see that things that feel bad can be good.

And it makes us feel less trapped, even though – not to take anything – I don't want to gaslight anybody about how hard it is because, like, oh, my God, is it hard, right?

But just to understand, to say –

Instead of feeling trapped, seeing this as, no, the reason I'm doing this, the reason I'm investing so much in this is that I do value this person's well-being and I do value the meaning of this time together.

So I think it's a helpful way to give ourselves back agency to understand that framework of utility.

And this is so unfair.

And it's structurally unfair.

And it's like, then you have these huge disparities between the people who have kids or have spouses and who don't.

And that, you know, this should really be something that we can solve collectively as a society.

And we've made it harder as a society because we have the nuclear family and because people move away from their natal home.

You know, me and my siblings are all in different states.

And then our parents are in different states.

And it's like, well, whose job is this, right?

Like, how do we figure this out?

So that, I think, we need to be thinking about what are the long-term solutions here.

Yeah.

I was just thinking in my head that there's this study showing that because women tend to choose jobs that have social meaning, that we feel like are impactful, that we are actually penalized in our wages because, you know, they're like, oh, well, partly you're getting paid in this sort of intrinsic reward, right, of doing this.

And so I was just going off in this direction of being like, it's so depressing, but I feel like we almost penalize people for kind of loving what they do because then it means you can get away with paying them less, right?

Yeah.