Dr. Erica Komisar

Yeah, secures. Well, if you're healthy, you're attracted to reciprocally healthy relationships and you trust your environment. So you trust in loving relationships and avoidance sometimes are attracted to avoidant. people because there's no conflict there. So in other words, someone who can't commit with someone also who can't commit, that can break down those at some point.

Yeah, secures. Well, if you're healthy, you're attracted to reciprocally healthy relationships and you trust your environment. So you trust in loving relationships and avoidance sometimes are attracted to avoidant. people because there's no conflict there. So in other words, someone who can't commit with someone also who can't commit, that can break down those at some point.

So remember that these are pathological defenses. So we use the word defense because it means to protect. one, right? And defenses help us until they no longer help us. And so we say attachment disorders are pathological defenses, meaning they don't usually last a lifetime. They break down at some point.

So remember that these are pathological defenses. So we use the word defense because it means to protect. one, right? And defenses help us until they no longer help us. And so we say attachment disorders are pathological defenses, meaning they don't usually last a lifetime. They break down at some point.

And so you might be with another avoidant attachment disordered person, but at some point, one of you breaks down and then realizes that you need the other. And then you

And so you might be with another avoidant attachment disordered person, but at some point, one of you breaks down and then realizes that you need the other. And then you

you know then you're with in a relationship with someone who can't give back so yeah as we say like levels of water meet so people will be attracted to one another often of the same ilk but but it isn't necessarily a healthy relationship and of all these four attachment styles who do you think which attachment style from in your opinion and from your observations and the people that you've seen is most likely to have a successful and then also unsuccessful relationship

you know then you're with in a relationship with someone who can't give back so yeah as we say like levels of water meet so people will be attracted to one another often of the same ilk but but it isn't necessarily a healthy relationship and of all these four attachment styles who do you think which attachment style from in your opinion and from your observations and the people that you've seen is most likely to have a successful and then also unsuccessful relationship

oh, well, secure attachment will have a successful, I mean, people with secure attachment will be drawn to healthy, reciprocal, loving, deep connections because they've had a deep and loving connection with their mother. So remember I said that it's only after three years of age that you internalize the feeling of security.

oh, well, secure attachment will have a successful, I mean, people with secure attachment will be drawn to healthy, reciprocal, loving, deep connections because they've had a deep and loving connection with their mother. So remember I said that it's only after three years of age that you internalize the feeling of security.

And where you internalize the feeling that the world is a safe place and you can trust the people in it and you can trust to love another person. And so, you know, we throw that word trust around, but we don't realize that it comes from the very beginnings of our development.

And where you internalize the feeling that the world is a safe place and you can trust the people in it and you can trust to love another person. And so, you know, we throw that word trust around, but we don't realize that it comes from the very beginnings of our development.

When we don't trust others, it's generally because we couldn't trust those that we were to depend upon when we were at our most vulnerable stage.

When we don't trust others, it's generally because we couldn't trust those that we were to depend upon when we were at our most vulnerable stage.

That's disorganized, yeah. They have a very hard time forming relationships, holding on to relationships. Yeah, I would say they're the most complicated to treat and they're also the most complicated in terms of, you know, being able to have successful relationships in the future.

That's disorganized, yeah. They have a very hard time forming relationships, holding on to relationships. Yeah, I would say they're the most complicated to treat and they're also the most complicated in terms of, you know, being able to have successful relationships in the future.

Yeah, it's a good question. Well, there's something in the developing world called maternal depletion syndrome, which is that mothers can actually die in the developing world of having too many children in too short a period of time. They get depleted physically, but they also get depleted emotionally. I'm going to say it right now so everybody can hear it who's watching this.

Yeah, it's a good question. Well, there's something in the developing world called maternal depletion syndrome, which is that mothers can actually die in the developing world of having too many children in too short a period of time. They get depleted physically, but they also get depleted emotionally. I'm going to say it right now so everybody can hear it who's watching this.

Having children is stressful. It is frustrating. It does require that you are sleepless for the first five years. It requires that you can tolerate a lot of discomfort and frustration. So if there was a job description, first it would say the most joyful, enriching thing you can do in your entire life.

Having children is stressful. It is frustrating. It does require that you are sleepless for the first five years. It requires that you can tolerate a lot of discomfort and frustration. So if there was a job description, first it would say the most joyful, enriching thing you can do in your entire life.